Fast Checkout Line Tricks

Sometimes you need a song for when you run out of toilet paper. Let's talk about that. ♪ (musical theme) ♪ - Good Morning Míticos. - Mythical Beasts, it's Thursday. And on Thursdays they get hungry, so today we have to do some shopping. We push the question cart down the aisles, exploring the almost unlimited amount of things we can buy to fill their bellies with questions. But you are cultivating Mythical Beasts and we have to feed you well. So we head to the produce section to grab some apples and oranges when suddenly we're attacked by an anthropomorphic watermelon.

It's launched! We dodge! It attacks, shooting seeds from its watermelon mouth! But Matrix we beat them in slow motion! Finally, when the watermelon monster is distracted (thanks for distracting him), we jump on him and crush him into a delicious melon. Then we collect the delicious mush of answers, put it in our question cart and deliver it to you. So eat up, Beasts. Eat. - It's more complicated than I thought. - But we are willing to do that for them. Well! First question: We asked you to ask us questions about purchases. - Me? - Well, we asked them. - You asked me? - We... you asked... we asked... you. - We -- we asked -- like this -- they asked.

And the first question comes from Micah GROSS, who asks: "How do I choose the

fast

est pay

line

?" - Oh... - Great question! -You know, for years, he would walk up to me at the

checkout

line

and say, "I need to know how to do this!" - A system. You need a system. - I need to have a system, so... - We have your system. - ...we finally found out. The first thing you should do is look for the smartest cashier. Choose a cashier with glasses. Because they are very good at scanning. You think glasses make you smarter, huh? - Yes, and they make you good at scanning. - Well.

Alright. The second thing you should do is look at the cashier and see: is the cashier smiling? Is the cashier friendly? - Yes. - Don't go to that ATM... - Mm-mm. No. ...Because that cashier is going to want to talk about trivial things... - Oh, no. - ...and slow down the line. - I do not want that. - No, you want to go to the most intimidating and cruelest looking ATM you can. - Sullen! - Sullen! Like a pirate. - Yes. - Like... the cashier wants... But not an eye patch, because you want depth perception. - Good. - You want them to have a lot of depth: perception. - But if it looks like they could suffocate you... slam the door, yes.

Get in line for that. Like a fighter! Okay, but that's just the cashier, because you also have to worry about the people in line. Now, a lot of people say, "Well, of course, you don't support someone who has a lot of stuff in their cart. (Laughing) Oh, it's not that simple. Pfffft. - No, no, no, no, no, no , no... - Pfffft. It's about what's in the cart, but you know what? You don't even have to look... inside the cart. - Tell them Rhett! - Okay. - Tell them! What slows down the line is the product! - Plastic bag. - People confuse zucchini with cucumbers: "Hey, what is this?

Number (gibberish noises). They have to weigh it, sometimes they have to count things... That's a waste of time! - I saw a wheel in a place... - Oh, yes. The wheel! - produce -- "What number of zucchini?..." - ...they were looking over the wheel... - "...Pickles? I don't know." - No, uh-uh. Listen, the thing is, you want people on processed, pre-packaged foods, because... that stuff just... boop-boo-boo-boo-boo! - Bar Scan: Bloop! Bloop! Bloop! Bloop! It moves right through there! So what you can look for are the less healthy people. People who seem to have gotten carried away: Get behind those people!

They are receiving processed food. , and that line will move so

fast

that you won't know what hit you. - Mmm... CHOKE-SLAM! Next question. - Selena, also known as "Linkypoostalker"... - Okay. ...question: "How?" Can I shop when I don't have money?" Okay, well, if you don't have money, sometimes you can be surprised by how many things you have in your own home! Things you forget you actually own! It's like shopping in your own home You know, that makes me think, my neighbor just started a YouTube channel... - Yes, the YouTube channel! - ...and I think it would be perfect... - Oh, yeah. - ... to give a complete answer to this question, judging by your front yard... - Mm-hm. - ...I think you'll have some idea. ♪ (clink) ♪ Hello, this is Bevin.

As you can see, I've been! shopping! The wall of trash separating the third bedroom from the rest of the house fell down yesterday, opening up a whole new world of shopping for me; rediscovering items that I can experience again for the first time! The first thing I discovered was this canned whole chicken. The expiration date is... "1999". Which is fine, because like fine wine, canned whole chickens get better with age! And then, of course, what... what do I wash my chickens with? whole canned chickens but with a drink purchased in bulk? Under the bed, I have a stash of half-drunk Gatorades, and each one has been tested for quality.

