Live Your Truth: An Honest Conversation with Charlamagne Tha God and Pete Davidson

really strong and powerful and some of those beautiful, cool people have a meter that, oh, I think that's a misconception. true, some people think that when you go into rehab it's always for drugs, yeah, but it's not always for drugs, I don't always mean, and what do I do with drugs at all, but I'm not like falling in on myself and everything that I have, as some people do. It's sad that some people work and figure things out and the beautiful thing about rehab is that it gets you sober so they can figure out what the problem is.

Some people may smoke marijuana and drink when they go out. It's like you just have. be sober for a certain period of time so they could diagnose you correctly, have you been sober long enough for them to do so? Yeah, I went to two places because one place went a little bit off or like you know how to start The people there, so we went to another place, we had like two and a half weeks of total sobriety and that was great and they readjusted me and I I have felt very good, how do you know when it is time to go get help?

Alright? I'm doing too much, usually you want to start like cutting or when it gets just a little bit insurmountable or like people say, hey, my friends will tell me no, we're at a point where people will come and be Hey, you have to Justin is all terrified today, we didn't pass, but we're all worried, so you should go. I have a good group around me every time they make a cut. It looks like I cut my chest. I'm sorry that's why I started getting tattoos all over my chest it's so I like them all it's like a release it's kind of like if you can't get a tattoo or if you can't it's never anywhere like that.

Seriously, it's like whatever, you're so manic and annoying sometimes, that's the only thing that would work for me, but now I like that you go to rehab, you learn like, oh, you could take a cold shower, you could do exercise. you can listen to very loud music, you can read this excerpt, you can access the communication app, you can call a friend, you can wait five minutes, you know so many things that you learn, that's like eating

your

brain if you manage to do any of those things like that what I mean, you know, that's how I've been taking care of him, did the cutting bring any relief like oh yeah, amazing, well, I mean, you know it's not amazing, no, it's not, it's not amazing or I like it the feeling after you just feel really stupid afterwards, but while you're doing it it feels really cool, it's like you're being labeled, so you think you're trying to equalize, I guess, physical pain, emotionally, yeah, I'm really angry and upset and It feels really good to just poke

your

self or get a tattoo or like you know, I need you to get into boxing, Pete, I know everyone says you have to quit cigarettes first, you should remake Fight Club, yeah, so you can.

I just hinted or something, yeah, I love it, it was amazing. I saw that movie for the first time three years ago and no one ruined the ending for me and it blew my mind. Did you avoid my important finale, a Fight Club? Don't know. I was very lucky that it was just one of those movies, you know, there's like a movie, you know, yeah, like I know I have to see the Godfather one, but it's never going to happen, but Fight Club was one of those for me that I thought about , Yeah. I'm really impressed with what you're doing in the Space Man movie.

I don't think I ever had the privilege of seeing a couple of things before they came out in a big way. Adolescence. No, what did that mean to you? Mainly excited about Jason Worley, he wrote it, he directed it and he's just brilliant, he's a genius, he's so famous and he worked so hard and put together a great cast and gave me a chance, he literally saved my career because the movie came along. out or at Sundance at a really crucial shitty moment in my life and I really owe a lot to it and it's like a really cool movie, I really feel like it's going to be a hit with the high school and college crowd.

I feel like it's a movie you can watch with your kids, it's like one of those nostalgic flakes that come out on Hulu, just Hulu in theaters on the 13th during a Hulu week on the 20th, which made you want to take your time and choose the right movie. to do because I'm sure in the last few years you could have done important roles and every damn movie that was coming out was what made you say this is what I want to do on my first meeting or like I said. I have a great team around me.

I have a lot of people who say, “You know,” just wait for the right one. You want to be like our house watching Netflix and be like, “Oh, you know,” or just be whatever you don't want to be. be there because that's forever so I'm very lucky that I was able to do stand-up and have other jobs here and there and I just waited and I was very lucky that there were two really good ones. projects we have to do, I guess, and how being in the spotlight complicates any mental health issue. Oh, it's horrible, that's why I can't have internet.

It's just the worst when people you know don't have that great skin all the time. At that point I think I guess I can't go out, otherwise they'll call me a crackhead for three weeks. You know, I mean, so you know, I shouldn't care about that. How would you feel if someone called you German? It is really annoying. I have a family and they follow my family and it really makes me feel bad. It really takes me a lot of time. Do you remember how I felt before you got into the industry, before I got into the industry, I just wanted to get on stage more than anything, yeah, and I just wanted to be a part of something.

I never thought it would reach this level and I never really wanted it to. I always wanted to be like a donkey or like Mullane, not that I'm not saying I'm half as fun as those guys, but I would really love their careers and I love their track record mm-hmm, but you know, I have You know, the jump was started by Ariana and you know when you're put in front of that kind of audience and that kind of lifestyle it's like those people try so hard, give yourself a little more credit than that yeah you had it.

