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Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Skills | Counselor Toolbox Podcast with Dr. Dawn-Elise Snipes

Jun 29, 2020
Hello everyone and welcome to today's presentation on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy


for the next few minutes as we discuss the purpose of a CT. We'll re-examine what mindfulness is, talk briefly about how acting out differs from other mindfulness-based approaches and what's unique about acting out, then we'll move on to just talking about the destructive normalcy I knew avoidance experienced. Finally, we move on to general therapeutic interventions and discuss how to deal with clients' agendas. and they want us to eliminate the problem and take action, they want us to really face it and say, are we talking about eliminating something or just changing the way we experience it, and then we work with control in mind because too often the problem is that the People try to control their depression they control their anxiety and the more they try to control it the more out of control it seems and we'll end up looking into the six core principles of A. ct why we care as usual not all interventions fit all people.
acceptance and commitment therapy skills counselor toolbox podcast with dr dawn elise snipes
What we want to do is find a bunch of tools that we can offer in our


to present to clients that will build on their strengths if we hear anything that sounds like CT or CBT or experiential interventions we know this is where we want to go. to help clients learn how to deal with life on life's terms in a way that is meaningful to them; you can't stop the waves but you can learn to surf you can't stop bad things from happening you know bad things happen sometimes and it just sucks but you can learn to deal with it in a way that is less counterproductive to your health and happiness distract yourself from the heartbreak It's like constantly running from your own shadow, I thought about it for a few minutes, and it makes sense to try to control the negative thoughts and feelings we have from losing other situations in life if you're constantly running from that shadow, you don't focus on anything but it happens all around you which means other things can weaken you and cause you more distress even if you figure out how to walk away from your shadow so the acronym accept your reactions and be present says don't change it don't judge don't say just accept it it is what it is pick a value address then act it all seems pretty simple but it's not if it were us No clients would already do this p But it is based on relational frame theory, a psychological theory of human language, developed in large part through the efforts of Stephen C Hays of the University of Nevada Reno and Dermot Barnes Holmes of the National University of Ireland, Maynooth. rational.
acceptance and commitment therapy skills counselor toolbox podcast with dr dawn elise snipes

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acceptance and commitment therapy skills counselor toolbox podcast with dr dawn elise snipes...

Framework theory argues that the building block of higher cognition or reasoning becomes our ability to create connections between things, so much of the technical idol for when we see things we articulate in terms that are meaningful to us us, that it is terrifying, that it is wonderful, that it is very depressing. It's the words you use, the way they're conceptualized and stored in your memory, so if you conceptualize something as all or nothing, you end up seeing the world in terms of all or nothing, so what we want to do is look at the language and say: this is the best way to think about it.
acceptance and commitment therapy skills counselor toolbox podcast with dr dawn elise snipes
You know, one of the examples I've used before is the labeling of an event or a behavior instead of a person being children, and I really believe that children are not bad, children make bad decisions, children behave badly, but the children are good but it is mine. and repair and all that kind of stuff that helps people see that and we're going to look at some more examples of how our language can really affect how we interpret something in contextual lists to understand the complexity and richness of an event Completely appreciating participants and functions, let's now think about functional contextualism.
acceptance and commitment therapy skills counselor toolbox podcast with dr dawn elise snipes
The contextual lists say in this context when, when my son was little, we went to different places, and at home he knew what the rules were, he knew that we did not touch the television, he knew everything how it should be, but when we went to the house of my grandmother he had never been before and she had a tv and she had other things and it had rockers and things that we didn't have it was a different situation so the little scientists in him left and he walked over to the tv because he was trying to figure out in this context how i'm supposed to function functional contextualism look where i'm going he walked over to the tv and pointed at it and looked at me and said he wouldn't touch it.
I said that is correct. Shawn, no contact; he played the tv and looked at me and had a timeout. he walked to the corner and sat down, he just wanted to make sure the rules still applied, and it wasn't something you know, I wasn't that good, he does it so it's not clear, or he just tries to figure it out and once he gets it realized that it didn't bother television again, and that's why I want you to get out of it, that people will behave differently in different situations and that they behave differently in different situations because there are different variables in playing . behave differently when I'm presenting then I do when I'm stoned with my friends at the gym and I'm sure you behave differently at work than you do at home than when you're out at night with your friends you know town it's about of the context and what is the most functional choice of behavior at that moment, for people to learn language through interactions with the environment, we have to focus on changing variables in the context, some things cannot be changed with my grandmother there we could not only get the stuff out of the tv but it would not have been practical so we had to work on the variables variables in the environment we want to help people create rules of thumb to influence psychological events like thoughts, feelings and behavioral variables can include environmental variables, can include triggers, can include how you interact with different people.
