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This SAVAGE Girl Does NOT Deserve FAME... in Bitlife

This SAVAGE Girl Does NOT Deserve FAME... in Bitlife
happy day I'm glad and I don't take criticism well and I also don't have any sort of discernible talent however ever since I was young I've always wanted to be famous I want people to know who I am when my kid asks what I do I want to say your mom has talents my name is Mercedes wiglesworth Mercedes is a good name I might have to change my stage name to anything but Wigglesworth but we'll see I'm 92% attractive and in the bit life world that goes a long way so I'm
this savage girl does not deserve fame in bitlife
ready to start my path to

fame

I have a little sister now named Bridget Zuckerberg she got a way better name than me she was a result of a random bumble hookup I was also the result of a random bumble hookup why didn't I get a cool ass knee mom why do you have to go to mr. Wigglesworth two years old and nothing happened all I know is like New York New York United States I'm ready to climb I'm ready to be famous I have a half sister I just have so many half sisters my mom cannot stop
using different hookup apps and wait my mother gave birth to a

girl

named Gisele Mitchell why couldn't I have been Mercedes Mitchell I'm changing my name all my goodness I have the mumps

this

is my chance as a celebrity to heighten slacktivism and make everyone know that the month of Sirius I'm gonna stand it on my class and be like ladies and gentlemen the mumps are a serious problem I'm your celebrity Mercedes and I have months to I know you might think I'm perfect but
I've got the mumps I should be at home in bed right now because it's highly contagious but awareness is important okay good oh it's a least favorite side-effect of the mumps you just got to get rid of him one mump at a time mom take me to the doctor I know like in front of my whole class I was like I have the mumps and I'm proud but seriously I just want to get it removed alvaro Trump he sounds good I no longer have the mumps okay but I'm really glad that I had it just
because raising awareness is very important to me as a celebrity because it's one of the only things that I know how to do okay I got a study harder you broke your mother's bedroom window when you were doing an incredible speech what will you do admit that I broke it or it wasn't me well I'm going to be like mother I am an artiste and I break things sometimes because it's called method acting just like how I punched Bridget for having a better last name than me I'm
admitting it I admitted to my mother that I broke her bedroom window and in doing so my looks went up from 94% to 100% okay that's how I know that I'm on the way to being a celebrity my family Kat Oakley died at the age of 11 I need to post on social media about

this

I can't have social media yet how am I going to get people to feel sorry for me for a bad thing that happened if I'm too young for social media mom take me to the movies you went to go see the magical umbrella that
little child actress and it probably smokes like 20 cigarettes a day they should have hired me it's time to go to your first school dance and you were attracted to a boy named Cooper little would Mercedes littlewood is a really good famous name and I think that Cooper would be blessed to go with me I'm gonna walk up to Cooper and be like hey boy I'm about to be famous so you're gonna want to be there before I take off okay cuz after I take off I'm only gonna date really
good-looking famous successful guys so go with me to the dance you took Cooper Littlewood to the school - I have a boyfriend why do my looks go down by 1% I'm starting to wonder if my dad is in the Mafia in

this

family we all have many different dads so if one of them isn't working out just pay attention to the other one I'm studying harder Kent okay honestly just let me join social media please some of your friends from school asked you if you want to go to the movies with them what
will you do me a celebrity do I have time for

this

do I have time I need to go do another speech on the couch over there I don't know if I have time to go to the movies however I am a really great celebrity because I spend time with my fans so yes young plebeians I will go to the theater with you I'm going to

this

movie because there's gonna be a lot of people there and I have the following speech prepared ladies and gentlemen boys and

girl

s turn off your phones my cat died please
feel sorry for me I'm struggling I'm struggling hard the mumps cat died last name Wigglesworth nobody cared and everybody booed me and my enjoyment was really bad I should have asked him to fill me what's wrong with me I also shouldn't told him to turn off their phones before I told them my name's I'm 13 years old and I am in the 8th grade I'm joining social media everybody out there better watch out because it is oh-fer for you guys / hostess status I got zero likes
okay that's just that's just social media playing games on me I'm gonna post another set okay you know what I guess I'll study harder why do my post get zero likes I'm really good-looking 13 didn't go too well for me I'm a bit of a starving artist right now but 14 is the year of me I'm posting a photo I got zero likes again oh okay so I'm not verified that

