Middle School Class President

how much of this private

school

for a few years and on campus they had kindergarten through high

school

and when I was 13 I had to wait after school for my parents to pick me up so they hired me to wait at a One day I started I walked around the school and I saw where the kindergarteners and first graders had nurseries on the playground and I thought, you know what I should go fight these kids with? I don't know why that was the first thought that came to mind. head, it wasn't a real fight, okay, it was a play fight, relax, but I just walked to the door, open it, teachers have seen me in schools, they know I go there and I would just start play fighting, this It's the weird part that I loved. power of having like 15 kids attacking me I'm sure I was eliminating them all I'm not exaggerating I'm not lying I'm not kidding this was like a daily activity for me I never told anyone this I went in there like and you guys picked the wrong Day to rob a bank National City, come to me, Brown, I'm waiting for my parents to pick me up.

It seems like I just got home from fight club every day, so one day in real class, Miss Thompson gets up, so we have Bailey. have a class

president

to teach them about elections or some homeroom teacher, this is a job for your history teacher or something who wants to be trans

president

, we need to elect three people, so I in this power kick where I'm. raising my hair like anything else, plus there is a girl in my class, Jane, who I had a big crush on. Part of me wanted to impress her, she could be my little, my little first lady, so yeah, I raised my hand and Tina B and Jeremy W.

My cousin Shane was in my class with me, so I chose him as my vice president. Tina was chosen. Robin Jeremy. I don't think he even elected a vice president. I was just traveling alone and I honestly don't know. I was thinking, you know? He was right to lead a double life, but what he was trying to do was the equivalent of Batman running Wayne Enterprises fighting crime at night and then running for mayor. I didn't need all this stress the day before the election came around. Tina B comes here with powerpoints. and she graphics photos of girls kissing babies in third world countries a bra.

She totally took me by surprise by looking at this like this is cool or I just walked into an episode of West Wing. I'm very confused, so the teacher looks. to me, okay, why is it your turn and I guess I'll go up there. I'm going to make sure that we have less homework and that we all, yes, yes, less homework, first of all, second of all, two-hour lunches. You also vote for me. Everyone here gets free puppies. I had the The kids in my class were so nervous. Oh, PD sent the SWAT team. Alright. Hi Jeremy, you want to get up there and say anything.

Mm-hmm, you'll just let Tina go up and kiss Haitian babies, and you won't. I'm not going to do anything about it mm-hmm dad, they practically promised a four day weekend. Don't feel like a little pop. You're not going to do anything to let you know throughout this entire campaign that I'm running for "No." I don't really flirt much with Jane because I'm trying to stay focused you don't play I'm playing hard to get the teacher to get up in front of the class okay I skipped breakfast I'm getting a little cranky I'm going to go to Chic-fil-a, everyone write a name on a piece of paper, pass it around when you get back, I'll count it, whatever I do, I walk out and then Jane taps me on the shoulder and I imagine she's about to say, "Okay, Mack, I'm going to vote for you, since I'm bigger, she's pretty much the same, touching the shoulder, and I ask her, what can you, can you, can you touch Sean for me, please Sean is that light? ". skinned-guy who sits in front of me is six feet tall in sixth grade I don't understand how I don't know what hormone pills he's taking anyway Sean turns around How about Jane dates a Sean?

You'll be my boyfriend? What do you want to be my girlfriend? Yeah, okay, tonight, buddy, the teacher counts the votes where the class president, the minute I got it, didn't even want it, not even because the whole Jane situation, right, I walk up to the teacher. and I say. goal I don't want to retire from my presidency I can't deal with all the stress you know I have a full-time job Part-time job School bills Kids' car payment I have all the things to worry about I can't I'll be dealing with new things responsibilities on my plate right now, okay, so when I resigned, Shane became interim president.

Shane felt the power for about five minutes and then said, "I quit." Jeremy, the one who put the least amount of work into all of this is done. being the president is like the guy who does the least amount of work on the group project and gets to Germany, the only real winners in this were Jeremy and Shaun, let's be clear, but yeah, that's it, thanks for coming to listen to my TED. talk