Game Night Stereotypes

Just roll the dice! --1, go. Animal feathers in New York. Pigeon. No! Eagle? No, they fall on people. Purple Martin. No! We used to have purple martins. Do you know how many mosquitoes eat? Oh, can I come in? Flying. Every word they say to you is the one you want to say! The most difficult thing in the world. Playing with you. No no no no. This is a mineral. What do you like to eat in the morning before going to work or school? Eggs. Yes. Good job. Don't congratulate me! Go to the next one! Here we go.

Wait, wait, wait, wait! Before we start, loser, put the brakes on for a year! That? The last place is eaten by the plant. 12 bites max, buddy. Look at this thing. Bellies...hey, wait for it...not in the pool. Dry land! Dry land, right on the cement, friend! That? Hey? You have something good, don't you? That? No. It's okay, I'll do my best. It's not your turn! Oh I'm sorry. I fold. No! I think... oh, eh, ah, haha, too bad! I sink, I sink, I sink. What are we thinking, a $30 ticket? Let's change someone's life to

night

. Can someone get me some fries?

I left my wallet at home. Yeah! Twenty one! Oh, sorry, wrong

game

. Do not look. Do not look! Oh my mistake. Would you understand? But we saw it. Alright, let's play some Risk. Oh, don't we have to be having dinner in six hours? That's a lot of time! Yeah, it's not like we're playing Monopoly. Are you awake. Yes, I have Europe. No, you're awake! I have Europe, Gary. While we're young, Gary. Gary, are you dead? That's a loss in my book. He played his heart out, man. Oh Gary! Dude, look what I found in the basement.

Oh my God! It's Jumanji! And it's a board

game

! No, not the board game we're going to play! No no no no no no! Dude, the batteries work! This is fantastic! Shut it down! Shut it down! Shut it down! Close it! OK, I'm done, just kidding! Brother, stop, brother, no! I'm not going to touch the dice. A snake slithering in disguise on the ground. It will envelop you. And it will drag you down. I'm not dealing with that. I'm going to grab something to drink right now. They want something? Joe, Joe... What? Joe... No! Oh my God, no, no!

Ah! Go! Go out! Go out! Go! Oh, Cody, did you get the kangaroo card? Technically, it was your turn. But yes, you did it. Oh, it's chasing me! Well, I think we have a little problem now. I agree. Get in the bathroom! Let's go, Let's go, Let's go, Let's go! Come in, come in! Turn on the lights. Password? Yes, I think I'm here. Oh! Welcome, weary traveler! Come join us! Will I roll the dice? (MOSKINGLY) Shall I roll the dice? I guess I'll hit the dragon? Hit the dragon! Beat him! Hit the dragon. Beat him! You have four points of damage to the dragon!

Ah! (GRUFA VOICE) I summon the iron gravel of the fortress! Ah! Yeah! I'm so excited. Oh, I need to be red, sorry. I'm always red. I know, I'm always red. And if you are red, I will play your red pieces thinking they are mine. My house, my choice. Are you OK. OK. OK. Now we are both red! No, we are not! Oh, there are a couple of stragglers around here too. Alright, Codes, kick us out. Sweet! Can I be red? Okay, he's an athlete. I think he used to play baseball. Brett Favre. Yes. Oh, this is difficult.

It's an animal. Hyena! Yeah! I went here in eighth grade. The bathroom. Yes. Balcony. Telescope. Mm-hmm, he's another athlete, I'm pretty sure he's a golfer. Lebron James. You're crushing it! War film. "The sound of the music". Yeah! I killed one in second grade. Tamagochi. That was really sad. Okay, I always wanted one, but I never got it. Holographic Charizard. Yeah! I have two. We'll talk later. I hate doing this to you. Mate. Yes, that's not checkmate. Oh, can you just move it? I have something for you. Buys. Shoop, I can't do that. Is it ever smart to kill your own guy?

Oh, the show made this sound really exciting. And to be honest with you, it's actually not that exciting. Alright, before dessert, honey, do you want to tell them our special news? Yes. Or we could play a game! I was thinking exactly the same! Move! 3. Nervous! Yeah! Oh! No way! Winners! Oh, super fun game, huh? The best of 12? In fact, I feel a little nauseous. Oh, that's the dog. Yes, it's a bit annoying. Could you lock him up or something? I think we can all agree that last year was unacceptable. We are more mature than that. All for one: we play for fun!

Oh, that's cheating, man! You have the table tilted towards you... Are you serious, coming from the most corrupt Monopoly banker of all time? No, no, hey, hey, hey, hey, we're not doing that. We're not going to do that. Oh! What's the matter? Hey, did you fool me, man? Very sorry! That wasn't meant for you! All for fun! This is unacceptable. We are more mature than that. Hey, good game. It's better than last year. Is it under the rug? How did we lose the piece? Are we missing a piece? You missed it! Did someone accidentally eat it while he was eating the fries?

I'm about to lose my mind. No, Ty, it's not worth losing. It's a puzzle. I could have eaten it. Oh, it was... it was in my pocket. Oh God. Sorry, it was stuck to the back of my phone. Oh, man, that was... I'm glad I didn't get angry in the kitchen. If that is all. Alright, good job, guys. Let's put it. Well done. (VOICE OVER) Do you know what I hate? Games. I need to get out of here. Thank you so much. Oh! I have it. I have it. I really thought I was about to win that too. (VOICE OVER) OK, 53% of the time, a right-handed player will play on the right side of the board.

He is wearing a jacket and sweatpants. And today's low was 68. So he's clearly not a very critical thinker. He has Cheeto dust on his hands. I'm not really sure what that indicates. But that could be useful. He is unarmed. He might cheat. He's not going to kill me. But he shouldn't cheat. Cheating is bad. He should follow the game plan. Dude, you have to go. Yeah, sorry, here we go. I need this to win. Focus! They are not understanding this. We have this. Very good, ready? Go! The stopwatch is on. A monkey? Gorilla! Strong! Strong! Orchestra!

Are you serious! It's an iPad! iPad! Ah! Apple Care! Ah! Star Trek! No, it's not Star Trek, you idiot! It's Star Wars gum! Are you kidding me? Get it out of here! Caramba! Oh! "The massacre in Texas!" Easter! He is alive! And he's back for more! Cage Free, Farm Raised! Wait, wait, I got it! Bull in a Chinese store! No! I told you he was going to be mad! Yeah, hey, that was the word "anger." That? Yes pretty. Hey, that was a nice comeback. I thought you would have taken it with the cup in the... yeah.

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