does

n't help hopefully Twitter will change that follow me on Twitter by the way maybe I'll get
verified at uni Cassie years on social media one posts three I have 96 followers and nobody is liking my photos I'm 14 I can't take drunk pictures and posting status I got one leg oh my god oh uh cold I'm gonna post a video about having a cold sup guys it's a

girl

magic Mercedes and I'm sick my nose is itchy but I'm holding the phone with one hand and holding the cup in the other Twiggy scratch my nose quick thanks for tuning in guys I don't know if I should get rid
of

this

cold or if I should like kind of milk it you know for viewers and followers I'm gonna milk it a little bit more post status I got four likes Oh I'm officially famous I can't go to the doctor cause I'm sick of

this

but I'm gonna pretend to everybody that like I I consistently have the cold even though I no longer have a cold driver license test when you take it um well other people are gonna have to drive me around because I'm famous but I'll take it anyway
I'm just gonna smart what is

this

road sign means snowmobile crossing ski lodge property or snow Ranger patrol just hold the wheel crossing the past you posted session how are my posts only getting two likes I need to get more famous or maybe I can like find someone to date who's famous so I'll get even more famous all I've been doing is studying and posting updates and my posts are only getting ten likes I've been doing

this

for years now okay I graduated perfect what am I
gonna do we got a job instead I want to be an actress I want to be something that like people really pay attention to voiceover actor me

this

is what I was meant to do okay so I'm gonna post on social media and be like I just got my first big break and I got 13 likes everything's working out for me am i famous yet okay I need to work harder maybe I'm not getting famous enough cuz I haven't just because I just haven't gotten the eyelid surgery of my dreams okay that's for
getting the eyelid surgery your half sister Bridget has confessed to you that she's considering coming out of the closet what do you do make a video on it and supporter recognition would you encourage your half-sister pratik to come out of the closet and told her that you love her and support her no matter what as long as she comes on my channel and says hey Mercedes is so supportive great person subscribed come on can I please be famous now eighteen likes

this

is really good I'm gonna
work harder and then I'm gonna ask for a promotion it's been rejected great you are feeling strong heterosexual tendencies what are you I'm straight I'm bisexual and gay I'm gonna say bisexual today oh come on get me famous zero likes but I

deserve

to be famous I

deserve

to be liked my half sister Bridget married skylar hill at 23 year old receptionist and she's a hairdresser wait I got a raise but what about other job listings can I be like an actual actor lead actor oh
apply no okay there's a cheaper lead actor one I can be a secondary lead actor no ho okay fine you know what actor how about that no how about an even cheaper actor oh I guess I'll work harder what if I take a vacation and take a bunch of pictures for my Instagram I'm gonna do that I'm gonna go to Havana and I'm going to fly first-class great I'm feeling wonderful Gaylord Swift meets me at a concert and wants me to date him he wasn't asking me on a date there's no
way I'm all about my

fame

in my career and I'm gonna be lonely until the end until I actually get famous I'm working harder he's given me a promotion okay they gave me a promotion perfect so I'm posting on social media and now

this

might be the year 26 likes yes

this

might actually be the year where I become an actor give me the job okay what if I give me the cheaper job hey give me the big one no please somebody anybody okay I mean I'm making like really good I've
been promoted to actor I'm an actor hey guys social media everybody check me out it's a little late I thought I was gonna be famous by the time I was 12 but guess what I am famous and I got three likes why I've always said if I'm not famous by the time I'm 30 that I'm gonna quit so like I have to get famous I just have to browse other job listings

this

might be the time where I get denied okay so I made 46 K right now and let's see if the other actor job has been
better it's not so I just have to keep grinding until I'm a lead actor but like I'm getting kind of old okay seriously my posts are still getting 12 likes like nothing has changed since school and I feel like I'm posting too much I feel like people are annoyed of me right now work harder ask for a promotion you were not given a promotion but you did get a raise that's not enough for me just

