Ruby Wax's Mad Confessions (Award Winning Mental Health Documentary) | Only Human

Aliens one of Britain's biggest taboos there has always been the stigma of

mental

illness we are back at the witch burnings I have clinical depression which I never told anyone about until a couple of years ago I recently became the girl in the

mental

illness poster yes it was it was a career choice i'll show you where i got help at The Priory oh yeah this is the way no coming clean about my condition has really helped me. God, when I was here, I wasn't in this condition, but most people were. Suffering in silence, especially at work Now I want to support three people who are risking their careers by telling their colleagues about their mental illness.

I tweeted Are you successful in your business and suffering from mental illness? Would you talk about it on TV? It took me a long time to find someone ready to be open. Then Charlotte Fantelli, 28, responded to my tweet. She is a successful businesswoman and has OCD. She probably washes my hands 25 times a day. squeaky cream oh that's a good sign and i found design engineer derek he's 30 and has depression like me everyone and i didn't put them through what they're going through service please finally met johnny great chef who loves running his own restaurant but recently got engaged Harry Carey's TV menu the Great Briton was the turning point for me.

I thought he was going to win. Johnny felt that he was completely let down, which caused him to collapse. Well, I thought about suicide and how I would do it, idiot, but one in five people lose. the works of him when his bosses found out that they have mental

health

problems, so it's crazy to talk. I'm Derek York, could you come over here to find out what happens when Derek Charlotte and Johnny call all the services and all I see is that they have really nice boobs? and i need the name of whoever did that because something horrible has happened i made my name by getting very close to very famous people 34d 34c look at mine this is what happens after delivery should be your warning im a warning on the cigarette pack you dont have children your breasts will leave you and try to run away but even though they were opening for me i always kept it a secret that i suffered from depression i am doing this well many times i didn't say anything because if people know you have depression they won't give you a job when i look going back i think my bouts of depression probably started when i was a teenager i grew up in the beautiful suburb of evanston illinois there are my dream parents i was their pride and joy my dad edward had started his own hot dog business.

A vehicle in which my father returned home did not help. We didn't even know what a mental illness was, but when I was a kid, something wasn't right. Something wasn't right. I remember incidents in stores where she would scream like an animal because she wanted a dress instead of a pair of shoes if you pushed someone too much they would get sick and that combined with your genes is how you get depressed and that could be what happened to me then 15 you can tell something went wrong i mean life went off you know people say how can you tell if something is wrong with your child just look at his face my parents fled europe due to world war 2 but as soon as I was able to come back in 1986.

She was acting in Girls on top and the director was Ed. The days would go on and they should get more and more glamorous and then her breasts also changed in size. before he did it and they were obviously fake and I knew he liked me because while Dawn French was waving my fake breasts around Ruby was out front trying to do this trying to keep me from seeing them and then he took them out and buried them in a garden communal he was really normal and i thought i would need those jeans so i married him that's why when ed met my parents he realized why he might have depression they were horrible i'm not kidding they were horrible even for me they were very hard to deal with , basically they were incredibly damaged people it's like the castle of your dreams this is really the high end of having mental illness the first time I was admitted here I tried to drive here by myself I have no recollection of getting here I remember ending up in a bedding store and they knew something was wrong with me because I was holding a toothbrush in my pajamas it really gets here it's like it smells like safety like a baby's head oh here it is it's like powder for babies, can you smell it? the penthouses are up here which was just the Plano vanilla slump bars in the windows like you're gonna jump from the first floor oh yeah this is the way no and all the anorexics um left their food there and we used to. steal it and then they'd say thank you this was my flat no thought here i am why would you go to the mirror why would you brush your teeth by yourself you can't imagine, you can't imagine what's going on here it's just madness it's just like old times , you know where they used to bang their heads against the wall, but now you know they all wear nice clothes and there's no talk of cocktails here. no silly talk about the weather or do you know where you got your shoes this is tough Talk straight to the heart i worship god when i was here i wasn't in this condition you know to be like that but now i'm so normal i'm well aware of luck i was able to stay here believe me it was

only

because i had

health

insurance hosting movies for a website while i was still living at The Priory they called me and said if i wanted to do it and i said yes but i was here so i pretended not nothing happened and then i went home and interviewed people pretending i was normal. my husband would bring me back here but he wouldn't say i had a mental illness how strange we also hid my depression from our three kids i didn't want them to bother the kids she was sick but you also kept it quiet for professional reasons and personal, we didn't know anything about what was going on because our father used to lie to us, which I'm a bit like, but that's what was protecting us, what's your little horse's name if? you're a single mom you have no choice if i have a forehead a beard like Ed's he could stand up I don't know why you would scare your kids like that when they're too little but there's a certain point where you say um well mommy go on being mommy but mommy has a thing when she told us we have depression i thought ok then her eyes turn like this when she's not as funny as when she has really dark thoughts even when i finally told my family i never planned to do it public because I was still very embarrassed, but then I agreed that a mental health charity could use my photo.