You know, maybe someone has issues with authority figures that will affect how they interact with people at work and maybe how they interact at home, so we want to keep that in mind when someone speaks up about an authority issue. anger management, I want to know about it, but I want to know in each context when we talk about personality disorders, we talk about a continuous pattern of behavior, this pattern of behavior exists in various settings, so I want to know what was the context that controlled the variables that behavior was because it usually presents as a disturbance, we can see that the behavior and choices made in those contexts were probably unhelpful or inappropriate.
The purpose of the act is to create most of our other interventions a meaningful life, as we accept the pain in it, it inevitably continues, there will be times when things just suck and I'm sorry it happens, you know people leave. , you will have losses, you will have disappointments, but it doesn't last forever, important, we help people understand when they create this rich and meaningful life, it's okay, maybe things are not going the way I want. Not now, but let's go back to the basics that it's important to me, and it's important to me that I support him, he's in my life, you know it can be kids, it can be family, it can be your best friend, it can be all of the above.
What is important to me, what are my values? choosing to bet different things things are important to me to have in my life it's important that i have a roof over my head some people will say yes some people will say you know i'm on my friends couch it can crash, or i really don't' I don't want the restrictions and regulations of living in some sort of formal housing, and it's definitely a choice and the experiences that are important to me are the work that is important to me. It's important for me to travel what is important and how I can move towards these goals because we want our decisions to be value based, value driven, a TC is a good shorthand because this


is about effective action. , guided by our deepest values ​​in which we are fully present and the other thing with a CT that we want to remember is like many other things, our values ​​can change over time, yes what was important to you when you were in your twenties probably it wasn't quite the same thing as what's important to you today if you're over 20.
Don't let awareness bring awareness to the here and now experiment with openness and receptivity, awareness doesn't require meditation, and this is something I really want to bring home to some of my clients because I've had situations where I start talking about mindfulness and the clients say no, I won't meditate or I can't meditate, and I try to contradict them, oppose them, and challenge the resistance, but I don't that's where they are now, so I said, how else can we be aware otherwise? we can help you become aware of your here and now, one of the things we did every morning in my residential program and every night clients had to fill out sheets to identify how they feel mentally, physically, emotionally. spiritual social and generally, I mean, there was a lot of thinking there and then they had to identify what stage of readiness for change they were in and why and what they had to identify the behavior that they exhibit that supports that theory and ultimately they had three good things that they did during the day or identify three things they wanted to do during the day if we were talking about in the morning we wanted customers to start being self-aware instead of just getting up and being an autopilot Because we talked about vulnerabilities, we talked to understand that some days you can handle more than others, encouraging clients who are in early recovery from early or late stages of detoxification.
I mean they don't feel so hot so I want to know how they feel because then we can start talking about it's okay you're feeling sluggish today how can we help you with that? Because there will be times when they will bounce back when off treatment and two years in a row when they wake up and they have the flu and they feel bad and they feel sluggish but they have things to do so let's learn how now anyway we wouldn't necessarily require that some people they think it's the best thing in the world, and if they can meditate wonderfully because meditation has so many benefits, some of our clients who have anxiety disorders who have ADHD or have a long history of trauma, at least in the early stages of meditation treatment , they may have trouble quieting their thoughts, it's really scary for them because they know they spend most of their life just in their thoughts keep their eyes on, they don't go there mentally, where the facets of consciousness are living in the present moment, so again how are you and for many of our customers who are looking at you may be fine, and if you are in circle os of recovery is, you know well it's an acronym, you can look up what it means, but basically it means you're no good, it's just a knee-jerk reaction, we want to ask you emotionally right now how you're feeling cognitively How you're feeling, and physically, if you can get All three, you really need to be more in the moment, encourage them to be fully engaged in what they're doing, instead of just getting lost in their thoughts, if they go for a walk, notice what's going on, notice what's going on. birds in the leaves, in the kittens that hide under the camper, what they see they hear they smell, sometimes we let customers out Walking around, we had a three acre campus, they had to go for a walk and come back, and then they would talk in group or or what they saw, smelled, etc.
