Speed Dating 10 Comedians Based on Their Jokes | Versus 1

Hello good humans, this episode is brought to you by tic-tock before we get into the episode, here's a quick message from one of our favorite tic-tock creators, Chrissy at Live Laughter ASL, check it out thanks Christy. I'll try to use one of those. Pickup lines in the future, be sure to check out Laughter of Life, ASL and other tik-tok creators by downloading the app now, enjoy the episode, this is my first time doing a comedy. I was sitting, hopefully it's not the first laugh. My name is Harper Rose and I'm a comedian, no, but I've made out with a few.

The last guy I dated wasn't like any guy I'd ever dated before because I'm about five and seven and this guy was really addicted. to cocaine so who do you know finds love? I definitely think so because it's a very intimate art form and I think when you're so vulnerable that it opens you up to being vulnerable to other things, are you ready to laugh? Yeah, okay, how do you think? Coming on lady behind the screen hey you look great by the way dogs love dogs I think dogs are geniuses they are very good at marking

their

territory you know what I'm saying you only pee on things like I pee on this chair, right? now no one else will want to sit on it and it's mine.

The first thing I want you to know about me is that I'm not like these other guys. I'm no good, you just tell

jokes

. I'm here to find love, okay, try it. to be smarter I want to learn more things you know I'm doing all the things to become smart like I read a book I read a book but you know some people say I look like Kenan Thompson but like a thin and thick version, I'm not I'm out out of shape I'm like weightless I'm not out of shape yet, but I'm one good burger away from it, so if you did, if you could see me, you'd laugh.

It's a great joke. I generally understand better

jokes

. You can't see me, but I have a little problem with my identity currently because I got the results of a DNA test and found out I was 60% white. Now it's strange because I have all these white symptoms appearing inside me. like the other day I was sitting like you know what pack it back here I'm going to buy tickets to Europe just fly there with no plan I'll figure it out I'll figure it out I'm black I can tell by your tone you're not, you'd say pineapple belongs on pizza no Well, I guess we can't get them all, we can't win them all.

I love pineapple on pizza, so I work with children. There's a girl, Amy, she touched my belly and then. She said, "You're fat, you're pregnant, which hurts me, but I can't go to the gym, bench press at the gym, like, fuck, Amy, yeah, that's what you get, Amy, people will say : who is Amy? the girl who broke your heart you're like no, this third grade girl who made me feel small like I'm not there. I'm on the

dating

app so I noticed a lot of girls writing the same thing on everyone his profiles, which is uh, no hookups, no hookups and he actually babbles at me and tells me there aren't any girls out there so what's a good deal on a stereo even though my friend Bob works at Best Buy?

You don't owe me the hook that for you you just pee on things like them. Gentrification is reversed because there is a smell that the rich can't stand, that the poor have to get used to

their

pee, man, it's on the subway Center, don't you hate that when you have something after some actress. You really respect their work a lot and then you see the man's interview and you find out that they are British, oh, just like I think the zombies in hiding are always charming and they have a great time, no , so nervous and when the journalist asked me why Peter, that's Mickey Mouse.

I just yelled at him, I said, "Use my hands to paint dizzying things about my parents saving pandas for comedy." News headlines say autistic boy paints for his parents. That's a television credit. Where are you okay? Very sorry. but little guy, if it looks like there's going to be too much pee involved, it felt good, you know, I finally got picked first for something. I'm always last, David. I like British people, so it looks like we won't get along, Justin. sorry, well, I mean, when it comes to being eliminated, even less, a person knows that you are ugly, but he knows that he sees your face first.

I mean I haven't been able to get you out of my head, you know, I don't know if it's the game show focused on you, what are some of the things that bother you the most here, like the fires, yeah, I don't like it when they set me on fire. fire? I'm fine, it's fine, you're just not yourself. you know you're like that, you don't really like simplicity if you liked it in my tickets for the Bach concert I don't like to simplify, by the way, wait, no, I do. I love you, I love myself, what are your things that bother you?

Oh, when someone smokes cigarettes in their car, oh, great, I don't have a car, we're fine, my God, I'm there, honey, look, we're already connected, oh, I'm sure Wilbur's account, oh, I I love it, what bothers me the most is when people wear it too tied. Usually they probably have that thing here that would make you look like Jesus too and you also know you can buy mushrooms from them, yeah right, and also people who always have bad breath, that's something I learned recently, someone offers you gum. oh, you agree, yes, I always carry Listerine strips with me at all times, that was a lie.

Sorry, I don't want to start this relationship with lies, okay, you understand one thing, what are you looking for in a relationship? I'm a very dumb person, so I like girls who do things, you're like it's a ping-pong match, like maybe we start making inside jokes on the first day and then by the third day we might be saying things. crazy, dumb, that's what old Jackrabbit said you know, but oh, okay, sweet Nathan, I'm so sorry, but I have to say goodbye to you anyway, joker, breathe a little sigh of relief because now I can be like The Bachelor for ABC, so it's one, two, one, The Bachelor here.

We are here again We are once again Why did you start the comedy? I started comedy because I was telling everyone else to follow their dreams, except me. I usually have these epiphanies and I look at my hands and I realize this B and I went for and pursued my dream of being a comedian, what about you? What are your goals for 2020? My goals are to get representation across the board and then I would love to do a late night set for you to be a comedian. I'm a comedian. Wow, I know I met her love at the first curtain.

I was, I know I'll be where I'll be there at those open mics with you, baby, oh look, I can't wait, he stole my heart, well, I'll get it. up and I let you talk to these strangers but you and I have something we have something I'm sorry you have a dream you have a big dream is to get out of my studio oh we have the same dream the stars are aligned, you have extravagant points that you don't like, how to play bowling, honestly, I think you nailed it with bowling. I broke my finger on a first date bowling once, so it really triggers the bad memories we won't even have. watch The Big Lebowski, okay, bowling's over, look, what would be your ideal date?

Oh man, I don't know, like a quiet restaurant, maybe like walking to a bar after a cappuccino, okay, just some charity, people around, not enough people for where you sit. overcrowded but with enough people that if I had to scream it could save me, you know, very true, yes, that's important, safety first, yes, always mm-hmm. I think you're all very lovely, thank you, but you know why I'm a fool. the keys Tom wooed me like car keys oh wow people breaking my heart here I'll see in the scene you know I gave him a heart and told him about my hands the more you lose the more you learn you know I mean look at LeBron James he loses more finals than she won, she decided to choose which pianist we are all comics who bring pianos to a company.

I'm frustrated, that's what I am. Wow, I like that your socks match, great, these are Walmart. socks I didn't know they would be revealed, okay, your socks, thank you, these are Rite Aid socks, so I decided class, thank you. I think I made the right decision, I did too. Yeah, I was looking at all these guys. I definitely felt hurt. yeah, I would, yeah, bowling, yeah, let's go bowling, okay, this is a great time, baby, a real date, you know, I can't wait to call my mom, like it's a game show, but I finally got one.

Thanks, Chrissy If you want to check it out, be sure to download the tick-tock app and check out the amazing content on it. Thank you very much for watching another episode of versus one. Be sure to hit the like button, subscribe and we'll see you next time. peace