fame

just like what happen for certain people I got 43 likes like I'm getting
popular Blake Affleck Affleck hey he is kind of good-looking kind of very smart not very rich and kind of crazy I mean I feel like I need a little love in my life right now because I'm what they call a failing actress and I I need to be taken care of I'm on a date I'm now dating Blake outlet would preferred Ben Affleck but what can you do work harder post on social media get me famous 50 likes okay now I'm going to try to get that lead actor job I need it come on Manzi side films
like they just own everything here maybe I'm on the blacklist like maybe nobody likes me I'm lead actor oh okay I posted it 24 likes still I'm turning a famous

girl

at the ripe old age of 33 years old I am officially a movie star and I'm super famous I am officially famous and they're stars and I'm 30 percent famous like I it's finally working well finally penis vein tab oh okay wait I'm gonna do a commercial $77,000 me to do a commercial I'm doing it and
this savage girl does not deserve fame in bitlife
everybody loved it and I'm gonna so Sancho charade yeah I'm gonna show some social media I got 81 likes okay I can be a little more famous than

this

I'm gonna request verification okay verified I needed that I need to work harder I need to ask for a raise I'm famous now you have to give me a raise no why not I'm managing my

fame

photo shoot time sign me up 460 Suzu oh wait I was nude in that your father is arguing with you because you showed up to a magazine in your birthday
suit I didn't quite read the contract before I agreed to do it sorry dad once I showed up I was like oh my curse and I had to take off my old sweater dress that's unfortunate dad I'm sorry about that but should I argue back dad I'm arguing bad because you do not own my body I get to do whatever I want so win it I'm going on a talk show no one is currently into six okay I'll just do another commercial for a hundred grand easy did anyone want to look at my social media 648
likes I yelled at my dad then he had a stroke Oh even though I yelled at my dad I'm gonna post on social media and be like I was the best daughter ever and nobody cares he didn't care because he had a stroke oh goody whoa okay so all these photo shoots just they don't want me to like just smile like Glamour magazine they want me to like do stuff that I can't do it okay Jones rides is offered for you to appear in a regional television commercial I'm doing am I gonna get more
than a thousand likes on social media

this

year 1.9 mm I'm actually like killing the game right now and my

fame

like I want to see what happens when I get up to like 100% same Reinier Insurance Group has offered to pay you to appear in a regional television commercial so here's my issue I feel like there's a lot of commercials for like insurance and stuff like that that celebrities do like once they're falling off so I'd prefer to like not the only photo shoots I'm
getting are just really bad ones your boyfriend Blake really wants to have a threesome with you and a female named Betty Tyson I mean we're in Los Angeles and we're living that life so let's do it Wow Blake really enjoyed it and I didn't at all your boyfriend Blake has left you I'm famous what well fine I'm calling TMZ right now hello TMZ I got cheated wait no no that's not a good look for me never mind everything's fine okay I'm gonna work harder I'm
gonna do commercial more of them United properties like two million dollars oh okay now when I post a social media like everyone's gonna love me only 500 likes that's less than last year hello 98%

Fame

I might actually be able to take a picture at a photo shoot that isn't having my butt hanging out no I don't want to be on January's issue of soccer moms I can't I guess I'll just be in Jada laughs oh just be like buy

this

electronic guys man it's tough being famous
all these things pulling me in different directions that I don't want to do okay I've got three hundred and twenty-two thousand followers now that should translate to about like two thousand likes her photo if I'm doing it right and I'm correct yes let's browse other job listings like what if there's like something even crazier that I could be doing lead actor at Mayberry studios I can ditch these scuffed people over at seaside studios and work for Mayberry photo shoot
time stop it soccer moms I don't want to be I'm gonna go on the talk show oh you were interviewed on The Tonight Show Starring Terry but face I got a bunch of funny people to like write my thing for me because I'm not very funny and it worked out amazing everybody loves me I'm gonna post on social media just to like let my haters know that I was on a late night television show and I'm writing a book

