If You Need Help Getting Unstuck, WATCH THIS! - Les Brown

It is my pleasure to be here tonight to ask you to join me in welcoming Les Brown to his third in a series of four classes. Les is one of the most inspiring motivational teachers in America today when I heard about him three years ago. It brought tears to my eyes and then I took one of my sons to introduce him to Les and my feeling was that every young person in America

need

s to listen to

this

man because if you could start young learning the kind of ideas that can put. through such a beautiful and enthusiastic way and so from the heart that it would change America and I knew when he was here before we had him back, you know how you know some things so I'm delighted to introduce you tonight.

You, Les Brown, good night, how are you doing? I'll ask you how you're doing. I want you to say better than good and better than most. How's it going? I appreciate the opportunity to share time with you again once you give Lenoir a round of applause please I am very supportive of

this

ministry I think Jack Poland is ahead of his time and people here show a level of concern in terms of empowering people and

help

ing them develop the skills that are necessary to navigate through some of life's treacherous waters is something that is sorely

need

ed tonight we are going to look at breaking through the deadlock I think some of you know what I mean , sometimes we have to wonder what is using my life.

I heard a guy give a lecture once where he said that we are today what we were when and he was talking about the fact that, to a large extent, we behave, we think, we react due to some previous experience. that we've had one of the things we know about life is that it's always changing sometimes you're up sometimes you're down sometimes things are going great and sometimes they're not sometimes you're happy and sometimes you're sad now what's that thing called life and when we begin to understand and we know that by accepting that reality that we will never ever have things that will just kill all the time but you're going to have some ups and downs and you're going to have some downs but during those lows that's where growth occurs that's where work is there anyone can feel good when they are healthy their bills are paid they have happy relationships the kids are acting normal the business is successful anyone could be positive then Anyone can have a bigger vision than anyone can have faith in those kinds of circumstances.

I am right? I see, but the real challenge, the real challenge of mental, emotional and spiritual growth, comes when you get knocked down. Someone said adversity presents a man to himself or a woman how you handle it that's where growth happens when I was facing some challenges a guy said something to me and I suggest this is one of the first things you want to do when you're facing a challenge you want to get

unstuck

assess where you are

watch

it assess yourself assess yourself and assess the situation what got you there what role you played earl nightingale had a saying i like said we are all self made but only the successful will admit it What has brought you to this point?

You learned? Are you learning something? Are you doing it over and over again? Did someone say that insanity is doing the same thing in the same way? Expect a different result. or you're growing through it you're bigger and better because of it because it's not going to leave you until you grow through it i was going through a big challenge in my life that was wearing me down that was using me and one of my students told me in a class that i was teaching lessons and the truth said less until you handle it with grace it will stay in your face um and it stayed there a long time the challenges of life how we got it how we got stuck a friend of mine went through a divorce my best friend had a wife who did not love him as much as he loved her it was this first true true love he was a very religious man he did not believe in divorce he was wrong and he paid for his mistake with a lot of pain, many tears and it came to a point where he knew he should have gotten divorced but he was stuck he was stuck on something called Revenge he said she made me so miserable I'm going to take it back to him he was stuck and he stayed there longer than he should because he started attacking him, it began to affect him psychologically and as a result, when he finally got divorced, he took the same attitude to other relationships looking for something to go wrong he was so burnt out he didn't want to risk pain again he was in a relationship trying to avoid the pain when he got too close he did something to make sure the relationship didn't work he was always trying to find something is wrong with the person because they are not perfect people so if you look for it you can find it he was stuck in revenge another friend of mine working on a He loved the job very much the company hoped to retire there and one day they call him at the office, ask everyone for his badge and ID, the security man came into his desk and told him that he was fired and had to leave, then he was devastated and yes approached him, he would tell him his story like all of us. i have stories thank you even when he got a job he went to work telling anyone who would listen how he got unfairly fired and always ended up saying it wasn't fair life isn't fair life just isn't fair birds eat worms and they do, so we could, we can't even deal with what's in there, but he's caught up in the fact that it's not fair, I don't deserve that they were wrong, I used to be a state legislator in Columbus, Ohio, during the recess that we used to have. go out on the front lawn of the ohio statehouse and the capitol there and

watch

the people walk by there was one person in particular we all knew the grown up kids they all used to tease him when he walked by we called him chicken man he had a feather in his hat had a toy chicken on top of his car he drove through the downtown area flashing the lights and occasionally honking when he got out of his car he drove he walked downtown with a baby carriage with two little dolls in there and a picture of a woman and when you say something to him or get close to him you hear him making the sounds of a chicken we were all laughing a chicken man we didn't know chicken the story of the man Chicken Man woke up one morning around 3 am. m. and his house was on fire, he panicked and went out the window to the left quickly only to get out and hear his children and his wife scream for

