Game Theory: The Kindergarten Family Secret (Kindergarten 2)

Sharpening your pencils will help you break the tip of the machine because today school is back in session, we're talking

kindergarten

and the question on everyone's mind what's the deal with the Nuggets, what are you doing here, nugget? he thought he took care of all the people at the end of his last

game

he doesn't want another nugget

theory

nugget had some illness the golden rats in the microwave right now they can't be bothered with your miserable series but nugget what else would we talk about Kinder garden? this is pretty much your

game

there's nothing like there's a ton of story here to work with no story no story a threat silly of course there's a story here's a story at work in my game where you lose your little pebble brain this series goes beyond the nugget cave and is darker than the inside oh hello yes the nugget has shaken this

theory

for you today hello internet, welcome to game theory where today we revisit one of my favorite games of the year,

kindergarten

.

Now I don't know about you, but that's what kindergarten was for me. Special time in life when things were a little simpler, when life was more daring, God was a pair of safety scissors and the coolest kids were the ones who walked around with clear gel glue in their art box, but yeah You have to believe in video games in this formative year. The Department of Education has certainly become a little more ruthless since I was last at school, apparently it's now a world where the adults are all after you, the other kids are hiding armed lasers waiting for their chance to assert dominance of the playground.

I guess we've really adopted the survival of the fittest mantra in our school systems anyway, if you're not familiar with kindergarten words, the sequel first just go play the games, catch up, they're short, They are cheap and absolutely worth playing. to its completion in most endings, a lot of kids end up on the wrong side of the janitor's mop, so to speak, which you know is kind of mainstream programming for this channel, which means you'll probably enjoy your gaming experience In the premises of The Old Kindergarten and Kindergarten you must basically survive the day while helping your classmates and teachers with totally brand-safe plots that everyone has in place, which includes finding more mysterious pills to grow your empire on the black market or brutally finish off his twin brother in a bet. to claim sole ownership of his father's multimillion-dollar corporation, you know, typical activities for a normal five-year-old kindergarten: introduce the familiar faces who managed to survive the first game, pester the bully into wandering around the ex's son director, bad girl Cindy the best nugget, sure, smart salesman, Monty, plot device, Lily, next appeal, Edie, if you say so, since I'm not a H Brack, judge the appearance of children in age preschool and adults, such as the drug-addicted, murder-prone janitor Miss Applegate, but the sequel also features some new features. faces the mix as the director who experiments with children, his daughter, Professor BOTS, giant forehead and Bob, a really nice genre, yes, he is very sweet, so you know he won't be long for this world as he develop the game, we gather information.

That helps build backstories for many of the characters that are much deeper than you'd expect for an 8-bit game that only takes a few hours to play - for example, we know that Cindy's background is filled with domestic problems. , divorce, we know. That Miss Applegate has a long struggle with substance abuse and that Penny suffered horrific physical trauma that turned her into the Android she is today, but of all the characters, no one's backstory is more intriguing and more heavily guarded. than that of the janitors, I mean, although we end up fighting giant sci-fi monsters in the cave under the school building at the end of the game, the janitor really is the main antagonist of the game, as he mercilessly mows down students and Teachers alike, even eliminating fellow janitor Bob, are the janitors.

After all, the code told you that Bob was not long for this world in kindergarten. We quickly established that the janitor regularly kills children for little to no reason, from talking to him too much to correcting his grammar, and he claimed several times that he didn't. He's even supposed to be among the children as we help carve out his trail of destruction. Mild snippets of his backstory sneak in, but it's nothing all that significant at least until a random line in kindergarten: He reminds me of my dirty son. ugly and I gave him away, excuse me, the murderous janitor has a

secret

son, I don't know what the biggest revelation here is, that he has a son, that he didn't kill him or that he found a friend who was willing to meet him in the closet brooms first, you know what I mean, regardless of whether this is a big reveal for a character who largely remains wrapped up in a cranky old murder mystery.

No, it could just be a cool Easter egg, a throwaway line thrown in for laughs and to slightly develop this mysterious character, but in these games the details you learn about each character tend to influence the game in one way or another, For example, you learned that Nugget has a behavioral disorder for which he is being medicated, but he does not take his pills, that information is worthwhile because it explains why he always has pills ready to give to Miss Applegate. Jerome is an egomaniac in the first game, but again, this pays off when the player can use that arrogance to gain access to his father.