I stood in front of him thinking, well that's the

only

one and then when I came down the tube there was another one and they were all over London and I was mortified because I was worried I'd never work again. He was so smart. of her to just embrace that and be like okay I'm going to be whatever then I'm going to stop probably out of panic I wrote the show Judith Owen made the music and together we toured mental institutions for over a year I would like to thank the makers of lamotrigine, sertraline and raboxetine great stuff because without those few simple chemicals i wouldn't be vertical today it was at The Priory where they knew how to make me the perfect antidepressant cocktail this was my doctor who saved me mark can we come in?

Did you ever think that we would see this day again? Welcome back. Hi thanks. I know that usually it's not like going back to a hotel. you're Ruby that's the first page of your story with me that's the first time we've met December 1993 Visual distortion anxiety sadness look at all my meds you had all the classic symptoms of depression you know your mood was obviously low you were tearful but almost that wasn't the most prominent thing you had a kind of total anhedonia nothing you knew would normally give you pleasure or pleasure was doing so the physical nature of depression as illness is so real and yet people don't sees her When I was a neurologist, I used to treat people with various things, including locked-in syndrome.

Your only communication with the world is blinking, nothing else and those patients. loved life I did not want to die you see someone with depression the outside has everything and wants to die wanted to kill myself you certainly had thoughts I think I don't think you really wanted there was enough of how you stay there but you were very aware of those thoughts is that the mental pain it's more distressing than physical pain it's a thousand times more distressing a thousand physical pain is nothing compared to, you know, five minutes with real depression carrying the disease above all it takes over every part of your brain takes over your body you can measure everything kind of physical changes in people with depression in the body and yet people say pull yourself together oh yeah when you're lying on that bed and you can't move it would be great like Alcoholics Anonymous to have a friend tell you don't kill yourself today don't mate today this will happen because that's really what helps at the end of the show I always say you can come back after the interval and have a discussion and the audience always comes back if I've taken my clothes off they can take my clothes off and then it's real, it's a real exchange at the end of a show this really really kind of harsh you know up north guy stood up and said i've been on antidepressants for the last 10 years and i never tell my wife and while his wife she is sitting next to him so i want people to speak up not only in theaters but in workplaces to really break the stigma but first i need a psychiatrist i have decided before i talk to other people to be open about his condition i spoke to an expert so i've gone to prof denise bugra who has more initials after her name than anything i've ever seen she's an M.A and MSC and mbbs and frcp a phd i can't even and now she's even a CB what E A CBE?

What do you think about me arguing with uh people who should talk about their mental illness? I personally think it's a really cool thing to do and I think more people are acknowledging and opening up about their experiences and mental illness. It would be better. Do you feel like momentum is building right now? 30 years ago, people were talking about the c-word they never talked about. cancer, so I think we're getting to that level, but there's a lot of pressure for people to recognize that, well, you know mental illness is treatable. doing your job properly you didn't say about my knighthood you know if I'm doing this I'm very glad that I'm supporting this idea because most of the people who came to see my show said we have to stop the stigma because this mental illness is the ultimate taboo so what i have to do is find three brave high flyers prepared to speak so i tweeted if you are successful in your business and suffer from mental illness would you speak? about that on TV, wow, I misspelled TV.

I want to try to find three successful entrepreneurs who actually have the nerve and are brave enough to tell their colleagues that they have mental illness. If I can do that, that would be right. Someone just answered. to my tweet we have someone named charlotte for the show oh she is so hot. I don't think we should use it. You see what I mean. Charlotte fentelli, 28, from Dorset, is amazing. -old son my family is my world she is the main earner and runs her own online magazine business from her home Charlotte has obsessive-compulsive disorder known as OCD I probably wash my hands 25 times a day and there was a time where I did between 60 and 100.

I can feel what I've touched. I can feel the germs on them. I see sparkling clean. Ah, that's a good sign. Charlotte has just been hired for a new part-time position as a marketing executive, which means she has to address one of her biggest fears of working in an office alongside new colleagues who don't know a thing about her Condition Are Not Their Doors I've never I've been here because I wouldn't submit to that and since I really had to and haven't yet, I would Don't touch the kettle handle. I think those are just a health hazard waiting to happen.