help

, he ran to the door to leave. he went in to save them and the flames were too hot too awesome he tried to get in he couldn't get in he was desperate frantic too soon the screaming stopped they perished in the fire his brother in law came and found out his sister had died and his nieces in the fire grabbed the man chicken and they started hitting him chicken why didn't you save my sister you are a chicken you are a chicken when people took him out of the chicken man they picked him up and said it's you it's ok and Chicken Man looked at him and started making the sounds of a chicken.

He never got over that tragedy. He got caught up in that experience. None of us knew why Chicken Man went wrong with this image and these dolls. stuck in anger for a long time when i promised my foster mom to buy her house from her. I will never forget the experience of working very hard to come up with the money for a down payment. Someone had told me about a beautiful my house, an exclusive area of ​​Miami, I went to see it, my mother took her there and she said yes, she wanted, it was in the water, we went to the closing, my lawyer said Les, have you had a title search?

I said, what is a title search? a couple of days to check and make sure there are no liens against the property that you might have to pay if you buy this house the guy who was there selling me the house said listen he said the only reason I'm selling you this house and selling it with losses is because I admire the fact that you want to buy this house for your mother. I have another guy who will give me a lot more money, but I like you and I have to get back to Philly now, if we can't consummate this deal now, then the deal is off.

I said there are no liens against the property. He says no, of course not. I looked at my lawyer. I said I believe you. I will sign. without questioning his honesty, he said, but business is business. I signed that contract and we had a big celebration. Everyone in the neighborhood was talking about Leslie coming home. One of the twins she made me adopt to buy her a home. He's going to bless it, yes, a few weeks later I got a letter, a certified letter stating that the house was to be sold by the bailiff on the courthouse steps, a man had filed a twelve thousand dollar lien against the property because the previous owner owed him that. money and if I didn't get twelve thousand dollars in 30 days I was going to sell the house to the highest bidder I called this man and said sir my name is Les Brown I bought this house I had nothing to do with your previous Bill before Bill Bill said that that's not my problem he said i should have had a title search i said can you give me time?

I said that my mother is an old lady who has a bad heart and I said please I said if you give me the time I don't know how I'm going to do it with a note from the house and everything else but I think I can pay you at least two thousand dollars a month and in six months I'll pay you the money somehow he said no I want it all in 30 days or you're gone I did everything I could I racked my head thinking about how I could get twelve thousand dollars because I took everything I could to get the money just for the down payment and the closing that I finally had to face the reality that I was not going to be able to do it I was up like two in the morning walking around thinking how I was going to tell my mother that my children were there in the room sleeping all night.

I suffered for this. I lost over 23 pounds very quickly. I went to the room where my mother slept and said mom. I knelt down by the bed. I said mom. I have to talk to you and she said what's up. Mom I said we have to get out of the house I said in my rush to buy the house I made a mistake she said it's ok baby I didn't like this house anyway I said mom you told me you love it I brought our friends here to see it she said you know i have arthritis in my knees and i don't like to climb steps but i knew it made you happy you loved it so much i said mom i lost 23 pounds dying from this ok we had to pack up and go back to the old house across the street from Northwestern High School in Liberty City all those neighbors who came out and saw us leave coming back we went into the house the cockroaches were playing cards saying come in and take a humiliated hand words cannot encompass the symbolism of what i felt i remember when i was unloading the furniture and i started to cry my sister came hmm you know you had no money to buy no house mr big time oh now y'all back where you belong foreign while i was crying and my head down taking furniture and my mom said head up i said mom i said i feel so bad about this mom said lift your head and dry your tears you have nothing to be ashamed of and i did like we unloaded that furniture in that house for several weeks i was numb i was immobilized with anger if i had seen that guy i was thinking of flying to philadelphia i had all kinds of dreams with him and no I don't want to hit this guy hitting would be too good for him.

