Drew Barrymore Interviews with Oprah, Dr. Bruce Perry and Dionne Warwick | Full EpisodeJun 11, 2021
today in draw, the one and only
oprahwinfrey, this is because of you, draw, you have changed my life, we all prosper in this world through friendship, gail was my calm and safe place, it makes me want to cry now, thinking about It all starts now, please, welcome to draw.
barrymoreback to you guys hello vff we have a very special guest today i'm going to get into it she needs no introduction she's the only
oprahwinfrey hey this is the loudest thing we've done since we started in august just us in a very big room, sort of uh starting at an unprecedented time, um, welcome to the show, dare I say, maybe you've seen it, yes, I have seen it, and I can say, dare I say, watching it really changed my life, you You have changed. my life, you certainly changed my work life because I was there for that first show where you smiled at cameron and there was everyone and we, you know, I didn't know they weren't all in the same space, I saw that and I said hey, why We can't do what Drew did and since then why can't we do what you did?
And from that moment in conversations with Oprah for Apple TV, the first time I did it was with President Barack Obama talking about his fiancé's book. we landed and there we were sitting across from each other in my living room in front of the fireplace and I said so this is thanks to you so thank you I'm a woman I have to thank you so much because you didn't need to give us the credit but you did and for those who don't know, here's a little recorded snippet about the technology that oprah and I talked about when we launched this show in the middle of a pandemic, we had to get creative with the magic. of technology we came up with a way to transport our guests from our studio right here to new york how cool is it that we met a person who also thought the same thing it's oprah it's oprah it's oprah oh brother um yeah, oprah was inspired to use A similar green screen technology for interviewing guests like President Barack Obama Listen, we may not be able to be in the same room, but we sure can feel it and look like it.
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drew barrymore interviews with oprah dr bruce perry and dionne warwick full episode...
Thank you so much because I'm going to be really Honestly, I haven't really admitted it out loud, but it was really scary for me to be, you know, a girl, a woman, I don't know what, I'm a woman, asking people to take this risk. and spend this money and ask ourselves. these questions and I am very grateful to my bosses who allowed us to do this because this was a control and a risk of not happening and I want to ask you is where we are going, the water is out of the water. the bottle people are not going to travel like before people have become comfortable with interview styles some are going to show up some are not going to have access to more people than ever in some way because technology is everything it's going to be maybe a mix and if it's not, we have to make it the best and most compelling television in honor of the audience.
Yeah, I agree with that a thousand percent and I think that's why I say, really, literally. they have changed my life and when people say that I said it because listen after Drew I'm not going anywhere and so the truth is you can have better access and I think there will certainly be times in our lives and in our careers when we are directly in front of the person makes a big difference and may be necessary, but I think in terms of having access to anyone in the world at any time, what you all did on that first show lit the way for change.
This will be forever and I'm sure we would have done it today, but you know I'm in a place where there's no studio, so I'm like in the middle of nowhere. Here you need a study to be able to do it. You really do it there. It was a study within 500 miles, I would have done it, I am very happy and I hope that we do it again in the future because I was very happy to see you accept this, recognize us and move forward in this way because it becomes a new normal and for the girl who felt really honest again, this is the part I don't talk about, is when you're fighting for things in business, it's not comfortable, especially when they're not finished, you feel like the mess you feel. like the one who might be spending people's money inappropriately, you don't know if the risk is going to pay off, but you step into your convictions and fight for them, so when I saw you embracing technology, I told that person. who hung up the phone that day because I remember saying listen guys, we have to do this, we have to find a new way for our television future, this is not funny, we are in a really unprecedented time and we can't go.
We continue the program at home forever, we just can't, you did what I had to do a thousand times over the years and when I started, let me applaud you for doing what every person, especially every woman, needs to learn. as soon as possible, your instinct is right for you, so when you feel something in your gut and you think, "wow, I need to do this, I really need to move on", that means it's right for you, it doesn't mean it's right for you. all. more and I think it takes a long time for women to be affirmed in their own beliefs and that's why we were the number one talk show for 25 years because I always came back to what do I feel, what do I feel is my true intention in do this and I can't do it if it's not true for me, even if everyone else says and a lot of times you know the producers would come with ideas and I would say I can't do that.