I have no idea what's inside these cabinets. Might be a new staff member there from what I know. I have no idea about you. you have to use wipes yeah you keep wipes in your bag or gel yeah let's see guys ok what kind of wipes do you want to have a variation? you wear disposable gloves you're only at gas stations I was agrophobic for a good few months I didn't go out at all so what was going on in your head is clear yes very scary very scary I mean it was. having 20 30 panic attacks a day i mean i lived 15 years of my life in fear charlotte confided to me that she was abused as a child i think more than anything in the world i just want to be clean yes i can't yes however i know you will never feel clean but i hope one day being abused as a child can make someone more vulnerable to developing mental health issues i think it is amazing that considering what she has been through charlotte has agreed to explain her condition to her colleagues, CharlotteIt's amazing because most people wouldn't survive that so I almost feel like if they dare to know that they treat her badly or I, I, I would take care of them, you don't survive something like that, you know God bless her, He still has to clean his hands and from what's happened in his life, I'm surprised he's not out there with a knife, so I hope they do. you're good to her because she can't take any more pain most of us are stressed these days life is too hard it's too fast it's too full of fear it would be great if i could find someone who is working in a high-risk environment pressure oh i think i found the most perfect person on my email he is a chef and runs a really successful restaurant in london a chef there is nothing more stressful than johnny mountain 42 started working and at 16 years. and now he has his own restaurant in the heart of westminster that's amazing my life changed years ago when a man came up to me and said young man i must say it was the best meal i ever had this little brain i took it as the Biggest affirmation I've ever had.

The English Pig has been open for two years and Johnny employs seven full-time staff. Please the testosterone in the kitchen is unbelievable it's very macho so there's no time for finesse No time for sensitivity No time for emotion The only emotion found in many kitchens it is fear. Johnny is just so passionate about his family. He and his wife Mangri have two four-year-old children. Harry, 6, and Lily, 6, are funny, loving, angry, um, crazy like a lot of people. Johnny is reluctant to discuss his mental health issues with his GP. A few months ago, he suddenly had a very public breakdown.

Great British menu was the turning point for me. I thought I was going to win. It was the most innovative dish I've ever made and he gave me two out of ten and I was devastated my whole world shattered the moment that came out of his mouth it all came crashing down. I've talked about it before about not being able to breathe and not being able to talk or walk or communicate and that's exactly what he did. It took everything out of me from the biggest thing I've ever been involved with I walked away from it it's a well produced show and the competitors know the critics can be harsh that's why Johnny blames himself for losing it publicly and when I got out and i kicked the doors open all i saw in front of me was this six foot picture of me staring at me on the wall and i looked at it oh i screamed and grabbed all over the side it was on a fomax board a piece of plastic . almost and i remember i tore it and smashed it and kicked it around the studio and when i got home i fell into my wife's arms and cried myself out it just got worse and the problem is our smart guy i keep saying i'm a smart guy, well , I thought about suicide and how would I do it idiot I thought about suicide such a stupid thing now Johnny wants to tell his staff about his recent accident and suicidal thoughts unless we share how the hell someone else is going to know you have a problem, but that's what I want to do with my staff.

I know it's like opening a big wound, really showing that I have a weak side, well I don't think it's a weakness for me, it's not. a weakness for me is a strength. I can't help it, but like Johnny, he means well, but given the last time he was on TV, he had a meltdown. I want to make sure he knows what he's doing. How will that help you? telling them that if I open up to my personal they will trust me more and therefore they will be able to open up to me and if they can open up to me they will get a bond they will get longevity you will be honest surely they must have known something was not right with you they always thought i was in the head you know i've been known if you write my name it comes up as eccentric or whatever i'm not eccentric i'm just wrong no you're not you're right but you have a little problem yeah thanks , so you have met your partner now with me, I know that I have always thought that yes, you are my people.