Fame

and shame being Wigglesworth okay we're not gonna use our last names
in any of

this

how about Mercedes and inside account that's beautiful writing oh I made a lot of money from that your book Mercedes and inside account became a best-seller I want to gonna talk to you again Oh nobody wants to okay soccer moms just literally won't leave me alone and nobody's booking me for commercials am I getting old how old am i I'm 38 years old I need to work harder I need to work the hardest I've ever worked in my whole life while being followed around by
the paparazzi one pop it off so it tries grabbing your hair in an attempt to get a reaction from you what do you do assault him cover your face pretend he's not there or posed for

this

photo I love

Fame

so I'm gonna say pull my hair senior and take the photo now can I please go on a talk show again Terry butt face wants me back Thank You Terry buck face he's giving me all he's giving me everything I've ever wanted Atlantic properties wants to offer me 2.7 million dollars just
like it we're gonna be the richest I've ever been wait my

fame

is going down hell I got a browse other jobs list job listings and find an even better no

this

is the best I could possibly do I can't let my

fame

go away I'm an old lady now 97 likes everything is good everything is going to crap right now okay so I'm a multi-millionaire but a lady named Susan futures tells you that you have the most comfortable bed ever with all that money what do you do well I mean I have been
lonely for quite some time I guess I'm gonna do the old you know the old skunk and trunk you know longer question here number-one fan is thank you actually I really shouldn't be doing that with fans but hey maybe she was the right person cuz my famous back to a hundred percent now you know what I'm gonna do since I'm like kind of old and like kind of scoffed right now I think I'm gonna start doing photo shoots I think I'm gonna start doing you know the old sloppy sloppy
photo shoots maybe it'll give me more

fame

maybe it'll give me more notoriety oh and it works I really hope that what I did on that magazine twice now it was worth it thirty-nine Wow okay you know what I'm just gonna go ahead and take all of these I was gonna say take all the pictures in the world but I can't right now all right Terry butt face let me on your show ask for a raise I've been rejected I'm 41 years old okay we're doing another non clothes photo shoot can
I write another book how about confessions should it be called confessions maybe I'm like getting kind of older now and I'm like really feeling my last name maybe the Wigglesworth Chronicles is a good title that made a lot more money in the last book I will say maybe I maybe I'm starting to like

this

whole Wigglesworth thing doing another commercial please social media please embrace me 46,000 likes I'm finally at the level that I've always wanted to be I'm rich I'm a
chief just net worth of 20 million while sitting on a park bench you encounter a non famous stray cat I guess I'll keep it as a pet even though it's not famous just cuz I want people to know I want everyone on social media to know that like I bring in animals from the wild and it bites me every day but as long as it

does

n't bite my face we're in business we're gonna name you we're gonna be Wiggles cuz I'm like wiglesworth Wiggles I love that love everything that has
my name involved okay do another electronics commercial because we're cleaning up here time to help a soccer moms you know what we're doing it hey Holly Suzuki has invited me on a talk show that's definitely different than Terry butt face I'm going on the show and I'm posting on social murder off okay my life's really going down every year and I don't know what to do wait I have a million followers I'm a social media star but if I have a million followers like

does

n't really count if I don't have the engagement I mean I do kind of have the engagement what happens if I post on social media like a lot in a row nope okay I was gonna say I think that the key might be posting a lot jade electronics is the only place that has ever hired me I'm like the electronics

girl

that's what everybody knows me as I'm like kind of lonely oh I have is

this

cat that yells at me you saw someone call your mother a puck bunny I don't really have like
the leverage to be able to assault her because like I'll go to jail they'll they'll know that they could sue me what do I do I guess I'll insult her back I'm gonna insult her back on social media I'm gonna go on social media right now and be like

this

girl

is impose oh and everybody's gonna like it cause people like drama and it got fifty nine thousand likes that just goes to show ya that if you air out your dirty laundry online you may not be very smart but it works
the famous chef Caleb Hancock said it's no secret you're an untalented hoochie

