Throwback Thursday: The Bartender Tried To Warn Me | Gabriel Iglesias

I'm not trying to lecture anyone this is what you have to do with your life Helen I'm sure you like burgers kill them I like to ask I'm just saying that's what I'm going through and then people think, oh, he is. trying to lose weight because he's making movies he wants to look better he wants to be accepted he wants to be except no no no no no no no no don't get twisted you guys don't even think that at my highest weight of 445 pounds the level of acceptance I had was amazing it's okay to tell you like that to tell you like that at 445 pounds there were women throwing themselves at me at 445 pounds there were men Oh, in the bay area let me tell you something about gay men I know you're here I saw the line I'm going to tell you something about gay men Gay men are very creative, they are very persistent and very opportunistic when they want to achieve the mission, they are just as calculated.

As straight men are, I'll give an example, tell your story correctly, so one night Athena and I are at a bar and we're having a few drinks, and that shouldn't surprise us, they really were drinking, yeah, we killed it, so' Martinez was drinking and I was listening to a conversation that was happening about 15 feet away between these two girls, they were going back and forth and one of them was saying, I don't think we finished the whole bottle, how the hell are we doing? I was supposed to get home Matta then gets up, looks at me and says brother, I'll be back and then the hunt began.

Gaiman are exactly the same way they listen, they concentrate, they pay attention, they wait for one of the cows to move away from the rest of the herd so they can corner it and attack four hours later, but Athena and I are at the bar and I'm 16 tequila shots and oh yeah, and I feel fantastic and I tell my team, bro, I don't remember the last one. The time I had these tequila shots and Martine says bro, you're crazy and fluffy, you're crazy right here, I have to pee, so he leans over to the bathroom and I lean against the bar, the bar is the only thing I can do.

He remains standing and from the other side of the room this guy gets up and looks at his friends and says I'll be back and then the search began 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 10 and he Gets in my face and tells me I just have to say I'm a big fan of yours, oh my gosh, every time someone says they're a big fan of mine, it automatically makes me smile even more, if I've been drinking . oh yeah if I'm drinking I say thank you thank you bro I was so loaded I leaned over thank you the guy puts his hand on my shoulder and says I just have to say you helped me get through a tough time and he stops talk and squeeze and say oh my god, did you work?

He was so drunk I said you're the first person to notice and he says oh he could totally tell and he squeezed again and I said ah I'm sorry. I'm overdoing it, no bro, you don't understand, I'm stressed, that felt pretty good. I want him to rub your shoulders and your back and scratch you because I will and I will, he grabs me by the shoulders. shoulders and he turns me around now I'm in front of the

bartender

and the

bartender

is trying to

warn

me the bartender says hi, I'm so drunk I'm like