Speaking of which, I'll try one right now, because I'm a little thirsty. Maybe it's dark. (sniff) I think that's urine. Ah! Oh, look, it's my half-brother Donny. Say "hello", Donny. I didn't know you were down there, I thought you moved in 2009... Then I went to the guest bathroom and found this amazing pair of boots. They were a real bargain. Well, technically it's just a boot, but technically it was also an actual robbery. I stole them from my neighbor when he lived in his attic without his knowledge or consent. And just when I thought he had bought everything, I dug up the corpse of my favorite cat, Snowball.

I just had to search through 85 other live cats to get to him. (meowing) - What did you find, Donny? (torn sound) - Oh! (aggressive meow) - They're hungry, be careful! The cat goes to the bathroom. Right on the back of my portrait! Oh how horrible. (burping sound) You know, he mentioned that he lived in his neighbor's attic... Do you think that's your attic? - No, because that was me playing a... character. - (gasp) Chase Hinton asks, "What do you do if you can't reach something on the shelf?" - I do not understand the question. - How about?

If there's something on the top shelf, you can't reach it. What do you do for a living? Are there shelves that have things you can't reach? Is this a thing? - This happens? - Yeah. I mean, think about it, like... a very high shelf. - I'm thinking about it; I can't imagine it. That has literally never happened to me. (whispers) Because I'm so tall! - Let's make a "Song for when!" - Let's do it! - Gary Rardon, "gfunk0831..." - Oh, 0831, that's the best "gfunk". ...he said he needs a # song for when you run out of toilet paper!

That can be organized! - This is a "Song for when"... - ...you run out of toilet paper. ♪ I've been on this "john" for too long, playing Candy Crush. ♪ ♪ Before my legs fall completely asleep, I better finish and wash up. ♪ ♪ So, without even looking, I reach out to grab some TP squares. ♪ ♪ But, to my utter horror, there are no more squares there. ♪ ♪ I wonder if it would hurt if I used the cardboard roll. ♪ ♪ I'm pretty sure it would work, but could I get down from the container? ♪ ♪ And maybe the toilet brush could work, but those bristles are a little scary. ♪ ♪ And what about that embroidered towel they gave me when I got married? ♪ She would never forgive me. ♪ So I'm going to let it dry...

Just let it be... ♪ ♪ I'm going to let it dry like a dog on a leash. ♪ ♪ I'm going to let it dry; ventilate it with the breeze. ♪ ♪ I'm going to let him dry like he's a chimpanzee. ♪ ♪ I see a curling iron and some matches, but I can't find any cotton balls. ♪ ♪ There are nail clippers, a plunger, and a Lionel Richie poster on the wall. ♪ He would never forgive me. ♪ So I'm going to let it dry... No one has to know... ♪ ♪ I'm going to let it dry like it's a buffalo. ♪ ♪ I'm going to let it dry like a bird in flight. ♪ ♪ I'm going to let it dry;

I'll take a shower tonight. ♪ ♪ I'm going to let it dry; I'll take a shower tonight. ♪ ♪ I'm going to let it dry; I'll take a shower tonight. ♪ Hey, we want to write more "Songs for When" and of course we want to get those ideas from you; So use #SongForWhen and tell us any situation (stuttering)... - (imitating gibberish) - ...any situation or need where a song - can be useful. - Yes, any "sit." Thank you for liking, commenting, subscribing and sharing this video with your friends and family. - Do you know what time it is! Hi, I'm Ben from Moosomin, Saskatchewan, Canada.

And it's time... to spin the Wheel of Mythology. - Submit your ideas for the Mythology Wheel using #GMMWheel. Send it in, we could do it! End the episode with that! Click on Good Mythical More, where we will open your email and test the "Eggtractor". You push it down here, and the egg falls, and that's the theme song. I'm looking forward to it... "Rhett forgets how to use a computer." - Here you go, man. I have this... - WOW! - ...for you, it's a computer! - What is that, a mouth? - Well, it's a computer! - What did you put there? - He's a data man! - Apparently, pickled pig's feet. - (laughs) - (loud snort) Man!

You've been feeding this thing well! Look at that, it's flexible! (animal noise) - Pet him. - No, man, you write. And you... It has like a silver back, is it a gorilla? ...open it. Open it. You write in your mouth. - It's a gorilla that's just a mouth! - Open your mouth, put your hands in... - Look at that! - ...put your hands on the tongue. Hello Mr. Gorilla, how did you get out of the zoo? - Listen Listen. Open... - I am very proud of you and your new pet. ♪ (ending music) ♪ - Come to daddy, my egg face. (laughs) (loud whistle) - Ahhhhh! (laughter)