It's amazing that there are ten people out there and you probably get six or seven different perspectives of what was there, you know there was a lot of overlap, but inevitably there were things that one person noticed that no one else was paying attention to. a, it also means that your feelings can be what they are instead of trying to control them, I have a friend right now who is very stressed, and he is stressed that he is stressed, and I am like you know what we think, you are stressed about everything what I know is happening in your life.
You have a reason to be stressed. Let's accept that this is where this is where we want to go instead of trying to tell him not to stress or call him whiny. I don't like it very much, but a lot of people can't handle it. As a therapist, coach, or friend, we want to encourage people to accept their feelings and accept them. Mindfulness


are divided into four subdivisions; that's what cognitive diffusion is. I can separate myself from my emotions. I don't have to be my emotions, connect with the present moment. How do I feel doing and the me acting?
I like the acting self because it's the fly on the wall, it's the fly sitting, dyed there, watching you go, girl what do you think, how can a TC act of difference be used in a wide variety of populations and settings clinical, because it's not a protocol that needs to be done manually, should that be okay with me?I don't know if my clients can really handle this part; It's a technique that allows therapists to create their own awareness and techniques and individualize, or even create it or create it with clients, and you can go online, and if you pay attention, you'll get literally hundreds. worksheets and worksheet ideas, so if you're stuck, check out the ones I've explored from there, and I think we talked about that in the last session.
The name was five and name five things that occur to you or that you can see right now it's difficult, you already know the wall on the floor and the chair. If people pay more attention to what's going on around them, remember a game many of us play in front of our iPhones when we take long car rides and look at billboards, you'll find billboards that match the alphabet, which will give you it keeps you busy, but it made you aware of what you know, at least visually around you. which is unique to act is not aimed at reduction of symptoms but continuous effort to get rid of symptoms, and this is really important.
So keep me in mind as I read this for a moment, the continued effort to get rid of symptoms creates a clinical disorder; the private experience labeled as an anxiety symptom causes a struggle with the symptom so that you try to control your anxiety and get frustrated that you can't control your anxiety, which makes you feel powerless, which increases your anxiety over the fact that that you can't control it your anxiety makes sense not a symptom it's by definition something pathological and something we should try to get rid of but actually everyone feels that we are anxious with the fight or flight response it's a normal feeling it's what we you can do with what can be pathological.
To identify the feeling, say it well, my body or my brain sees that there is a threat right now, okay, let's see the law, the purpose is to transform and transform our relationships with our difficult thoughts and feelings. learning to see these as harmless, perhaps uncomfortable, passing psychological events, the thought that I can't do this anymore, this is a feeling that is now valid, we must hold on to it and celebrate it, or we can just let the destructive normalcy take over turn off the window I like this term Suppose that the psychological processes of a normal human mind are often destructive and sooner or later create psychological suffering for all of us, postulate that the root of this suffering is human language, and these are some of the things we talk about when you think about the final class and some of the other classes a lot of our mast is formed in early childhood where we think in concrete terms where we live r and relate in concrete terms to all or nothing by focusing on one aspect, of so that the verbal representation of everything that fears or threatens tends not to be as functional as you are an adult and you have more abilities and more independence and more ability to survive on their own.
So it's the language that tells you that I have to do this all the time that I had to, which can cause suffering in remembering the perceptions and schemata that are created by analyzing and comparing planning evaluation. All these processes of remembering and visualizing are based on human language. Think back to a time when you were a child. You think about it, probably, you use words, maybe not out loud, but you talk to yourself, you're like I remember the time you know when I was six and daddy took me on the sleigh across the country, you know you used words with that And I remember how much fun it was now.
I think snowboarding on the toboggan run is fun because that's the only association I really have for it. Think about this. I'm stupid. Remember when I talked about child vs. child behavior versus thinking I'm stupid? I think I'm just a fool now, it's different because thoughts come and go, I can let go of a thought, another example our clients can experience. I can't go on I just can't go on like this. You know right now I don't feel it. can come and go can't come and go am i here or am and you know i really want me to stay here a while longer so we're looking for bert we're talking about attributions we talked about what before global internal stable attributions i'm stupid about i'm stupid about everything I didn't say.