this

is the first so I got your blanket but it's still kind of wet you don't want a blanket oh you must be really sad I do want okay here you go what do you want to be recognized for my talents what are the talents just because I posed in a few dirty magazines don't you think uh yeah I mean you're good at soccer okay oh I hate her everybody's got haters but I didn't even do anything
she's got a rise and overcome it how she's ruining my reputation everybody's laughing at me like you know how when one person says something negative and enough people see it everybody starts believing it's that thing and there's nothing I can do about fixing my reputation if you can't beat them join them so well that's what you want me to do you want me to be like I am a floozy that's what I'm gonna do that no don't she thinks she's so great just
because she can cook oh wow she can cook look at her I can make a good grilled cheese sandwich and I don't call other people untalented who jeez I'm returning the insults oh you called her a conceited biznitch in a television interview my fam went down so much for that social media you guys agree with me TMZ teams he won't answer my calls you know they always say don't respond to hate but like I had to the insurance company is only offering me a 100k that would have been a
life-changing amount of money when I was little but now I expect two million dollars and I'm gonna do turning it down and apple bottom babies is offering me only 100k I can't do that nobody wants to talk to me I'm gonna release a book and then everybody's gonna see that I'm a nice person and that they should subscribe to my monthly newsletter again I'm gonna do being Mercedes because nobody knows what it's like to be me no saeho's oh my gosh I don't know what
this savage girl does not deserve fame in bitlife
to do please pay attention to me okay I'm still getting 30,000 likes like come on work harder ask for her raise it got rejected I have to start getting desperate I have to start doing every job that comes my way I'm gonna do

this

stupid insurance commercial nobody liked it ah okay so that's fine it's fine it's fine it's fine it's fine fine I'm gonna do apple bottom babies okay everybody liked it everybody gets mad at me when I do these dirty photo shoots but
nobody is giving me a chance to do anything else and people on Twitter coming out saying that I steal their viewers cuz my sweater puppets are out but I have no choice I tried to write a book I tried to be smart about it I tried to be that movie star that everyone looks up to but nobody's giving me a chance nobody's giving me a chance has to work harder and harder and harder and harder social media love me love me I got 90,000 likes that's the most I've ever gotten I am still
relevant oh that one wasn't as relevant as the last one but what can you do please somebody book me okay okay I'm getting the 1.2 million commercial offers back and I'm gonna kill

this

one you're gonna be so impressed by how well I do with

this

commercial have you ever used a phone before have you ever used a phone hey I know you use that one everything that you know try not to do it just okay have you ever used a phone alright cuz we're gonna have to get a different

girl

no
no no I can do it different ah maybe the

girl

was right that I am a one-trick pony they don't want to hire me anymore curves magazine has offered you two a deal I can't I'm gonna be called a one-trick pony again Rhonda Cunningham wants me on her show I'm going okay so I'm at 97%

Fame

right now and like I just need more I need more

fame

I need more of it 67k likes celebrity feud the famous dirty video star Selena Houston mentioned you were an overrated loser in a magazine
interview what are you Trent what are you doing what's going on in the couch because nobody likes me I'm overrated I smell bad all I do is take photoshoots ago

does

anyone like phones I mean yeah that commercial wasn't very good but what maybe I should give up you can't give up now 47 years old you look great yeah I guess last time I returned the insult it almost ruined my career but I'm so caddy I got to return the insults add an award acceptance speech I was like and I just
like everyone to know

this

what's her name again whoever said the meat thing is I can't remember her name is an untalented wench Cheers oh I can't believe Selena Houston said that about me I'm gonna work even harder I'm gonna work so hard no one's even gonna understand why I work so hard pasture-raised to ask for a raise but nothing happened are they late is everyone like give me the cold shoulder now I'm gonna do a commercial for a million dollars okay my

fame

is
like going down okay I mean I it always comes down to the dirty magazines it's all I can do it's all I can do but hey it really brings out my

Fame

every time I post on social media like people care people love me and it's a good thing I never learned how to read because I can only really hear when people say bad things about me I don't really read the comments the car you were being driven around and got into an accident and now a paparazzo is trying to take pictures of you what
do you do so I was driving around town not wearing any makeup and not looking very good at all he got in a car crash and now someone's trying to take a picture of me I can add a pose for his photo assault him pretend he's not there will cover my face last time I was in a compromised position I took the photo and all I want in

this

life is to be famous so even if I like pose for the photo and I look really bad everyone will be talking about how I look bad right so like it's good press
I'm posing it brought my

fame

up to 100 percent oh I'm so famous right now I'm going so strong I'm not getting that many likes anymore but I'm getting 2.5 million per commercial now nobody liked it I need a better PR guy I swear I do curves magazine wants to give me 1.2 million to do another dirty shoot

this

is the only kind of stuff that I get like I'm just trying to what I got rejected from my race I'm working so hard my mom died she only gave me 250,000 I'm
attending her funeral no paparazzi is allowed and I'm gonna post a social media about it because it's all I ever do okay it's time to do another commercial for 2.6 million oh and people liked it you know sometimes I sign up for a Pepsi commercial and I think it's a good idea but then nobody likes it and I don't know why I'm gonna do another shoot another