You had a name before you knew I wasn't going to SNL. I did, but I'd be silly if I didn't like, you know, at least acknowledge that there was a significant push, it was like women did it all the time, hey, man, I was. I was like doing your thing like I'm just your cheerleader now like I want everyone to do well. I never understood wanting people to like to fail all the time, you know, I mean, you think the entertainment industry increased the intensity of your mind. illness, that's why I asked you how you felt before, oh yes, your career has made it much worse.

I'm a lot more insecure, a lot more insecure about myself than I've ever been and yeah, it's like I'm also kind of embarrassed, it's like embarrassing, right, because you have to walk right and like Dee, I don't read everything, but I don't know everything. there are out there and then there are these people who come up to you and what are they thinking? What are they or some people doing and my is this guy who is going to run up and sing me a song? It's this Guiness guy seriously, they don't have it, yeah, all the time at the games, I just have to sit there, just watch the Knicks, just someone on their socks, you're not going to lie, you know, it's a lot to me. like to be able to go out, I have to plan it like before, I didn't have to do that, I used to say hey, yeah, let's go to this place. like now I have to say hey maybe we could do that tomorrow if XY and Z work out yeah when you asked me to go to a game I said do you really want to go sit on the court the same way?

I'm sitting there, that's something I'll never let them take away from me because I grew up watching the Knicks, sitting there bleeding from my nose, happy as a clam and I just like being able to sit so close to bring your guys and all that. It's amazing so I won't let them know you think you've ever hit rock bottom oh yeah I hit it all the time you taught me right you're not going to take my rock model it's when people are afraid of my life and I have to leave and then I have to recover again, so I think I've hit it a few times and you know, as long as you're surrounded by good people who support you, you should be able to do it, you know that and I'm a fish, I don't know if you can get out of it .

How does it look? What is the rock bottom? It looks like the PD. It's usually like you're eating too many mushrooms and a little too much. a lot of acid and I just like to have too much fun and not sleep, not take good care of myself and then when you don't sleep and you're mentally ill and you're doing all this, it's like it's just, I think for the lady and she called it rocket fuel and you're taking your meds and this whole mix of everything you're getting you go a little crazy and I was on Accutane for a while trying that maybe I shouldn't so it's just very manic and very insomniac what's that supposed to do to you?

Will you like that which contains accutane? If you take it for about six months it permanently eliminates acne forever, but it drives you crazy for about six months and when you mix nuts with nuts I thought I would cancel it. they're out, it did, I was multiplying it and I got a little wild, you still fight well of course you do, but how often do you still fight depression, oh I'm always depressed all the time, I have to constantly get out of it . like I woke up depressed but like I was fine, now I know my steps because I learned from reality, like now I have to go out and be in the sun for a while or go for a walk or start the day this way. it's all just programming you to trick your brain you know what you're suicidal yeah all the time but I can't because I have a mom and a sister or I like a family so I've always been suicidal but I never had balls , you know, I'm very lucky, like the first time, maybe when I left this time.

I felt like maybe I almost had balls because it's starting to get like you know when you're not feeling well. and you're going through all this stuff and there are people at your house on Staten Island who are really judgmental and crazy, well yeah, but they're not, they're not as consistent as they used to be, your job? It doesn't make you feel better It's the only thing I love I love writing I love hanging out with my friends They're all very funny and cool and serious And yes, it's the ultimate distraction The ultimate distraction I didn't think we could like it D popularize drug use among the inflated ones like for someone who is dealing with problems that you may have why do you always have to go and run yourself medicate how can we prevent that from happening?

Oh like everybody like how weeds just get cold and all that or not necessarily mainly we like prescription pills that's bad that stuff is really bad you can't play with it oh man I know rappers have a big influence, I think, like anyone with a voice, just saying hey, that's not cool, hmm, like me. Personally, I can't say I don't take them because I have anxiety. I take klonopin on flights and ships. I like not to overuse things and it's just not fun. You should smoke marijuana. I wish there was a public service announcement. like just smoking weed instead of just they know, oh yeah, it's just smoking weed, that's all, you can have it for fun, you know all that stuff, but those oxys in our shed that I've seen like I was young.

Am 26 years old. there were some kids in that other one like in rehab like 18 19 let it look like 40 from there not that it's not a joke and I mean you see all these rappers that you know overdose it's horrible they're all like 20 years old it's terrible I guess I wish that was enough of an example, but I guess you know what they want, that's when you hang out with Ariana and you know that Mag passed away, yeah, and she was openly grieving, yeah, in a real way, like I would. . I have to love my soulmate in my life Hello, yes, how did that affect you?