Thank you, I'm one of you, yes you are Shall we join Hanson, yes we hug now? the uk is currently not getting any treatment and then my husband found me and took me to The Priory we had some insurance money so I could stay for an hour now i will introduce you to the star of the staff here at the briary this is the man most eccentric I've ever met in my life. You can't believe this loss. Unbelievable that he is so crazy. Derek, get ready for this. she was there in class and the whole funny part was she just went right into it it was absolutely unnatural it was natural the nerve to make salsa when people are like that this is what made it this is what it's so much fun because you have a lot of this feeling like this when he comes here you have a lot of English like this English I'm being fourth I don't want to do this the medic what's wrong with you ah okay here we are Go one, two, four seconds this is for people who are sick with the head but no these are just amazing and i tell you what if someone is down or depressed or something. up is under the illusion that we feel better after volunteering he is a 30 year old design engineer also named Derek who works for Stanley Black and Decker one of his team designs has just been nominated for a national

award

wow what is this which is actually is a little vacuum ok believe it or not so this is the handle you lift up oh how cool this is perfect for people with OCD and then you vacuum yeah and then you have to be a little person yeah your little people can use i love it great for kids its perfect for everyone who has an obsession with dirt and then this is great oh that's good that's good Derek has depression and suffered a particularly bad episode ago 12 months from the outside I guess it would look like I was the luckiest man alive, but in reality it was probably the lowest I'd ever felt.

I just thought that's how everyone felt and everyone else seems to move on and I just couldn't deal with it it was so hard for his wife Catherine naturally you start to think did I upset him if I did something wrong you think I might as well What you can do is walk away from everyone and not put them through what you're going through. really horrible the taxi would think it should leave horrible one in 10 people in britain will experience depression in their lifetime luckily derek found out what was wrong with him and knowing it is part of the cure to finding out there was something wrong if it was a relief to be honest because then you know it's not right and there's something you can do to fix it. this so I don't understand why just because you have something wrong once in a while they should stop you from working or knowing or even there should be a stigma because this guy you know is at the Design Museum and he's won. an

award

is really not not right Derek's bosses have been very supportive he had four weeks off but when he went back to work he didn't tell his colleagues that he was worried about how they would react and if he would still feel part of the team I think Derek's a really cool guy, you know I really like him and he's incredibly brave, but I'm a little worried because, well, he says he's the only breadwinner in the family, you know it seems like every other mentally ill celebrity shows up every week. at least it makes you aware but you know how we are going to break the stigma we need everyone to come out so I am supporting three High Flyers who want to tell their work colleagues about their mental conditions today the chef and restaurant owner Johnny, plan to sit down with your staff and tell them about your recent breakdown.

I specially built these gates to open like this part of breaking down that barrier, didn't I? It's about letting everyone see what it's about. about how he got to crisis point he hopes they can come to him with their problems alan tommy come here big boy i have something to tell you what time you get home ernie nine o'clock 10 me i have this quiet side i never felt i could share before . This happened to me recently after the competition. It hit me so hard that I wanted to sell my business. I wanted to escape. I just wanted to. run away and it was very difficult and i really contemplated suicide but i tell you what from now on we are going to start sharing it's ok i guarantee one thing if you share it it will start to cool down and calm down and the problem i guarantee a shared problem is a problem and that's what's okay for a lot of people, it's probably some kind of personal private thing that they wouldn't share with anyone at work, but you know it's something that's necessary Sometimes it's not to keep you from spilling over.

It's hard to see Johnny Mountain, um, the mountain in that position, but I mean, I guess I have to give my heart to him like he goes that far emotionally. but he backs off. I could have exposed myself almost like my retriever lays on my back exposing everything and that's showing me confidence and that's what I've shown my staff, well Johnny has done what he set out to do, his staff really respect him. and they're really relieved because now they feel like maybe if they had something wrong they could say so I've noticed people feel so much better when they come clean about their mental illness and there's no reason to be ashamed because some really amazing people have had it too he's so amazing Churchill he obviously had a lot on his mind he was running a country he suffered from depression he called the black dog he used to say every time a train went by he felt like he had to back up behind pillars i mean thats really a description of depression.

It amazes me that this guy was the hero of WWII and yet he suffered, so he shows that you know you can do both. Desperation runs a country tackling discrimination against people with mental illness. the House of Commons agenda so far Dr Sarah Willison MP Dr Sarah Williston recently spoke publicly about her depression in a bid to change the law I know what it's like and I'm sure there are plenty of other members of this health and listening and following this discussion today you will know exactly what it feels like to feel like your family would actually be better off without you I didn't do anything in my house what exactly are you trying to change now basically if you've been sectioned under the mental health law for more than six months, you can't be a director of a company, you can't be a deputy, you can't be a school governor, I can't be right, so all kinds of professions and jobs are prohibited for you just because you've had what I consider to be a normal experience as a part of life, you can have anything else for six months and you're allowed to come back, but mental illness, well, it's all kinds of things, I mean, you could have been in prison and go back but you know you shouldn't you couldn't ok he has to go foreign so prejudice against mentally ill people is currently written into the law no wonder there's a stigma.