girl

is coming at me now the famous singer Pamela Luke's mentioned you were an untalented idiot in a radio
interview first time I called somebody out for calling me out it almost ruined my career the second time I survived from it do I want to be the kind of celebrity that nobody likes and nobody wants anything to do with because I'm so problematic or do I want to like only kind of pick and choose my battles I'm really curious to know what'll happen to my

fame

if I ignore her because we do know that returning the insults often makes my

fame

worse I'm gonna ignore her and just take it
like a champ wow that brought my

fame

down a lot everyone is trying to ruin my career it's almost as if it's like in the contract every time somebody gets famous come after Mercedes wiglesworth it's it's in the contract Acme grocery is offered to pay you to appear in a broccoli commercial I'm not even getting foam commercials anymore I'm getting broccoli commercials the vegetable that nobody likes wants to hire me broccoli I can what if nobody likes the broccoli
commercial only the good celebrities get asparagus commercials all I get is broccoli hey people for the length athletic exposed swimsuit edition magazine has offered you a deal to appear in a swimsuit somebody wants me to wear clothes it's only 50k but you know what sign me nobody who likes what I wear swimsuit yikes my cat died Wiggles I barely knew you I was too busy trying to grind to get some

fame

okay Jade electronics is back thank God I'm gonna do it and people like

this

I was
offended when people wanted me to not wear clothes and now I'm offended that I'm only getting offers with me wearing clothes and I just don't know what that's trying to say I guess I'll do another swimsuit edition people enjoyed it I like that I've laryngitis time for another PSA Wow how should you know what I don't know anything about laryngitis so I'm just gonna go to dr. Terry butt face and fix it okay it's time to do another commercial for two million
dollars people kind of liked it it's time to write another book okay VIP because I am a very important person despite what everybody says about me I'm writing it no and it needs so much money it became an overnight bestseller I'm going on a talk show Wow my haters can literally kiss my butt another electronics commercial I'd like to do something other than an electronics commercial oh here we go here we go more topless photo shoots people seem to like it even though I'm 56
years old maybe I'm making old fool again who knows a young lady you met while out fishing has asked you on a date she's a firefighter with no money I mean I think we could be kind of a good look Terry's mom I don't know if I want to date Terry's mom to be honest with you Terry

this

emoji actually looks like your mom should I go on a date with your mom only all my life and she can actually cook and I can't I mean I have talent I'm gonna start dating her I'm now
dating Terry's mom Wow I didn't even have to ask Jade electronics give me a commercial they just offered me one I agree every time you do something like you can't only control how it's gonna work I guess I'm meeting nude again while out riding your bike a paparazzo sticks a camera right up in your face posing for his photo because you know that's what I do you know that that is one of my thousands and thousands of talents your

girl

friend Terry's has been kidnapped and
held for ransom I got a call Kim K what did you do you cried okay thanks sweetie by school her kidnappers are demanding seven hundred and eighty thousand dollars for her return they warned you to not involve the police you do know

this

is one of those unforeseen circumstances of being famous that I never thought of what's your mom yeah I was gonna say involve the police no offense but seven hundred eighty thousand dollars is a lot of money and I don't want to set that precedent for them
to do it again don't cry okay fine I'll pay the ransom well on the bright side I made that money right back by doing a little commercial okay apple bottom babies is a creepy name for a magazine and I'm never shoot again your half-sister Bridget who has ignored me for her entire life has asked me to watch sumo wrestling actually I want to that seems kind of fun I'll do it I hate it in perfect and my

fame

went down in spending time with my family I should have known better I should
never do that again I'm gonna be in a commercial gotta work harder whoever posted social media for a year ago sent such a maniac Wow 243 thousand likes why we a my worth something now am I better than other people now are kids gonna like stick up for me now and be like she had

this

many followers so she is better than you objectively and if you died no one would care is that what kids are gonna say now in my name cuz they better okay I'm definitely not making a book called I'm not
worthy that is so stupid I'm calling it the epic light of Mercedes that it made no money oh yes I'm gonna work harder I'm gonna post my old butt in a little swimsuit okay seriously I really don't like how Jade Electronics is the only place that has ever offered me at work in my whole life even though you have a