I was stupid with parallel parking. I said he was stupid. It's internal. It means it's part of me. If I get rid of it and get rid of a part of me, what do I do with it? As one of the reasons I don't like to label disorders because people say I'm depressed, you have depressed feelings, now you have symptoms of depression, but you're depressed and I have to be very careful with my language because I'll fall into that trap because it's It's shorter to say that I'm depressed, or that I'm an addict, but people tend to make it too personal and I don't want them to claim the experimental act of evasion that human language naturally creates psychological suffering by preparing us for a battle with our thoughts and feelings. through experiential evasion.
There is a problem. I feel anxious I don't want to feel anxious. My solution. I have to figure out how to get rid of the anxiety or I have to avoid the anxiety and in my attempt to control it I end up making it worse instead of just accepting that it is and eventually it will matter a bit or I will make the choice to do so. something, and we're going to talk about it. The more time and energy we spend avoiding or getting rid of unwanted private experiences, meaning thoughts and feelings, everything that goes on in our head, the more likely we are to get buoyancy and think about the old movies. where someone is in a quicksand pit and the more they struggled the more they sank, that's what happens with our clients, the more they struggle with their concerns with the tools that time has, the more they will sink; what we need to help them do is just accept ok let me relax for a moment im in quicksand let me think about what i am going to do about addiction as more people struggle trying to control their drinking trying to control their addiction like the more they think about drinking the more they think about the porn they want to do it gives them this very strong desire and then they get frustrated especially if they relapse or engage in their behavior then they get frustrated feeling depressed they feel like they don't the behavior is worth going back to because it's a numbing behavior that prevents and creates this whole dynamic of failure, which starts with failure, anxiety and depression are the same thing people often feel, they want to try to get rid of it. so they try to pretend they're not anxious or depressed, they try to confront anxiety or depression, and unfortunately a lot of times they're confronted in not-so-nice ways, so they encourage clients to accept without judgment, and that's so interventionist. actions focus on two main processes that develop


of unwanted private experiences that are beyond personal control when something happens, regardless of whether it's a loud booming noise and you startle it's an anxiety response now i'm off to angry, because I jumped and scared or should I say jumped and scared back to what I will often find people struggling with their anxiety busy frustrated and stuck on the fact that I wouldn't have jumped was stupid. , that was an irrational reaction.
It was what it was, it happened, your body reacted and if we think about it, there is a loud noise that you don't expect, a startle, probably a quite functional reaction, we just let it go, because then your knowledge makes you reason. on a higher level and say no, there is nothing to worry about the car, or something like that and a


and action to live a life of value that does not run into this quickly and so you face the first step on the agenda , the emotional control agenda is gently and respectfully undermined. I like that I'm going to undermine them, but I'll do it with respect.
We want to understand clients and we need to understand if we're going to use this technique to come up with, it's that depression control to control anxiety, while the same things aren't going to happen. , so we need a different approach. Clients identify the difficult ways in which they try to get rid of or avoid unwanted private experiences, this is usually called creative hopelessness, which I really don't want to create hopelessness, but highlights the fact that what you've done in the past hasn't worked, let's see what we could think of that could work and get you closer to the life you want Questions what we ask them.
If it resumes, it will have reduced symptoms in the long run, and of course I hear Dr. Phil, in the back of my mind, it's going well, how is it working for you? What has this strategy cost you in terms of energy? Energy? Vitality and relationships? So fine, you would have thought that for a while or whatever, but at what cost and what did it bring you. closer to the life you normally want if someone is trying to reduce your symptom and you have a lot of costs, it takes you further away from the life you want because what they say, costs are compromises and compromises are usually things that we trade things that If you want other things, facing the agenda is right so we can see that you're trying to control your addiction to depression, anxiety, no matter what it is, you don't work here, it's okay to try something else, then try it this way. control is not control the problem is not the solution and they will look at you like you have three heads and that's okay yes I'm okay with discomfort when emotions and reactions are running high and it leads to a natural level of discomfort physical and emotional and thinking about getting a shot you know I'm a big fag when it comes to getting a shot when I have clean discomfort going to the doctor I'm fine get over it with the nurse.