I don't know, I don't know how I can sit in that chair and keep a straight face and do that and do that. I'm not going to be able to do it, so I applaud you for following your instinct because Your instinct is always the right one for you, well, I think you've given a lot of courage to everyone, especially women, to fight for what we believe in. I was going to ask if you had any advice. Can I ask you when you finished your first season? and you knew you were just around the corner for season two, what were you saying to yourself?
I was actually telling myself that you were right because, like most people don't know this now, but when we launched it in 1986, I had been a local talk show. In Chicago for two years, what I understood was that there is something common in our human experience and that people in Chicago are no different than people in New York, people in Idaho, and people in Rhode Island when it comes to the core. You know everyone is very divided about their politics and beliefs, etc., but I still believe deep down that we are all equal. If you ask the blue states, the red states, the purple states, what you really care about, the answer is the same. people care about their families, they care about being able to live a decent life, they care about being able to do it comfortably and do it with a sense of peace and um, I still think despite all the madness, despite all the divisions that What everyone talks about all the time is that we are, they, we are more similar than different, which is a very famous quote from Maya Angelou, she used to say that all the time and in our humanity we are, all of us. we are simply. looking for the same things and that's what this platform that offers the Drew Barrymore show every day is an opportunity for those of us like-minded those of us who are looking for joy who wants to wear some bows I was extra joyful for you I was like bones and flowers it's oprah like i was surprised not to have bells and like a boa when we come back even more with oprah don't go anywhere what i realized is that gail was my regulation it makes me want to cry now thinking about it and it goes on being the person in my life.
I probably have three people in my life who will tell me the truth no matter what. Here's the takeaway that really was the biggest epiphany for me. Welcome back. We're here with Oprah Winfrey. I'm doing Drew, I'm doing Drew right now, just hi Gail, yeah, she's waving, she's waving to you. I just want to say that I think the three of us should get together. You know, I think that would be a lot. funny yeah when this pancake mix is done let's make sure that happens. Drew, it's okay, gayle, I'll talk to you later. You know we all believe we thrive in this world through friendship.
You know that many of them know children and marriages. friends were there at the beginning they will be there until the end they are these types of relationships for life it is different than blood family it is a choice but it feels so intimate and loyal and your friendship with gail has been something you know that we all aspire because we want that kind of friendship in our life and by the way, now you have Oprah Daily, which I mentioned to Gail that I thought Oprah Daily, the daily word, is so brilliant, well, thank you, thank you, I wanted to, of done, I came.
I continued with that because I wanted it to be what I realized is that the Oprah show was a habit, just like the Drew Barrymore show, people are creating a habit around that and that's what you want, to be your main viewer, who you talk to every day and the idea of having a daily point of inspiration, a daily quote, something daily that you can rely on to give you a little boost, you know my goal throughout my life, even before that I could articulate it, it's how to bring a light into people's lives, how do you let them see the best in themselves?
How do you allow them to grow into who they are? Which is what each of us truly aspires to do, whether you can express it yourself or not, just you. you just want to become more solid, you want to have the ability to have the
fullest expression of yourself as a human being and you do that through habits, rituals, creating a space where you can give back to yourself in a way that allows you to flourish, so We are turning it into what I know it will be in the future, it is a daily place of inspiration for everyone, so thank you for mentioning that we need you daily.
I listen to your channel xm seriously during my pregnancies and Yes, it was my daily north star, it was my daily dose, thank you for that, it's true, I will never forget the story you told about Gail getting water for the traffic policeman and how at that moment She was such an important and good person. she was the mother of her son because she was showing him the kind of person she should be and that gave me hope because I felt so lost. What model do I have to follow to become a father? I was very scared and thought when I heard that. story, if I can be an example for my children, maybe I won't have to turn to my past or even fight against it, I can try to be myself and that can give me hope to be a good father, that story literally changed my life.