Former Defense Minister Kevin Jones is also taking a stand. Now, Mr. President, I am going to throw away my notes because I have felt very bad about this. They start talking. my own mental health issues that's the first time i've talked to anyone in my family what i'm saying today i don't really know what i'm going to say because like a lot of men what you do is try and deal with it yourself you don't talk to people and I just hope you realize my speaker what I'm saying is very hard for me now I also think we're wired to think that somehow if you admit fault or fail you're going to be, uh, you know, seen from a dismissive manner both in terms of the electorate and your peers, which clearly took some guts, especially since I used to be defense minister, which must be as stressful as any job. ya like them and luck would have it turns out to be derek constituency deputy kevin kevin hi this is derek hi derek jacob you yeah i want derek to talk to him while he decides whether to follow in his footsteps so has there been any Negative experience since you spoke no it's been too positive but if there is I don't care no we're not really looking for sympathy you know we're looking for understanding about the situation but you know if people take a negative review I think it's his loss I guess the things bigger than me What worries me is people treating me differently and not being given the opportunity to do the job that I can do yes but I think a part of you showed that it's really just doing the work you did before, you're no different than when you were before you told people you have depression so you know what the difference is, most people don't change their opinion of you, like Derek Charlotte also thinking about how her colleagues will respond when she tells him about her condition this all seemed really cool on paper and now I just don't want to do it she has her own online publishing business supporting other people with mental health issues but now she has also taken on a role as an executive ofmarketing for a tech company and wants to tell his new colleagues about his OCD when starting a new job, obviously you'll never see your positives.

I don't want them to think that it will affect the way I do my job. I don't want your pity. I don't want them to change the way they see me. get up i put on my mask i come to work and that's who i want to be and now i'm going to take my mask off and it's really scary great i'm here to see you for sure you're upstairs lovely thank you hugely nervous so i didn't think i would be nervous as a part of his new role. Charlotte is in charge of a huge product launch party.

What her colleagues don't know is that she finds it difficult to shake hands with strangers and she believes that the flags are microbes. mounted, the reason why people are filming today is because, um, I suffer from OCD, the reasons why, um, maybe I don't shake hands or open doors and do that kind of thing, so it's an aspect of My life yes, I don't. I don't want to have to hide or feel ashamed from all of you, you know I work in mental health too, but did you think it was just some kind of profession instead of a?

I really didn't think it was OCD I don't know all right now we're on all our errands yeah we're not going to treat you anything of course not but only yes it's like we should be aware if I can ask a probably immature keep it going so if i get to the house and open your kitchen cabinets yeah with all the beans and stuff to line up oh bless no no no that's a different kind of OCD that's a perception, um, to me, it's a form of contamination and germs, uh, it's really Hard to believe that you know you look at Charlotte and think that God has everything you know that she's very beautiful and has a great job and a great husband and underneath that is all that abuse that always catches me off guard when I catch up with Charlotte it was clear that telling her colleagues had left her feeling relieved.

I think I look very nervous. Look me in the eyes. I look like a rabbit in the headlights. I made them understand that I can seem like a pretty tough cow. You know, I want people to open doors for me. I wouldn't drink stuff. you thought he wouldn't respect you or maybe he doesn't just respect you but he really likes you oh what are you saying? God help me, are you saying that we hope Charlotte's colleagues will support her during her big launch party in Durham? Derek is still deciding if it's a good idea to tell his coworkers about his depression.

One of the big problems caused by stigma is that because no one talks about it, people can't find out about treatments that work. no wonder suicide is the leading cause of death for men under the age of 35. part of the disease let me tell you is when you start hearing voices that are pretty negative and you know those voices i'm an idiot because i said why i screwed up yesterday i should have made that phone call i didn't make you i get nowhere the only way i i'm living life with clinical depression it's because i'll listen to the early thumping so i can do things so it's not so agonizing studying here for a master's degree in the latest treatments for depression here at oxford university i brought derek to meet one From my teachers Professor Mark Williams in depression what we see is the mind doing the best it can to try to solve a problem except it solves it by trying to think and often in life that's exactly what it does. we need it's just we've had so much training and thinking and we've used our head for things the mind doesn't know what to do when thinking actually doesn't work anymore it just redoubles its effort to think overthinking yeah what I've learned is that by being aware of my thoughts and feelings, I get early alerts when I'm heading towards stress or depression and then I can take action and realize what's going through your mind right now. one of the people oppression The results called mindfulness are so incredible that it is now prescribed on the NHS.