girl

friend a young lady named Aria Henderson slips her panties into your pocket and giving you a hug oh you do don't look at me like that just cuz it's your mom
fine I'm a faithful

girl

friend gosh better take your mom out take her as ooh wow she really likes him even though I'd be completely ignored her just cuz I paid 780,000 for her all right let's take her for a walk we went to the park I'm getting less famous by the second it's not time to retire it is never time to retired I always have a very good rapport with

this

Jade electronics place okay nobody wants to hire me to pose in a lewd magazine unfortunately hopefully it's
not because of my age and hopefully it's just because it's a dry season you know okay I'm super super super super famous right now but I'm still not getting a raise really sorry one sec I'm getting a call from my publicist what's that Diana McClure said it's no secret I'm a smug sausage jockey it's always other women hey always trying to tear me down whatever happened to

girl

love whatever happened is supporting each other why is it always gotta be like

this

I'm a 69 year old women and people are calling me a sausage jockey a smug one too I'm returning the insult I'm too old to put up with

this

sausage have you ever put a delicious sausage your mouth huh have you ever delicious a tasted sausage maybe just try it more sexy you seem to be more comfortable with that is that an insult no I'm just that's why we hired you we wanted a sexy farmhouse commercial that's I can do more than that I can do serious sausage okay no let's
just the sexy I'm not biting

this

sausage camera I mean it's in the contract what you bite it no bite it no why would I bite it have you ever tried a delicious sausage no can I try it no oh wait yeah you supposed to let me so I called my hater a conceited ho and that's honestly what she gets like that's what she

deserve

s and I hope that her career is ruined nobody wants to talk to me nobody wants to publish books for me why is it that I have all of the money in the world but I
feel so empty when there's nothing I can do about making my

fame

better like why is that what is wrong with our society what is wrong with

this

wall that's a lot of likes and I'm instantly happy while going around town being a big shot a paparazzo posing as a soldier is trying to take a picture of you what do you do I guess I'll pose I mean I always pose that's what I do your

girl

friend Terry's mom has asked you to marry her you've been together for 14 years okay
I'll accept I'm married to your mom Tara I'm just so famous I thought I'd be over by the time I was 73 years old but we're still going strong you're demanding key you're demanding it I'm gonna plan the best way you've ever seen in your entire life it's gonna be out of vineyard in another vineyards Jakarta that sounds kind of good you're thinking about whether you should make your fiancee Terry's mom sign a prenuptial agreement for marrying her my
net worth a hundred and forty four million dollars her net worth negative four hundred and fifty dollars in her checking account great I'm going to make her sign a prenup and she agreed good for her she knows what she's doing because I would have left her in a heartbeat now that you're married your why don't you change your last name I could neither be Mercedes wiglesworth or Mercedes mom they're all Mercedes mamas like a good ring to it I should have figured while I was
dating that last name was gonna come into account here because I just can't have my last name be mom you know instead of a Kim kardashian-west I'm a Mercedes mom mmm wiglesworth not great I'm keeping mrs. Wiggles word it's never time to retire I'm going to do

this

until I die while sunbathing in your backyard you spot a paparazzo in a tree taking photos of you what will you do I'm gonna pretend he's not there ooh but then he's gonna make more money off of it still
if I pretend that he's not there I feel like I'll get a lot more famous for that yes yes nobody wants to take pictures of me anymore and I'm feeling a little bit insecure about Oh nobody liked that chlorophyll Rhonda Cunningham wants me to go on the show because my

fame

is declining and nobody likes me anymore and she wants to be like what's it like being washed up perfect I made a good impression oh I keep forgetting just post

this

one for me I think it's cuz I'm getting
old like it really is a struggle Wow I'm getting a lot of okay nobody wants to publish a book nobody wants to take photos of me and all I get is a commercial but hey it's working out your niece Samantha died attending her funeral oh oh I really liked my niece yikes I have to go on a vacation it's the first I've taken since I was famous Jamaica first class and I'm gonna take Terry's mom with me why not I'm gonna do it okay so my happiness is getting a little bit better
my