It was um, so thank you for that. Well, you know, Gail goes on a date and she always says, "Well, all parents do it, so I'll pass." I don't know, they don't have a date. Gail is to date the best model mother I have ever seen. I've never seen anyone more committed and respectful of their children and when he first had children, you know, because we were best friends, we met at a television station in Baltimore and once he got married and had children, I thought there would be distance in our relationship because she's not going to have time to, you know, dedicate to our friendship and that didn't happen, but what happened every time she was on the phone with me and one of her children came into the room, she stopped. she would hang up the phone even if she didn't hang up the phone they would be acknowledged that she was present there for them she would say mom is on the phone now with annie oh and morning bear he calls kirby bear tomorrow she there was an acknowledgment and and what she would have What to say over the years is mutual respect and I know we will talk later about the topic of what happened to you, but one of the things that dr.
perryin this book is that when children grow up they wake up and realize that they are not getting the respect they deserve from their parents, that changes who they are, what their children want and this is really true for everyone, they want to know who You are, you are here, you see me. that you see me and you hear me and that you care and that's true for everyone else in your life too let's get even more personal with oprah stay here we're back with the one and only oprah winfrey talking about this extraordinary book i've been reading and I will always have the painting that dr.
perryput in the book in terms of the inverted triangle the inverted triangle what do you guys talk about in terms of the impression that children are I was left at such a young age that I think it was talked about at least during my growing up.
I think even when I almost had kids, I feel like they're all gone, they won't realize it when they're young and I did. I don't understand why that was the notion, it didn't seem right, it didn't feel right, but I wanted to believe it because that's what so many people had said. Here's the bottom line that really was the biggest epiphany for me all these years. I've done several shows where people say exactly what you just said, Drew, oh, they won't remember, you know, yeah, I'm in an abusive relationship and as soon as you know it, when the kids are little, when they grow up.
I'm moving I'm getting out of a relationship The most damage occurs between zero and two months because that's the time when the brain absorbs everything and anyone who has had children knows this because they cansee him. That whole process of language socialization, how do they learn the word dad, how did they learn mom, how do they learn spoon, how did they learn?, while they assimilate all that, when the brain is more open and receptive, they are also assimilating. in all the other things that changed everything for me in terms of how people raise their children and how we view what you do in front of younger children. does it matter, you know, I have a question, um, and that is, when I was born, my dad had separated from my mom and um, I just didn't know him, he was very abusive, he would come and destroy the house, uh, he was. scary and you know there are a lot of people and you share a story of what happened the first night you stayed with your mom in milwaukee and for people who had one or two parents who didn't want to be in their children's lives no matter what they were their reasons, which is valid for them, it is very difficult for a child to understand what you are talking about with themselves or with other people who have had that type of start in their lives and who are dealing with that type of trauma that you talk about. the eyes and the loved one and the being configured correctly what happens when you are not so here is the good news about all this because we have all had things happen to us that have happened to us and that have not happened to us in our lives that made us feeling unwanted and unimportant, everyone has done it at some point in their life, even if you come from the best of circumstances, it is possible to take your post-traumatic pain and turn it into post-traumatic power and wisdom.
Know this for sure that anything that has happened to you can also be for you if you allow it to be what has healed me the most is taking the pain that I endured, suffered, survived as a child and turned it inside out, that is why I Created my school specifically looking for girls who were like me, who came from poor backgrounds, who came from dysfunctional backgrounds and who often felt unwanted, unloved, how can I create an environment for them? How can I give back? This is how you save yourself How can I do it? I give back what was not given to me and when you can do that you begin to fill the void within yourself that giving back has truly become what my legacy is and I will share this with you that I was sitting with maya angelou after I came back from the opening of my school and I said: oh, this will be the school, this will be my greatest legacy, I mean these girls, this is it, this is what my life was for and she said: "you have I have no idea which It's going to be your legacy and I said oh no no no no my you she should have been there I'm telling you that's going to be the school and she said I said you have no idea what your legacy is going to be it's every life you touch your legacy isn't your name on a school or any other building your legacy is every life you touch so I tell you this draw
barrymoreyour legacy this is what maya told me everyone who ever watched a show and I decided to go back to school I'm going to go on a diet.
I'm going to treat myself better. I'm going to leave an abusive relationship. Every life that you have touched and that has experienced your voice and your power. of your platform, that's your legacy and that's why we trust Oprah and I just want to also say that you said this is the good news, which to me is one of the most positive and powerful ways to engage minds and hearts. of people because It's so hopeful that we'll take a short commercial break when we get back. We will continue this conversation. The co-author of What Happened to You, Dr.