I just want to grab it and bite it. I just did it and found it. for him I would have bitten him every time he would have been like a Doberman Pinscher yeah but God would say I thought I did everything but I don't know where this came from. I was reading a book on forgiveness and they had a line that said forgive and grow I had to let go of that baggage you see your mind is you know when you go to a gas station to get gas you don't go there and just start pumping when you push the lever up delete the previous ticket in the same way if you want to start moving you have to clear your mind of all the unnecessary baggage and the baggage that is weighing us down I couldn't move I couldn't think what what was I going to do to get out of this situation because I was so worried about what happened and what it did to me and how bad it was I was so caught up I couldn't even focus on what I should have made myself feel sorry for myself and angry and none of it was

getting

me anywhere so soon I learned through effort I made a determined deliberate conscious effort I had to let go I had to forgive him let go and start concentrating on developing myself and I tell you you're going to have people do things to you things are going to happen to you and the most important thing you have to do It's tapping into your will and letting it go and moving so you can grow so you can get on with your life no matter what happens to you what matters is what you gonna do about it what you gonna do now huh?

How long will you repeat the same thing over and over and over and over and over again how many times do we have to hear that don't go around telling people what your story is everyone has a story eighty percent don't care and 20 I'm glad you are You said I'm glad that didn't happen to me, sometimes you think you have some problems, you hear someone else's problem and if their problem is really serious, it makes you feel good, am I right? so i had to quitmove on, we all have stories to tell. Chicken Man allowed the tragedy of him. to destroy your life we ​​all have experienced some tragedy and if we haven't we will and you might even let it destroy your life or you can build on it yes you can let it stop you or you can decide I'm not going to let it that happen to me i'm bigger than this make a statement to yourself declare all out war you're going to get out of this rut ​​i don't care how good you should care how talented you are i don't care how hard you work on yourself there are times when when things won't work out they just won't work out there are times when everything that can happen will happen Murphy's Law will knock on the door on your door why I don't know why that's called life and you have to deal with that sometimes your life will be in a slump just like sports some of the best shooters can't score baskets at different times in games they fall into a slump Do they sit on the sidelines and say you know i didn't make a basket today?

No, they continue to run. I suggest that if you are faced with a challenge, don't stop keeping yourself busy, work your plan, keep doing those things that you know will work for you after you have assessed yourself from the situation keep moving keep busy keep busy keep busy repeat after me help someone and help yourself cause what you give is what you get find someone you can help so you can forget for a moment you see sometimes the best thing to do is be sometimes you have to back off and go inside yourself a bow and arrow you can't take a boat and just push it for an hour you just can't push the arrow out you have to pull it back and then let go sometimes you have to go back and go inside and pray and meditate and recharge your batteries go clear your head and then come back and look at it from a different point of view do not Do not trade while under the spell or effect of what is happening.

The next thing is that you have to activate the Thinker in you. Don't let your emotions control you. We are emotional but you want to start disciplining your emotion if you don't discipline and contain your emotions they will use you your mind becomes automatic like a god you know i loved reading the book called as a thankful man by james allen use the analogy that the mind is like a garden you know weeds don't have to have any encouragement to grow you don't have to water them they don't have to get sun they don't have to have fertile soil they will grow through cracks in a sidewalk am i right? but if you want to grow orchids or roses or any kind of exotic flowers there are special processes and procedures that you have to go through well in the same way you don't have to force yourself or motivate yourself to think negatively be depressed hate someone want revenge want revenge on someone hit yourself on the head feel laden with guilt you don't have to make any effort to do it your mind is on automatic it will do it on its own but if you want to start moving towards your own personal greatness if you really want to start enjoying a happy, successful and healthy life you have to be willing to go against the grain you have to be willing to harness your will and say despite this I am in control here I am not going to let this get me down I am not going to let this destroy me I am coming back stronger and better thank you to that You have to make a statement that this is what you stand for You're standing up for your dreams You're standing up for peace of mind You're standing up for health You want it and you're going to do everything you can to have it It's not going to be like this Be easy when you want to change It's not easy if indeed it was easy everyone would do it but if you're serious you'll do your best yes i'm going to change this situation i'm not going to sit around and moan and cry about what happened and what went wrong and who did what i'm going to do to do something about this situation the next thing that is important is to hope that things improve for you because they are you are not what it is exp whatever experience you are having right now has not come to stay has come to pass not to stay just to get through just going through the biggest challenge is knowing what's going on this is part of what we call life i'll get through this too and keeping perspective putting it in perspective i was doing training at a university and it was a two day training during orientation and in the training that I provide I am a motivational speaker but I conduct processes and personal dynamics where people begin to go through changes that stimulate the left and right hemispheres of the brain allow them to see themselves differently I ran this particular simulation with these young people from 17 and 18 years old so that they began to see how they make decisions how they would. survive in this particular simulation process we gave them to do it individually and then collectively more than 30 percent of them wrote as their first option to survive they would commit suicide first thing they wrote suicide among young people has increased 300 More than 5,000 they will successfully take life this year.