The Dam Cybil Also in the second game we learned that Penny had a tragic accident when she was a baby, which directly influences her existence as a robot during the course of the game. These details don't tend to be random, they are integrated. So we can use them as logical clues for the game or at least paint a clearer picture of the kindergarten universe. Sure the characters in these games may be relatively thin, but the details we learn about them certainly aren't arbitrary. With this in mind, it seems fair to ask if there is a connection between the janitor's backstory and what we see happen in the game;

In other words, we know that the janitor has a

secret

son that he gave up at a young age and that there is somewhere where my son is one of the children we see in either of these two news stories kinder to find out. I went through every story and every dialogue tree in both games to see if any other characters gave any hints about details of their background that would potentially involve them being abandoned by an evil, hateful, rage-filled member of the janitorial staff, and surprisingly I think that I found it. I think we have not only a viable candidate but a probable one.

The most kept secret of kindergartens is that the janitor has a son, a son who attends the same school where he works, he doesn't even realize it and that my friends is what we are exposing today as an episode of Maury, We're opening that manila envelope to tell the janitor that yes, he is the father of one. of the kids you see on stage right now, but which matchmaker makes me a match given the janitor's age? Montee points out in kindergarten that he is an octogenarian, which puts him in his 80s, hardly anyone is off limits, but the janitor specifically does so.

Let's say he abandoned a son, so he immediately kills off all the female characters in both games. We won't include hall monitors as an option here because we never learn much about them other than one like smoking cats and smoking cats. The same happens. To all the generic kids being used in experiments under the school, you're just not important enough for us to worry about, so stay in your test tubes like good little kids, so with that our list of potential Sons secrets looks like this. Billy annoys the twins Felix and Ted Jerome Monty and Ossie equipped with our father and a list of potential children, it's time to play backwards with Mamma Mia and match the child with the father, now we can eliminate some of these from the competition quite quickly.

Billy is known to be a twin. with his sister Lily and the janitor also never mentions abandoning a girl, so let's take a short list. The same goes for Felix and Ted, the janitor says he abandoned a son and not children. We also know that Jerome's father was the director of the kindergarten. that leaves him out of the competition and we're down to half of our original list of contestants who's your daddy Monty Ossie and annoyingly, the new kid in this trio is Ozzie, who we first meet in kindergarten , which is also the game where we first learn about the janitor's secret son coincidence.

I think so. Ozzy's modus operandi is that he doesn't trust the new kids, which, to be honest, is probably a good decision considering they help advance plots that eliminate him on multiple occasions. different plays, the only other things we learn about Ozzy is that he has OCD, a severe case of asthma and that his mother runs a successful company, the janitor never mentions anything about any of these things, in fact the two characters never interact in absolute, which would be a pretty difficult theory to float, not even I can get that far this time, moving on to Monty, we actually have the complete opposite story, while Ozzie and the janitor have no connection whatsoever.

Monty and the janitor are constantly at odds with each other. We know in the first game that the janitor sells Monty school supplies, so they briefly do business together, but when Monty corrects the janitor's spelling, all alliances are thrown out the window at kindergarten: Monty takes revenge. blasting the janitor out of existence with a laser, so unlike Ozzie that there's at least some history here to draw from, but let's be honest, the two share absolutely no traits. Monty is a smart, intelligent, extremely literate five year old boy who is more interested in becoming a murderous businessman than becoming a murderous murderer so it doesn't make much sense that he would be related to our old friend the janitor who is violent. and street smart yes, but he's definitely not book smart Monty solves problems with his mind the janitor solves problems with his mouth in fact In kindergarten, Monty's mission is the only non-violent mission in the game, so I think that leaves him out of contention, leaving us with only one real contender, mistakes and as a viewer of the show you probably expect him to have I saved the best for last and you'd be absolutely right and on a superficial level it's interesting to note that Bugs and the janitor are the only two male characters in both games with gray hair.

Sure that could be because the janitors are over 80 years old, but for Bugs. a five-year-old kindergartner, it's an odd detail, especially considering that none of the other kids have any kind of gray-haired nugget, by the way, she's canonically blonde, in case you're wondering, my knuckles are golden and luxurious on top of that. Throughout all dialogue in both games, the only characters in the game who are considered ugly enough to comment on it are, you guessed it, the janitor and the first bugs in kindergarten. The janitor mentions that you don't want to wake up in 20 years. and look like me, he also specifically mentions that his baby was ugly, but again in kindergarten we have Monty telling the player that I wouldn't want to look like insects either, but obviously this is all superficial and tenuous, right: ugly characters. with gray hair, big wolf, no amount of mild insults will make bugs the janitor's son, so we have to look a little deeper to find something that really sticks, fortunately for us and tragically for bugs, we learned very quickly in the first game the errors appear. of a broken home it is very clearly established that Bugs was abandoned by his father at a young age saying "quote, darling, we'll be back", he simply went to the store to buy some cigarettes, all abandoned just like the janitor abandoned his young son and don't you dare suggest that his deadbeat father was anything but a serious guy because if you do, the bugs will beat the snot out of you, which will lead to his second connection with both dear old dad and the janitor who solves problems with violent insects? the school bully largely due to his father's disappearance, repeatedly says during the first game that he resorts to violence simply because it will make his father proud, my father will be back, get out of here, old beaches, with so much strength that I will be proud of again and again. in a different section of the game,what do you want?