Bruce Perry, will be with us. We'll be right back. Welcome again. We are here with Oprah Winfrey and we come together as one of the leading authorities on brain trauma and founder of the Academy of Childhood Trauma. He is the co-author of What Happened to You. I'm Dr. Bruce Perry. Hello Dr. Perry. Hello Dr. Dr. Perry. Perry, it's good to see you again. I was listening and I have to say, isn't that amazing? Yeah, well, I think the fact that you guys came together says a lot about each of you and Dr. Perry, you've been an expert in child development and the impacts of trauma on our brain for the last 30 years and you say there is a misconception that trauma is a big unwanted tragic event in our lives, but do you think it has to be big or can it be?
There are times when everyone has a journey and on that journey there's just no way you're going to come out unscathed, so like you say, it doesn't always have to be this big catastrophic disaster that everyone would point to and say, oh. that's trauma, yes, exactly, more often than not it's smaller things, right, I mean, it's the things that appear on Oprah and I've talked about this a lot, we talk about this in the book, but one of the most important things about To be a human being is to feel. how you belong how you belong to your family you belong to your community you belong to your culture and if you receive signals from your parents or your classmates that you don't belong and those signals may come from something like their implicit prejudice that you are of the wrong religion or that you have the wrong skin color or that you have the wrong ethnicity and if you have these little ongoing stressors that you have no control over, over time that changes the systems in your body that control stress. and it can really have a profound impact on your mental health and your physical health and when it comes to the brain, can we rebuild what wasn't there?
Can we regulate, relate and reason? Yes, well the good news is that the brain is changeable and if given opportunities with enough repetition, these systems in our brain that have been impacted by our past experiences can begin to normalize and become more typically regulated and ultimately , it can be healed. Oprah said something about how there is good news and we can exploit the holes. that have been given and granted to us in our lives and turn them into our strength, turn them into the signs of how we treat other people. Has there been an Oprah point in your life where someone else had to fill those holes?
I think for me that if those were teachers, I wouldn't be who I am, that's why I have so much love for teachers, I mean, if someone calls me a teacher, I literally start as if you were a teacher because in my life the Teachers were my saviors when I went to school, it was important and that's where my sense of identity and dignity came from, not from my family but from other people, and Bruce said and this is true for all of us, no one makes it out of here alone and our connection with others. people our relationships with people who can see us all you need is one person who sees you
fully and believes and that's what you hold on to, that you're seeing that you're valued and that you matter and I, what I realized, I don't I did.
Even sharing this with you, Dr. Perry, what I realized is that Gail was my regulation, it makes me want to cry. Now, thinking about it, every night after the show, I would come home and have these sessions with Gail, where he would talk about what happened. on the show or it didn't happen on the show donna and that was the way I regulated myself so I would talk to gail before I went to bed and then I would be calmer and it wasn't until I not only co-authored the book but I actually went back and re-read the book and realized that oh Gail was what I use for my sense of regulation and is still the person in my life.
I probably have three people in my life who are going to tell me the truth, no. No matter, I thank you both so much for your time and I love this book so much. What happened? by Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Bruce Perry is available now wherever books are sold and each of our VFFs will receive a copy. From this book I just want to say that Dr. Perry and I have also been for the last two years together with Prince Harry and Apple. We've been working on this series about mental health that's coming out in May on Apple and you know what our mental well-being is our mental health being able to reach your best self is part of my goal in life and now, as you know, I can spend my days doing exactly what I want to do, I mean I'm still uh the kind of person that wants to use my life to help other people have the best of them because I think I have the best life ever and I think that comes of doing the work by peeling back the layers and That certainly starts with looking at what happened to you, so thank you for the opportunity to talk about it and share it with other people.
Thanks and check out the conversation you had with Megan and Prince Harry. I think that will change the world and change the future, so with every conversation you too can make history. Thank you for changing the future thanks to oprah and dr. Perry. If you would like to attend the virtual book tour of oprah and dr. perry, visit our website at the
drewberrymoreshow.com for more information. all the information you need thanks so much guys we'll be right back welcome back our next guest is a James Beard award winning co-host of the Netflix show The Chef and author of one of my all time favorite cookbooks. my city my food he is the chef and founder of koji BBQ the godfather of the food truck movement someone who is an incredible philanthropist and really shows what is possible in the culinary world as far as caring for people as a girl growing up in Los Angeles, this man has my heart, he always had it, it's always okay, ladies and gentlemen, I'm about to have a bucket list moment because it's Roy Choi, hey Drew, you're one of my favorite chefs on this planet, I'm actually melting here, thank you.
