How we got rid of our stuff (family minimalism)Jan 02, 2022
well i think this is a great question, how do we get rid of all our
stuff? But I think there are really three parts: One, how do we disengage our brains and separate ourselves from it so that we can literally get rid of 80 of the things? we've spent the past 10 years piling up two, how we systematically overhauled our house to do it and three, what we did with all the
stuff, so I'll tell you what we did with it, but also what I think is best. has something to do with this right now with our current circumstances and i think what i heard is that it will actually make you want to get rid of more and more so that's awesome so i'll share that with you too hi i'm Dawn from the minimalist mom, we love sharing tips and tricks to help you simplify your home quickly because it has made such a difference in our lives and so I'm not saying that to try to be dramatic, it's just every day. we are still reaping the benefits of greatly simplifying our home to the point that we call ourselves minimalist but you stop where you feel comfortable whenever your home is like to the point where you like it easy to care for and maintain then you stop there but I was actually visiting a moms group on Saturday that was part of our better together group it's a group that's all about supporting families but also making it simple too so if you need some support in those arenas you're open to yourself see you tomorrow but i'll put those details down below but we were talking about uh when we don't always respond to our kids the way we'd like maybe sometimes we yell at them or are a little short tempered with them and at first i was a little hesitant to bring it up because I'm always the one to say ok simplifying your house doesn't help at all but I finally said ok do you feel like since you've simplified your house it's easier to m keep it clean, so it is more tidy, like when your house is tidy and tidy, do you feel like you?
You are more emotionally capable of responding to your children or other
familymembers in the way you would like and everyone agreed, yes we have seen the direct correlation between how we feel emotionally, mentally, how we can respond to our
familyand our environment and how the clutter and clutter make us feel so i was glad to know i'm not the only one but to recognize that it's one thing to get rid of all the junk is another thing well so i hope you'll subscribe and we can spend a little more time together, but let's talk about these three things today, one, how I mentally separated myself from these things so I could get rid of them, two, how we systematically go through our house to do it, and three, what we did with all the junk right, so let's talk about it ok number one this is the hard part how do we mentally prepare to start getting rid of the things we spent money on that tom and i had accumulated the 12 years before and now we? just let's go I don't want to get rid of everything and I mean advice.
I think this is a very personal turning point for most of us, but for me we were at a stage where we just had Gage, so we had four kids four and under and people just looked at us like we were crazy so i'm trying to make it sound like hey we made it together we knew what we were doing when we planned our family we wanted so many kids it wasn't an accident. you know all that but day after day in our home was stressful and it was getting to a point where i felt resentful, i stayed home, tom had to go to work every day and be with adults and here i was washing the Same dishes, picking up the same toys, folding the same laundry day after day and I just remember thinking it was okay so this is what the life of a stay at home mom will look like now for the next what five six seven ten years and it was so frustrating for me and before that I had actually really enjoyed my job and what I did and now it felt like a huge sacrifice to be able to stay home with our kids like it was the other way around and then I would feel guilty about it and not appreciate it, you know? that i had to stay home and i just wanted to get back to work right so i started a blog because i thought i needed some kind of creative outlet and i really enjoyed it but then i was spending more time on that than keeping the house and tom would come home and he would say oh okay and he would stress about it.
I didn't know then that I was literally having a cortisol response like the release of the stress hormone or I probably would have put more effort into um but you know that was right where we were and it was gross like it was gross it didn't feel good no one was winning so i listened to a joshua becker podcast he said hey did you know i dont i dont have to have all this stuff and i am an easy sell and thats all i needed to hear and i said we really dont so i started looking into
minimalismand i said wow, people really do live on a lot less and they say they're really happy, so i said, you know what?
I have nothing to lose. I literally didn't feel like I had anything to lose at the time so I thought I'd just give it a try and we were lucky a lot of our stuff wasn't expensive. point in our life almost everything was secondhand or bought from destination clearance rack like my wardrobe destination clearance rack right and that made it a little easier but i was so tired of how we lived that i honestly felt i didn't I have nothing to lose and I just wanted to get started, so that was the change that took place in my mind: I wanted more time to work on my blog and some other marketing stuff I was doing, but I still don't feel like a loser. as a mom like i still wanted to do well also like it was still a priority for me so i wanted to be able to work be a good mom and keep the house in order like those were my goals and that became my focus and So number two, how do we systematically check our house as many? we used the onion approach and I love it because you literally go layer by layer through your house and it doesn't feel super dramatic or jarring or overwhelming so I would go to the kitchen and it was okay what am I not using? and that was my filter that first layer through my house was like what I'm not using and that probably took off I don't know 30 or 40 of the stuff and that was great because we started testing how I felt especially when I did the toys out of the kids and I really simplified them into my own wardrobe and then in the kitchen it was like oh so it really feels good to have extra space in the cabinets and in our closet and the toys were so much more manageable and I was like okay this really feels okay and so for that first round my filter was like what are we not using literally don't use don't touch never use but then on the next few layers it was like oh but could we get by without it? and this is where the inventory idea really comes in.