It is a form of mental training that allows people to recognize their thinking. Gather your attention and focus it on the sensations of the breaths. you are doing to open up to your co-workers. I think if it wasn't for someone opening up to me, I might never have known that I had depression, so it's going to be hard, but I think it's the right thing to say. telling people to hopefully help anyone else who is suffering now or may suffer in the future. I really like Derek, I mean who couldn't and I really love the fact that he's doing it to help other people.

He's so brave meanwhile. get behind it charlotte product launch party is about to start thank you so much for coming to our amazing launch party tonight we are launching a fantastic new product hope you all enjoy the night launch party night was a really wonderful night because my team around me knew the difficulties I was facing and they were there to support me telling them that it was the best thing that I could have done it is almost like they have lifted a stone because you carry that and you always think what is that other person going to say how are they going to me to judge?

Am I different from them? But she has told us and we accept it anyway. some overseas handshakes so what started as an accident when i became the poster girl for mental illness has skyrocketed here is where we are at now can y'all see? I didn't set out to say I'm going to write it. I make a joke. a show so i can be the you know our saint of mental illness people started talking to me in the audience and saying i'm devoid i don't know what to do i don't know what i am medication is this are my people i feel at home with them because we understand each other we can talk treatments drugs and how hard it is to get out of bed one in four of us has a mental illness but the numbers are increasing the achievement i am most proud of is what i have done at home one thing i want to achieve in my life that i wouldn't pass up so i did it very consciously and the fact that i pulled it off is probably the best thing i've ever done when i cut the pancake the flower got in my face to go mom we really root for her she she's so dedicated to this if she wasn't supposed to go out i'm so proud of her for this because she's doing something that she really cares about i know my mom wishes she wasn't known but i said i think that makes you who you are without this, you would not be sick, okay, yes, she is terribly cocky today.

Who are you without me pushing anyone? down shut up now it's true one two sounds good i can't believe it's actually tonight i'm a bit nervous now i've come to Derek's local pub in Durham he's invited all his mates out for after work drinks and i'm going to perform part of my show I never thought she would come to the Northeast after seeing Ruby's show and seeing what she had done. I got really inspired and felt this was a good way to get my experiences out so other people could benefit from them I hope he makes it I hope he doesn't pass out with anxiety I think he'll be fine he's a great guy please put your hands together What I did was a year and a half tour and I went to mental institutions, bipolar people used to come up to me and leave.

I laughed, I cried, I'm nervous to tell people, especially on such a large scale, because you don't know how other people are going to react. a disease invisible to anyone else, there will be people who do not understand, so here is my question How come all other organs in your body can get sick and you get sympathy except the brain? There's someone else in this room who would like to share his story with you, this is very difficult for him, but I'd like to bring it up now, so, um, Derek Muir, could you come in here, could you come out?

Derek would like to tell you why he took some time off, um, so I'm going to pass you the microphone ok thanks Dara oh ok thanks hi I don't know if anyone has noticed a change in me since last year um if you have it's because I I found out that I had depression and I have been lucky enough to catch it early and do something about it, the problem is that if you don't know that there is something wrong, you don't know that there is something to fix and I didn't know it until someone pointed out and mentioned their problems. experiences with me and I identified with them and that was really the first step so the reason I wanted to tell everyone is because talking about it and knowing other people feel the same way is the key to getting over it that's why I'm doing this with Derek for like 18 months or so and obviously never, uh, never had any ideas, so he's really good at hiding it, but I don't think he's any different from them, right?

I knew I was going to tell everyone huh yeah yeah I didn't know she was going to stand up front that's awesome I'd like to say I'm so proud of them I think it turned out well I'm glad I did done. I hope this has done something for other people. Greetings. I didn't feel like he was Brave. Someone was Brave and spoke to me. So I'm just returning that favor. I think by letting go of my lovely people who work with me. that it will give them a chance to let me go and then i can help them whatever it is people think you are weak because you have a mental health problem most of the people i have met who have a mental health problem are some of the strongest people i've ever met you know they're your doctor your lawyer your cleaner your friend we're changing the world we're changing diapers we're writing business plans and we're making a difference the people on this show are braver than i ever was.

I would never have told anyone what they are doing. I take my hat off to them. You have to be very brave to admit that something is wrong, but the more people do it, the more chance we have of breaking up. the stigma