Because? Why did they fast? I was so surprised. they were going to do after they committed suicide I said listen kodumbo now when you find a permanent solution to a temporary problem that's it game over that's it you're not going to do anything no one wrote suicide at the top can you put your pencil down we see many due to our limited view of ourselves many of us begin to focus on problems and allow them to overwhelm us begin to think we have no options begin to believe there is no way out repeat after me there is always a road where there's a will there's a way shake hands with someone to your right left and tell them i'm unstoppable you have to make those kind of statements to yourself i'm unstoppable this won't get me down and if i get knocked down im gonna be like um leo pascal you said you were gonna have some low points in life but when you do you will have ups and downs bring your work on yourself what are some of those things you can do during this period of time go for a walk do some things for yourself just take a walk so you can reflect on life in yourself look and enjoy the universe smell the roses along the way listen to upbeat music music that inspires you I only have good things I have strategies I engage in to recharge my batteries I am preparing for it because I know things are going to happen that i can't anticipate a very good friend of mine died the other day i had a show for me i have books i read that inspire me tapes i listen to that turn me on because sometimes you're going to have low moments where you don't want to get out of bed so You just want to stay there sometimes you won't want to leave the house sometimes you're going to feel bad and you don't know why I was wrong I don't know just leave me alone why it happened that's not called life the other thing is to take full responsibility for your life accept where you are and the responsibility that you are going to take you where you want to go someone said that we have two main choices in life we ​​can accept conditions as they exist or we can take responsibility for changing them I see many people want to exempt themselves from taking responsibility.

All they want to do is talk about the problem. Every time you see them, they will tell you their story over and over again. No, no, you want to take responsibility. I have your life here I can get out of this and I'm going to get out I'm not going to be a voluntary victim those who see things happen and those who don't know what happened and he said that people who get along in this life look for circumstances that they want and if they don't find them, they create them so that they are part of starting to get

unstuck

.

You have to decide that the pattern of behavior that you have adopted does not work for you. the power to do it you can decide that you are going to change that you are not going to be a coward you can decide that you are going to stand up to life you can decide that I am going to live each day as if it were my last thing that you can you have the power to make that decision you can decide i am going to work on myself and develop i am going to empower myself and all these things that are happening to me right now are just temporary inconveniences they are not stronger than i am in charge here next thing is to separate what you do from who you are from that's what the guilt trap is about seeing a lot of people won't let you forget what you used to do or what you've made the mistakes you've made all of us have made some mistakes in life we've all done some things that if we had to do it again we wouldn't do it again a lot of things that if i had to do it again if i had known then what i know now i would have done it differently well it happened that way and that's what you call life i didn't do it like that oh, you don't want me to live that how do you want to keep putting it in my face about what i did guess what i'm not interested in that's what i did so i won't do it today so you're messing with an innocent man hello so you're in the process of Reinventing your life write a description of the type of person you want to be one of the things you must overcome what qualities of your personality you know you are going to have to change because those particular characteristics are responsibilities to you what are your assets what are your strengths look at yourself and evaluate yourself to make that determination another thing is that to get out of the rut we need some training find some trusted critics people you know who care about you love you say some things that prevent us from growing and

getting

out of the number one rut we identify with feedback we take it personally when someone wants to give us feedback on where we are falling short tell us about our blind spots we want everything to be positive about us you are not perfect it hurts i have a friend who is a trusted critic i don't like it but I love him he doesn't tell me the things I want to hear he tells me what I need to hear to grow it hurts me It hurts when he puts me on a bench.

I can't stand it, but that's the only way I can grow and I'm glad he loves me enough to risk our friendship to tell me what I need to hear, not what I want. To listen, find a support group, someone you can talk to, people who may have a similar problem. they give you an idea of ​​how they handle that situation and create an opening for you to start stimulating some possibilities in your mind about how you can solve the problem we can't grow alone as i mentioned before we grow from people and projects the other thing is about the life when things happen to you when you allow things to use you you can't change the past but you can interpret you can reinterpret how you see it for years i walked with a big load on my shoulders feeling bad because i was adopted doing interviews for adoption agencies in foster homes and i was on tv once and i told these people in this particular interview that i was going to give my twin brother and i a gift when we were six weeks old, a friend of mine luckily was listening to the show and she said we'd like to have lunch with you and then i went to see her she said when a woman carries a baby for nine months feeling life move in her it is automatic and natural for her to learn to love that baby what she expects was to come here when she bears the pain to bring it into the world your mother Mamie Brown when she came to adopt you she didn't go through that process she looked at whoever her birth mother was and said I'll take her you weren't giving away less you were chosen with love the same circumstances the same event but reinterpreted an empowering interpretation does it make sense to you then when you start looking at your past give an interpretation that empowers you that's where i used to be it's not where i am now.