fame

is amazing how much morphine can I actually have here your half-sister died at the age of 79 from hepatitis B well I mean that's really unfortunate will somebody please take a picture of me like isn't there some kind of like old lady magazine that they can feature me in oh I accidentally said a bad word on TV why was Christina I didn't know if Lucan Hine was a swear in Germany my bad my PR guy literally told me to say it you just noticed a paparazzo was hiding an extraction
trying to take pictures of you what do you do I mean last time I pretended he wasn't there it really helped me that's the play maybe that's what I should do because like posing for the photo really seems like I'm desperate so I don't want to be too desperate you know I want to be like Oh what are you doing here you've been diagnosed with heart disease no America's most loved never we're in closed star Mercedes wiglesworth what do i do do I post about it to social
media wow that got a lot of likes should I try to go to the doctor can a doctor cure heart disease I continue to have heart disease okay let's go to the other doctor hopefully I can afford like the best doctor there ever was you know what I also just realized I'm a celebrity right and celebrities like they get into some pretty weird stuff when they get extremely famous like I feel like I should join like you know Scientology I feel like I should go to the wish doctor a witch doctor has
offered you a like a lizard should I try it or not try it nothing else in modern medicine can cure me and if I don't get cured by

this

leg of lizard I'm gonna be taken by heart disease anyway next year so I'm trying it I took the leg of lizard nothing happened while going around being a big-shot a paparazzo posing as a referee is trying to take a picture of you what'll you do I'm gonna cover my face

this

time oh that made my finger down yikes never doing that again I have to
do a commercial so you can fix my

fame

nobody liked it it's still the same do you think the witch doctor will make me more famous I'm 87 years old I can't let heart disease take me I need to go to the witch doctor witch doctor has offered you a lizard three what do you do I'm no longer suffering from heart disease I'm gonna be the oldest famous lady there ever was my half-sister died I'm attending your funeral that sucks but guess what I am the healthiest happiest most
amazing celebrity there ever was 88 years old still working really hard nobody wants to take pictures of me but the talk shows are having me because I have graduated from desperate and taking food photos to actual star where Jimmy Fallon will take me even though the dirty magazines won't and that's the goal really that's all I've ever wanted Terry butt face is inviting me without me even having to sneak him out I can't believe

this

oh okay we're posting on social media Oh
100,000 likes boom you noticed a paparazzo is hiding in the trash okay

this

time I'm going to Google pretend is nothing and it totally went down for me because all Mitchell funeral I'm just gonna outlive everybody is the witch doctor cured me Terry's mom retired someone's got to do all the work around here my social media is like not really popping like it used to but that's fine I can keep going on TV going on late-night talk shows is like the ultimate way to keep your

fame

up my nephew Isaac dying though that's just not great Oh everybody dying that is just not Oh everyone's dying yikes I've got depression it's time to go on another vacation because I can afford to I'm going to Kyoto Japan cuz that'd be amazing room first and I'm bringing Terry's mom with me for 15k I really enjoyed it I'm back I'm back in the game oh my goodness

this

game I'm just gonna be the most famous person in the world although the only problem is
I don't really get paid for being on talk shows and it's kind of risky doing a commercial because it's not always taken well some of your friends are eating deep-fried crocodile so my famous friends like they're always eating really weird stuff and I'm pretending to be shocked by it but I literally just ate a lizard brain and a lizard leg from the witch doctor so I'm tasting it I have diarrhea that is just not what I wanted so I'm gonna go to the doctor because I
don't know where the pepto-bismol is okay I no longer have diarrhea perfect I'm just lip the best I'm a hundred and three years old I'm gonna work harder I think I'm actually gonna live forever I think the witch doctor hacked

this

and I think we're just ready to keep going I'm gonna be famous for the rest of my life I'm the most famous old lady there ever ever was and I'm gonna keep going yeah cuz I don't even need the money at

this

point I died while
sleeping peacefully no I was so famous I wasn't a great person but I was so famous Mercedes wiglesworth you did it you had a late start but you did it and I am I for one I'm proud of you and you know a lot of people may have negative things to say about you for posing in those magazines the way that you did but I support you because you've got that bread and you were respectable by the end of it I hope you guys enjoyed

this

video if you ever want to see me again please don't
forget to hit push notifications and I will see you on the next one bye