I totally understood because we were only together because of a woman, she even told you this as if she were me. I was like, listen, I was like, I get it, do whatever you want. I will be here? I literally said "I think I said I'll be here until you don't want me to be here. I think I knew it was over after that. I was really horrible and I can't." I can't imagine what that's like, it's just terrible, all I know is that she really loved it and she wasn't like, you know, putting on a show or anything, and I hope you know that I'm pressured by her family and all his friends, even though they're still all awake, you know, when his music comes out and he makes good music, it's horrible, now you have a joke and you're special in that special fluid, yeah, but oh well.

I don't even know if this is a joke, but I'll go to CK, yeah, and he supposedly tried to get you fired from SNL for smoking too much weed. Yes, it was a true story. Yes, it's a true story. I don't want to. like ruining the joke but pretty much how he likes to rat me out to my boss yeah it was so weird I never got over it with him personally claiming I think you'll see his comedic fall oh my god it was amazing it was amazing . I imagine that's what Ariana feels now if we just watched each other go down for two years saying yes, yes.

I'm sure it's very justified, but yeah, I thought well, I loved that guys who haven't been nice to a lot of people, so really yeah, he's not a good guy, well the thing is if something bad happens to someone and it'ssure in the movies it's crazy I imagine yeah I think I think I'm a huge red flag until you beat me really yeah just the perception of me like everyone I've ever met in Suicide Squad was like I thought you were going to be a giant piece of I was like, thanks, like you're actually a nice, cool guy, you know?

So I think I had this thing going around where I just look like a you know. piece of but you know, I don't, I don't think I realized that if he came up in the '80s and '90s, they would tell him not to talk about any of this, yeah, they would support him if he pretended to be someone. something that you're not right about, you know, I mean, like it's all fake, well, I don't want you to be on set and see me smoking weed and taking one and thinking, what is this business? You know, it's just what I do and you.

I know I hope you can understand that and we can work together. How much you care about the industry's opinions about your own stability. I don't care much what the industry thinks. It would be something learned from Sandman. You know they will love it. you or they will hate you no matter what it matters since your friends and family are in front of you that's what I really mean I really don't care I saw you in the Alexander Wayne campaign thank you very much owners up the end, like this and you said that you don't consider yourself a little out of line with the talent and that you wish you had a talent, do you really feel like you don't agree with that?

I feel like I have a good personality and I feel like like I care and I just like it, I'm not going to leave you and I think in this business, especially not in life, I'm not saying I'm the only one that's an

honest

person, I'm just saying than in the business we are in. that's disgusting, a meal is like when you know, I mean, they tell everyone to be

honest

, but then when you really like it, that's crazy, yeah, so it's definitely a dangerous thing to do, but like I'd like Have said. I prefer to be completely ahead.

I don't like surprises, so I don't want to surprise anyone else. I think man, you know, being a little bit frequent, being yourself with a talent in itself, especially being under so much. public scrutiny like you are like there was a time in your career where you felt like you know pressure to not be yourself uh yeah you know it well like it is you know a lot of times and events like it's like it should probably It reeks of weed or Like, you know, try to, you know, dress up or do that, so sometimes I try, you know, depending on what it is, but I try not to care anymore, it's only been the last two years that I've been like that. . a show that is so low on the list what made it that way is the consequences of relationships public relations is interesting mental health I think it's a mix of all of that I think there's a lot out there and I don't I don't know why anyone cares It matters, it's very strange to me, but yeah, it's definitely like moving away from AG and you know you like being in other relationships and you know you've been in and out of things.

I guess it's appealing to some, but yeah, just the following. I don't care as much about the writing as the next thing really bothers me, oh, let me do this in the, but like if they came to Staten Island, like if they came to my house, it's scary and the girls thought they were coming there. Stanton, they come to downtown Staten Island so I have a mom and a sister that I have a house with so it's hard it's really hard and I could see it on their faces and that sucks too so if it could be something like that Like my family, it would be kind to everyone, what do they give you security?

Or, what are you doing to avoid them? The house now is like I have a boy and you know, every time my mom has to go somewhere, we get them, you know, cars or whatever, but it's definitely scary, it's something to think about, especially after of what just happened. Yeah, that's just scary, scary. out there, so are you ready for the next level? Pete, you have a lot of Pete, you have a lot of things coming. Well, I don't know how to feel yet because he hasn't come out yet. I saw that I didn't like a part of my life.

It happened yet, but I'm definitely ready to like doing more houses and stuff and doing more stand-up. I really want to like that part. I think the problem for you is about the art, all the others are not just about the light that will be around you, it will be the heat that will be around you, yeah I'm out, I don't know if I'm ready for that. I'm going to have to do it. I'm taking media training classes, how do you ignore, I could turn into one of those sunglasses all the time people say oh yeah, do you think I'll actually think you'd do well.