I am growing now. I want you to think about your mind right now. Think of a particular event or act in your life that you feel really bad about. You really regret that that happened if you had to. again you would do it differently with that there I want you to see yourself in your mind and tell yourself I love myself unconditionally and I forgive myself if I had known better I would have done better I want you to think of someone that causes you some pain, caution and disappointment someone you don't like let me tell you something about the mind how it uses you i tell you something super stupid i used to do you know for years i hated my mom and dad? whoever they were because they ratted me out like i thought at the time and guess what i had no faces for hate because i never saw any of them and i said i hate them for it and then once i forgave them and said it was ok if they didn't give me away , I would never have been blessed to have the mother that I have, who to me is the best mother in the world, so the universe unfolds as it should, but when I went through this process saying forgive them, I remember in my mind as I tried to imagine these people, I had two people in my mind standing there with no faces because I didn't know what they looked like, but I blurted out that I let that baggage think of someone you have heard of someone you have let down either deliberately or inadvertently or someone who has hurt you Deliberately or inadvertently think of that person who really really when you think of them the room turns red look at them with your mind's eye and say I forgive you I forgive youunconditionally boy it's a heavy burden to leave when i thought of that boy i said wait a minute i can't no you don't know what this boy did it was my mom you don't know what We went through my students.

We said we forgive them. Let go. If you want to be forgiven, you better forgive someone. No one of us is perfect. We have all made some mistakes and it was not easy. It is not easy to forgive. I am right? It's hard. won't forgive they say i forgive but i don't forget now let it go so you can grow let's do a little demo here throw it this way here okay show it like this come on throw away the negative thoughts Revenge blame whatever that's been holding me back now with that right hand let's bring something i bring love peace of mind good relationships a lot of money i don't know why people raise their voices when we say thank you so much i mean they get serious you know what i mean too and usually people don't use one hand they use two hands they tried to borrow someone else's hand know how to reinterpret our past understand and know that we can move from where we are that we can begin to design the kind of life that empowers us that gives us happiness that allows us to be on top of who we are knowing that as that we begin to explore New Horizons and new Views in life that as we begin to focus on developing ourselves as we begin to elevate ourselves and not follow the crowd by activating the Thinker in us and disciplining and holding the emotional part of ourselves is not easy but through practice and practice and practice the practice does what absolutely doesn't matter what the belief system the practice does Improvement you can always improve you can always go beyond anything you you've ever done you never reach a state of perfection you're always bigger than what you do and so all you're looking for is new breakthroughs through practice and practice and practice you'll get better and better and better and there are still some things that they will happen they will catch you on the blind side you didn't anticipate you will be knocked down but won't knock you unconscious you will be able to get to your feet again get on the ropes you have a fast recovery rate when working on yourself read inspiring books of course listen to tapes starting to get inspired and stay around people who will empower you people who will help you feel good about who you are how you are in the process of transforming your life it is so beautiful today someone gave me something about life called what is life i would like to share it with you Getting unstuck means that you are going to start living life on your terms instead of spending every day on automatic, but you are aware that you are stimulated and excited about the future that is unfolding, that you have a special power within you. , that you know that things will get better for you, you know that you can handle this and sometimes you have to cry sometimes life will bring you to your knees but pain opens faces in the heart joy someone said about life a love that says that life is like an onion you have to peel it one layer at a time and sometimes you cry this author said about life life is a challenge face it life is an accepted gift life is an adventure dare life is a pain get over it life is a tragedy face it life is a must realize it life is a game a plan life is a mystery revealed life is a song sing it life is a chance take it life is a journey completed life is a promise keep it life is a beauty praise it life is a fight fight it life is a goal reach it life is a puzzle solve it not so beautiful i love it remember something i heard in high school its called i met a man today at first i said i was irish 'Cause he's got an Irish way about a friendliness and kindness that warms you through him and then I thought oh no he's not really he's Jewish his eyes are as dark and eloquent as prayer eyes like those maybe Peter or something Once Emmanuel stood there with a quiet Grace so thin he was and tall he knew he was an Englishman and not a Jew at all and yet his skin was very fair a viking could be like those who launch their ships into the sea his hair was dark with the mist of india japan his courtesy was that of china in his dignity around i met a man today and he was wonderfully fair he really was a son of god and he came from everywhere this is mrs.

Mamie Brown saying that it has been a great pleasure as well as a privilege thanks to everyone here