You deserve to be. I've been a big fan of yours for years. Okay, I'm really excited about the way I'm going to show a photo. This is my kitchen. By the way. This is part of my cookbook. collect your cookbook la sun and these are all your sauces and i have to say roy choi you have done it once again they were the best sauces i have ever had in my life and funnily enough i combined two on the plate because i was slurping it and everyone started running together first, they were carefully in their corners and as I brushed against it everything coagulated and salivated, that's amazing, that's exactly, I mean, you did exactly what I wanted people to do with these sauces because we created these the sauces They should be almost like crayons, you know, you can do whatever you want with them, they're very easy, you just pour them together, you make your own sauce with the sauces and that was the idea behind it all and I'll show you. how easy it is so the first one is Korean barbecue marinade so for you as a cook all you have to do is pour it in just pour it in and mix it so I think you've got some cooking there. yeah, but I want to show you, so this is what I just poured right now and then this is after a couple of hours here and you see how it breaks down and then what we want to do is just put it on the iron. um but yeah so you just want to roast this and then while it's roasting add these onions and cilantro so this is just chopped onion, chopped cilantro, lime juice and a little bit of salt oh my gosh this smells so good, very good, right?
It doesn't smell amazing, perfect, I'm right there with you and now we're going to let that do its job and we're going to move on and we're going to start our quesadilla here, okay. the quesadilla on the griddle or in the pan and then go ahead um and then go ahead and put a layer of cheese on top, we'll make a nice generous layer, you know, I like messy food, thank goodness, it's okay to surround the edges almost almost. Encourage it to go outside the lines that you know here and just let it fall off the edges, so you have to keep an eye on your omelet.
What we're looking for here is obviously you want the cheese to melt, but what we want down here we want to create these blisters inside the tortilla and now what we're going to do is take that cooked meat and go over one side like it's a half moon and then once you do that, let's flip it over and then once you flip it over, give it a good press. Let's turn it over. Look at yourself every time you turn it around. I want you to give it a little pressure. Give him some love. Press like this.
Yes, I'm spanking. mine again keep pressing it and now we're almost ready, let's go to the cutting board, look at that, okay, let's go to the cutting board and then on the cutting board we're going to cut this thing. into four slices so just cut them in half and then cut the halves again oh you're doing great you're doing fantastic look at that there you go and just think about pizza slices oh my gosh there you go and then what we do. What I want to do is have our orange chili sauce and just drizzle it over the top, just drizzle it over the top.
I'm going to use some Jackson Pollock splatter. I don't know why, there you have it and then you can, you can embellish if you want. I'd like it with a little bit of cilantro and then that's your kogi ribs sweet chili quesadilla. Now, is it okay if I try this? Yes, oh my God, thank you, oh my God, that's it, look how beautiful it is. Thank you so much, Roy Joy, you have been my Hero since I was expecting, I love your food so much, Roy Choi, it is an honor and a pleasure to finally meet you as a big fan and a girl, oh my goodness, thank you so much for this recipe and for get your koji sauces. that will change your life visit the
drewbermarshow.com roy choi it is an honor that this is the first of many thank you thank you thank you welcome back it's time for Drew's news your good news puppy who always brings that good newspaper and look at me in thedesk i'm a man who does an excellent dog impression ross matthew oh hi i think i think my dog impression is a little difficult first order of business ross stain states yes we're on this it was just yesterday and we found out about this hashtag It's a pink thing, the magic tub of cleaning goo takes over the ticking, so we all have a little crayon here, a marker, and I said, listen, you've got to put some spaghetti sauce on it because to me It's a real stain test, so I've never done it.
I tried this so I don't really know what I'm facing. It's okay, even though you love the spots, that nothing is okay, it's really working, this is very exciting, I mean, look at my frozen face, I'm looking at you, you've never been happier about anything, look at that, it's all gone , hello, yes, thank you all, I know, are you satisfied? Well, I know what I'll do with the rest of my life. Well, we have an icon behind the scenes. Okay, is this really happening because I heard someone was going to be here and I can't even understand it?