It started to become apparent that it was fine, we could keep it, but could we live without it? Because then I no longer have to manage it, I don't have to inventory it, the children when they play like me. in the kitchen cooking they are messing with the cabinets they are taking it out that would be one less thing that i don't have to put back or i don't have to pick up again and that was my filter for the second time it was like, but could we do without it? and that was very liberating because I had gone through the previous layer, you know, and kind of built my ordered muscles, like we talked about, then I got to that second layer. and it was so liberating it went from the first layer feeling like a lot of ugh decisions or a lot of mental work to decide ok no we really don't need it but then the next few layers I felt freedom it was like liberating like yeah , I don't need this, I won't miss it, I like it. literally getting it out of my house so I don't have to handle it anymore and that's when it started to get fun and where it was like okay what else can we get rid of?
What else can we get rid of and now? the house feels very manageable which i never thought was possible with four young kids and it's great so now everything that comes in is going through that filter do we really need it and as i move into storage spaces and the kids ? seasonal clothes and I thought oh I used to think we each needed like 20 outfits but oh they actually need like four or five yeah I do laundry more often but I like it because there aren't big piles of clothes in the laundry room and it's like this idea of having less inventory to manage was like that it's so cool and we started to experience it and feel the difference and it just got easier and easier so I know early on it can be really daunting very daunting and I'm one that I don't do well with big projects like every time we're remodeling and we're at the beginning I feel so overwhelmed because I think the end is so far away it's such a big project and we have to step back and say, okay, Yeah it's a big project but I'm going to do five minutes I'm going to do ten minutes I'm going to do 15 minutes and I'll be like a 15 minute warrior and I'll do that and then I can put it aside for a while and just learn this. tricks and technique s to keep moving forward are very important and it really made a big difference because, again, our kids were little so I had nap hours, but it's not like I got all nap time because you still have 12 other things. you're wanting to do nap time well and it's like finding these little time slots and doing whatever you can and i've also talked about this the only regret i have as we were going through that tidying up process it took us about a year to go through all our house to really get to where I would say we call ourselves minimalist.
My only regret during that time is that I didn't order more. I hadn't yet developed the muscles to sort and keep everything collected and I would have to know that looking back now that we would have started to experience the benefits. Before if I had been keeping the house more tidy as well, but I was so focused as a laser focused on tidying and going through things and getting rid of them that I let the news slip because I was like well that's always going to be there like this, mess those toys up , it still works every day and looking back i wish i would have picked up more and ordered more throughout it all but in hindsight it's 20 20. but that would be my advice for you to stick with. ordering only g the way to make tithing a priority and you will really see the benefits soon and that is what you earn other people in your household i get the question every day how do i get my husband or others to participate in your home are tidy? so they really experience the benefits of the work, the simplifying work you're doing and it's only a matter of time before they invite you into their side of the closet to help them through it.
We really do hear these stories every single day, so hold your ground, you'll win them over. I really, honestly, I think with all my heart, lastly, what did we do with this step? And again the question arises. I would say but for a garage sale should I try and sell at a market and it would say we had a fifty dollar threshold so if it was over fifty dollars not the original value if we could get over fifty dollars per him, we would keep it and Tom would sell it at that time. um craigslist or ebay but anything below that we just donated i d didnt want to mess around with the garage sale.
I know we could have made money, but through this process I started saving money because I wasn't doing the same shopping and impulse buying anymore, so it felt good because I really felt like our budget was benefiting from just not buying as many things. that I didn't have to try to squeeze every penny out of things and again at this point we didn't have extra, like Tom was the only one working so we could have used the extra money. but i knew i needed to get it out or it might never get out so you do it if you really need the money then sell it if that and enjoy it or not its too stressful but for a lot of us we need to get it going start enjoying the benefits and trust our budget is going to be much better once we get this all figured out so you don't have to worry too much so 50 was our threshold i said all goodwill what you want about goodwill but it was my best choice in the you I think they do a lot of good, you know anyway, so that's where I brought it.
I have since found another thrift store that is run by a church in our area and everything goes back into the community, so I started. I bring things in there and I also found good things for the kids so I like being able to sew them again that's why I bring things in now but if thrift stores are closed in your area or you have small children and it's not practical make all these trips there. I have heard so many good reports about putting things for free in front of your house along the road or on the corner and then you put in the market that is there for free. or on craigslist, any site you want to use, but you say you have free stuff and allWhat I have heard is that there will be a backlog of cars out of the people who receive them.
Everyone likes free stuff. Sometimes I feel guilty about it. because I don't want other people to take it either but we just have to get it out of our house but here's the cool thing about it: I hear people say things like they take things out they're like oh cool like it's gone people were excited to get it and then you end up going back to the house and saying, hey, what else could I put in there? What else could I put in there because it is so? instant gratification from the stuff you're getting rid of and that's what I like about this method: you don't have to go anywhere, it doesn't matter if you have kids at home, you don't have to literally take people to come and get it from you and it's really effective as if the stuff is gone.
I've never heard of anyone having anything left after doing this. you wouldn't believe the stuff people were taking so i think this method is very effective and you might even find that it makes you get rid of more than you originally expected which i consider a win so i think that's a very good thing like this, but let us know if you have other similar creatives. it says you've gotten rid of stuff especially if the thrift stores are closed in your area right now but I hope this is helpful I really can't say enough good things about simplifying our home it has changed everything and everyone in our house does benefit and feels more mentally level when the house is tidy and tidy, so it has been a great victory, I don't feel guilty about asking the children for help because I know it is a manageable amount for them and it has been good, if you haven't already, I hope you will subscribe so we can spend more time together.
If he's a parent looking for more support in that field, we'd love to have him join our Better Together group. I hope you have a great day I love you and I will visit you again soon
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