Come make more jokes about my dad before he dies. He will be very proud of me, unlike Monty and Ozzy. The bugs seem to have a built-in violent streak, just like our favorite member of the school's custodial staff. who spends all day threatening to hit or stab children to get what he wants. Interestingly, real-world research conducted at places like the University of Washington has shown that children who are exposed to violence or who come from homes with domestic problems are statistically more likely to engage in real-world peer violence. ; In other words, kids who are bullied at home are more likely to be bullies at school now.

I'm certainly not implying that all children who witness violence become bullies in the real world. world, but for our purposes, bugs like the classroom bully are statistically more likely to have had a violent parent, a problem-solving parent like our good friend the janitor, but not just violent bugs, he also has a long history of cover his tracks the same way the janitor hides his crimes in both kindergarten one and kindergarten two, we see the janitor burying bodies himself or we aid and abet him in doing so and once you know, in kindergarten infants 1 we do the same with the bugs were recruited to try to convince nugget to hide a bloody knife for us in his name in nugget's cave all the players talk to the bugs about the cover-up he says you want this thing to be hidden where no one will ever find her, trust I know from experience confirming that this is not bugs her first time at the rodeo and the murder weapon hideout, is a phrase that could have easily come out of the janitor's mouth, but if the good looks and Sharing love for committing murderous violence and subsequently covering it up is not enough.

To prove that these two come from the same branch of the

family

tree, Sonny and Dad here also share some other specific habits that ensure their relationship in kindergarten. One, the player must trade with the janitor for a powerful laser gun and depending on his inventory you can actually offer a few different things in this trade, the first is pills, but the janitor is not interested in them, they are not particularly relevant either. For us, since bugs never mention a propensity for pills, the next option is cigarettes, which the concierge says he'll take a pinch, but adds that some cigarettes haven't tried one of these since I was your age.

At this point, it seems like a ridiculous thing to say until you realize that this habit apparently runs in the

family

. At another point in the game you have the opportunity to stick the same cigarettes on the bugs in the schoolyard to which he replies: I've been stealing from kids so I can buy them from Monty, which means the bugs actually smoke on their own. age as is his Dear Father, he's the only character who smokes besides the much older hall monitor, so it's an unusual detail to include here, but the janitors' preferences in this comp actually give us our greatest evidence for this theory in that same laser exchange?

At that point, the last thing you can offer the janitor is a flask, which he readily accepts and says Cindy has the best. Okay, give me the flask and you'll have a deal. It's the only thing he really wants and doesn't. It necessarily seems out of place, but it takes on a completely different light when you consider what Bugs misses most about his father at recess. Bugs tells the player that he misses everything about him, even the way you used to drink excessively. He goes on to tell the player how He cherishes the memory of his mom forcing his dad to use a breathalyzer, as well as the flask his dad used to get drunk, wait a minute, a flask, you say flask, it's just like the one my dad I used to get completely banged up, thanks mate. when you offer to give Bugs the flask, he's so grateful to have this connection with his dad that he gives you a monster mountain car.

I'm telling you, if Bugs' janitor hookup wasn't intentionally put into this game in the first place, well, there's enough evidence here to at least make a theory about it and definitely include it in Kindergarten 3 any way we do. Break it down In all of these cases, Bugs and the Janitor are the only two characters that share these types of preferences, there really are some of the only ones. The characters share any type of preference in this game and, from their appearance, the psychology of a scarred childhood, the fact that Bugs was abandoned by his father figure at a young age, the smoker and the real smoking gun, Flass , all the evidence. points out that insects are the janitors, the long-lost or rather abandoned child, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree and if insects somehow manage to survive an entire year of kindergarten, we can probably expect it to follow the bloody footprints of his father.

My only regret now is that I couldn't also tie up Agnes, the dumpster. Hagin is flawed, his mother is, but you know, there just wasn't enough evidence. Okay, dear, wait for the third game. Something tells me that I will return and that is not a theory. No, it's not, but this is a theory. Oh, game theory. This is only 1:30. Cousin to the suckers club. That's it, nugget. Dollar Shave Club not only allows us to continue doing what we do here on the channel, but it also offers the best personal care products. straight to your door, whether you're a bearded old janitor, a surprisingly mature five-year-old or a particularly hairy woman and a shave might as well be in her name.

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