We've been asking you for a while because we're big fans of yours for everything you've done in your life and also the really fun world you've created on Twitter that has everyone on your Twitter feed and on your Twitter account by far. traffic. As we know the big Bridger fan Tin and she has been demanding the return of the duke, please welcome someone who we have been waiting in anticipation and who we have had the pleasure and honor of speaking with, please welcome Welcome to the six-time Grammy Award-winning icon and queen of the Twitterverse. now Dion Warwick the legend we know you're our sister in Bridgerton Hood right uh and uh a topic near and dear to your heart is reggae john page uh gq says the handsome duke should be the next james bond uh I would see that someone needs replace daniel craig, he's retiring from bond after his fourth and final uh double o7 movie, no time to die and um reggae is in the mix, do you think that would be good honey, from what I can tell? you can do whatever you want, I totally agree now that there are other names in the mix, let's see there is a Michael B Jordan that would be cool too, right, Harry Styles is in the mix, what do you think of Harry Styles?
No, well, I feel like I love it. other masculine ideas but I still vote for reggae jean paige
dionnewhat do you think yeah that's a bit like it has a heartbeat right there you know what I'm saying I've always been with james brown represented that sex symbol but I still swab and yeah, yeah, There was also one of the name. I want to know your opinion about Idris Elba. Absolutely incredible, yes, it's another heart. You know, I saw him once outside the Golden Globes and he said that he needed his car, which is like me. one in this other story he said: I need the car, we have to get in the car, look, that already makes a good bond, he has a place to go, I have to get in the car, like crime has dissolved, of course, I wanted to stop and chat. with him but I thought he really looks like he needs to get somewhere so I'm not going to bother him now but it was driving me crazy because he was next to interstellar but this was like I don't know 12 years ago. rubbing elbas yes I was, I had the pleasure of meeting him at the premiere of one of his movies, I actually don't remember the name of the movie and I met his daughter, so I met his fiancée at the time, oh oh, I said charming young man, right, I love him, okay, next story, we are talking about the latest in bridal fashion, the new bridal trend that is appearing on the Internet is the bridal bucket hat, it is the bucket hat that the movie The 90s made it famous, but in bridal white, on the other hand, not.
I know why the '90s movies made him famous. I think the fishermen made this face. Yes, it's a bit like Dion's fish stick. I'd love to know your opinion on this. I don't know why some particularly correct pride wants to look like a fisherman. The bell. It's the mystery, you know, that's the mysterious part of being a bride when no one really sees, they anticipate that the veils will be lifted, they'll see that beautiful face, I'm getting married soon, do you think I should wear a veil? Oh no, got it, thanks. Write it down, okay Dion, you've spread so much joy this year via Twitter and now we're going to have even more Dion at a live-streamed concert event, right?
Yes, that's right, Mother's Day, May 9, will be a wonderful, wonderful evening, we did one for Easter and it went exceptionally well, we had a lot of fun, people appreciated it and they missed the music, like me, Mother's Day the mother, may 9, google dion
warwickdoug mandolin and we will all spend the afternoon. and night together I'll be there we can't wait for that thank you Dion Warwick for finally joining us here on the show where there's nothing but love for you thank you I appreciate it and you guys take good care of yourselves please welcome back before. come on, I've got a quick pick from our little yellow book and that's our list of things that we love and want to share with you and we update it all the time it's on our website and today it's all the comfy goodness you can get. get to barefoot dreams now listen, this is a family owned company based in malibu, california that makes the most comfortable and cozy blankets, sleepwear, robes and clothing for kids and i have one of these blankets and my My children and I fought over her and I have to tell you that you will never feel anything like this.
This is like a hybrid blanket, the coziest, fluffiest towel you'll ever feel. You know, I don't know how they do it, but the good news is that they do and it's the perfect gift for Mother's Day, but as a special gift for our amazing vff. Guess what everyone will get 300 to spend on barefoot. Hey, and then you and your family members can fight about it. Thank you very much for spending time with us and we'll see. very soon you dream barefoot it's something chic how you have it hanging over your shoulder
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