I think it's just because people don't want to see how sad I actually used to be like yeah, I used to say wow, that guy didn't like me, but that guy was going through a hard time, yeah, yeah, if you look back, how is who he is and then sometimes you see a picture and your eyes are like that and you're like I'm wearing sunglasses you look in the mirror heart yeah I don't like how I look I get scared I don't have mirrors in my house what in my basement because I

live

in the basement and then my mom and my sister

live

upstairs and they have mirrors but I don't have mirrors there are no mirrors no it just doesn't work for me.

I had a really hard time in high school, so I still have PTSD. from that thing where they just picked on me in high school or something, oh, it was so confusing all the time because my dad had just died, so you'd think I'd be fake nice, but not in Staten Island, they don't You don't care Damn, it's old school, how do you stop running away from yourself? You can't live in a world without mirrors, right, right, I don't know, I don't know what I am, that's something I have. To work I have to do it.

I'm definitely working on trying to love myself more and be less insecure and I'm doing a lot of DBT therapy, which is a dialectical behavior that just breaks that, yeah, it's pretty much for people who have like mental illnesses and it teaches them steps to combat depressive feelings and things like that, and it's very helpful, so if you ever need help, you should check out DBT and CBT, which is a cognitive behavior, your CBT inactive, yeah, how much do you go to therapy? I go to people once a week so two sessions a week and yeah sometimes I'm just sitting there and just talking but you know it's always been helpful to me even though you do comedy you know you're right , you feel so?

Could it be that your calling is your calling? Also, I would like to be a therapist. I mean, I would have a mental health advocate because it's like you're living your life. Wow, well, no. I never look like that because it's too scary, but. I'm all for all awareness and you know anything I can do to help for sure. If there's anything I can do to help, there are definitely a lot of people who have it and that's it. It is definitely like that. a sledgehammer on your legs it's very hard to get out of bed, so if it can help someone, I'm all for it, you always know, you said a producer asked you how do we know if we're doing the right thing, and if it doesn't feel right then you know yes then you're doing the right thing working out doesn't really feel good when it feels like you're doing the right thing masturbate it feels good doing the wrong thing no, sometimes I'm wrong it's time of day whoa there are no apps that don't Instagram I can't send messages of text how on the wall I want you to do it I want you to be able to feel good without paying people that's what I want no no I also want you to always associate feeling good with the pain, right, no, I'm trying, I'm trying enjoy, it is with the fruits of your work, as I say, I am trying to be more, the thing is that I look, I want it to be like that.

So I think I need to go in with a different mindset. Yes, this will not only be painful. You know, I almost feel like you like breakups more than you probably like me in a relationship, just because you love pain so much. I definitely don't love breakups, but it definitely drives me to improve, to be better, so maybe, uh, maybe subconsciously, I'm very deep down. Should figure some of that out. You're going to stop dating famous girls. I'm not. dating for a while, I mean, unless I meet someone you know, the love of my life, I'll meet the love of your life every six months, yeah, I know, man, I know what you do, what can I say, I love it, I love it, I love it, but yeah.

I'm done with that. I'm going to try to stay away from that because it's a lot of, yeah, this is annoying and no one cares, you know, there's just articles with no clicks, so it's really weird. I feel better I guess being in a relationship I love it in a relationship you felt ugly so yeah I love being in a relationship I love doing things and Netflix and hanging out and I like going out to dinner I just love that It makes me very happy and it's also like an escape from normal life, when you have a partner, it's fun, yeah, I mean, it's like you meet your wife, with whom you can do all the good things and say all that, it's great. having like a lady around everyone has an opinion about Pete Davidson and what's good for Pete Davidson right?

What does Pete Davidson think is good for him? I think right now staying the course, you know, trying, not focusing on relationships or media or anything like that. I think you just know how to do what I'm doing, I just try to keep my head down, keep working and hopefully people see the work. I believe that actions speak louder than words. I love you man, I love you buddy, you've got the special coming up tomorrow. yes sir, what else should you take into account? Please go see Jason Orly and Griffin Gluck's Great Adolescence, everyone just crushed it and go see Uncut Gems, it's the best movie of all time and don't make these people do it to you. press just because they have to promote no, I said, I've been saying no to that whole week, yeah, you can get everything you need from this.

Any questions you guys have, I just want you to do the work and continue to work on yourself absolutely like you know, I love you brother, I love you too and what I want is, I want to see you here, I don't know what I want, I want to be in those baby showers and when you have that family, absolutely me, you and waxing, there you have it. dear friend let me do PDD thank you