I would stab myself. I want to be afraid of butter. at the doctor's office and I said oh this just hurts now and my shoulders are going to hurt for the next three days four days apart I go in there and as soon as she puts the alcohol on my arm even if I'm not trying to do it I try to control it I stretch my arm up, which means it not only hurts more, but it bruises and cascades of effects, the same problem with emotions when we start to struggle with our fear or with our depression, and if we start to lose we can get angry because we can't control our fear or depression, and then we start feeling powerless and all these negative emotions just compound each other dirty discomfort as soon as we start fighting with that emotion, fighting is a switch like they call it and the action turns on and it says everything is ready the discomfort is going to escalate quickly the fight the switch is like an emotional amplifier turn it on and then not only do we have cravings age but also anger at our anxiety anxiety at our anger depression at our depression or guilt at our fault or all of the above some people are very talented and can like every negative emotion at the same time its not necessarily a beneficial talent but i know the people you know basically went through their behavior analysis and you identified that they end up feeling all those feelings as a result of the initial negative feeling so the six core principles prevent the emotional control agenda from being undermined as soon as people realize it that trying to control it won't work, we'll lay out the six basic principles known to help clients develop psychological flexibility.
We all like the spread of flexibility, it just sounds like it is. We're going to get a little fuzzy right now.


ok i will accept is what contact with the present moment is that observing myself reminds my fly on the wall values ​​and committed actions so let's look at the cognitive distribution of learning to think seeing images and memories as pieces of language as opposed to something dangerous. it's a memory it's a thought it can't hurt me now. I can choose to hold it, I can choose to magnify it, or I can choose to let it in and out.
Cognitive diffusion means taking a step back and realizing that thoughts are just momentary private subjective events, which means it's not objective truth. what happened but what you remember is your subjective version of what happened if you were scared if you were depressed think about a race there are five runners in a race one person wins and four people lose the person who won is like a score you know who remember the event as very positive, the four people who lose one person say hmm. I need to speed up my work, another person tells me I better get off the block, the third person identifies something else he can work on, and the fourth person says I'm a total failure. but everyone had different subjective interpretations and subjective memories of that event, so a simple exercise that came out of some of the lectures, think about a negative self-judgment that takes the form of I am X I am stupid I am lazy I am, of course we know that we're going to think about negative things because our clients don't usually come to us and tell us I'm great, believe it as much as you can, and we haveSpeaking of this earlier, how does it affect you when you tell yourself repeatedly that now,some of you probably think of Stuart Smalley, look in the mirror and walk away.
I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and people like me, but anyway when people have a negative thought, they start to impersonate them, they take on the negative thought and it affects them mentally, it affects them. emotionally, if you keep telling yourself you're stupid, how does this work to make you happier, how does this work to make you less anxious, then turn it around or add the phrase I think I get the idea that I'm stupid, see what happens when add the clause before or in the sentence. It's been a while since the English started noticing guilt from the distance of thought and also as I mentioned before they don't talk about themselves anymore, it's not this global internal stable thing they talk about, no it's not them, that is X. it is a thought that tells you your X and we can silence the thoughts we can make them disappear diffusion techniques some things and if you google it you can find many more.
Mind treats mind, it's an external event, almost like a separate person, my mind does it, I don't have to. interpret it that way. I don't necessarily have to accept or reject it. I can only watch what my mind is doing and stay awake. I think that helps people learn that thoughts aren't, is it possible to think of thought as a and do X, is it possible to think it's too scary but do it anyway, is it possible to think I'll never make it? get over it and get over it anyway absolutely thoughts are not causes they are just interpretations or our minds best guess what will happen another technique is who is in control here treat negative thoughts as harassers if person is constantly having negative thoughts than telling them they are stupid is not good it will never do any good for the person to be treated like a bully and say I don't have to listen to you or some kind of radical acceptance approach here this negative thought comes into my head I'm stupid ok , you're right, so now what are you going to do about it instead of discussing it instead of trying to contradict it instead of posting it here?
They say it's okay, maybe there's something in what you say. how can i fix it what can i do about it bring me closer to my values ​​and an ACT we always want to have that clause at the end to bring me closer to my values ​​acceptance means allowing for unpleasant feelings feelings, urges and other private experiences we don't have to let them settle there but we have to sit down to understand or accept the fact that they will come and then go like you meet an unwanted family member that comes stays all night and then leaves you know and just doesn't let them unpack and stay there for a while we want to allow them to come and go without fighting with them running away from them or giving them undue attention so back again to that family member you have Uncle Bob and he has been given the worst kisses homemade and shows up at your door one day and says, "Hi, I was just passing through town and thought I'd spend the night with you and you're great." so you could wrestle with Uncle Bob and say no you really can't he was like oh but why do you use up a lot of energy trying to theoretically tactfully tell him no and he doesn't get it or do whatever he loves the room or Everybody loves Raymond and hide under the door when you see him coming like everyone else does? downstairs getting off turning off the lights thats also not the best reaction and it takes a lot of energy or giving him undue attention and getting really mad that bob had the audacity to show up at your door probably wont do any good so you can just let him come and go without fighting with that unhooks thoughts and feelings don't always lead to action you may be really angry that bob did this, but does that mean you have to act angry? does that mean you have to ruin the rest of the night not necessarily what you can do to disengage your thoughts from your feelings identify the problem when we are struggling with an internal experience it distracts us and derails us so if we are debating something and we are C instantly going and coming and you know it's been scary before but we know we have to, oh my gosh I don't want to make him go to a meeting with Uncle Bob maybe you don't want to go because you know he's just going to get drunk and be loud and obnoxious, you can fear it, fight it, think about it, and persevere, but that just uses a lot of energy, so it comes back to the question of at what cost you can explore the effects. of avoidance and how that has worked in your life you know if you've tried to stop Uncle Bob from not answering his phone calls you know we saw it didn't work he just showed up at the door anyway so you know maybe we should just figure out a different way to approach it define the problem identify what you're fighting against and the barriers to moving in the direction of those goals you have a friend who just retired from the military and struggles a lot with feeling good and self-efficacy and everything you're used to to the military lifestyle h He's used to the camaraderie and it's scary to have to take on a whole new life now so he's fighting this anxiety and fear and everything that keeps him stuck so in an acceptance CT we would look for define the problem what is it that you are terrified of that let's list all those things and start identifying the barriers to moving in the direction of those objectives.
I'm not saying you don't have a right to be terrified. you are what you are However, I don't love you. unpack and stay there and the serenity prayer change what we can accept what we can't and the wisdom to know the difference too often people try to change the unchanging like other people or the weather or you know many things we have no control over some things facebook for example sometimes you just have to turn on facebook um thinking about uncle bob you know you've known uncle bob for 30 years and he hasn't changed yet so try to change him now it probably won't work because he's happy the way he is, so we can continue to try to change him, which isn't going to work, or accept the fact that he's just Uncle Bob.
I hope no one has an Uncle Bob. choose in it contact with the present moment bringing full awareness of your experience here and now with open interest and receptivity focusing and fully committing yourself to whatever you are doing so when you are doing it focus on how i feel i mean how You're sitting in your chair right now, how am I feeling, what am I thinking? trying to really figure out what's going on with that patient's contact with the present moment theoretically would be to stay focused in the here and now and try to identify the things that relate to this presentation, you know, thinking about the clients that you're dealing with has worked or t I'm thinking how you could use this in future sessions today, even if you can't be completely in tune with my voice. in the chair and I am a very active talker but I also move a lot in my chair I am just like that the physical sensations can be if you are HOT if you are cold if your leg goes to sleep if you are sitting on a hard chair think about you know what are we supposed to think when we are working on the computer if we are sitting with a good posture and relaxed or our neck and shoulders describe the environment smell temperature colors objects people sounds etc challenge yourself to take a break every hour or two you know not everyone can afford to have an hour to do it and go through them and just bring mindfulness to the here and now for a week every hour throughout the day you are awake for a week of practice becoming in touch with the present moment see what happens may not have any effect but i guess it will you can also do this through a simple i see hear and smell blank and remind myself da every time i smell pine-sol it reminds me of my grandma's house so its a nice memory for me when i smell it triggers happy feelings and neurochemicals happy and happy happy happy so guess how i clean my house with the observant me yes i told you i love this little fly accessing a continuity of consciousness that is changeless ever present and impervious to harm have you ever tried to get a fly?
I'm not good at catching flies. perspective, yes I have some paranoid delusions, but we are moving from this perspective, it is possible to directly experience that you are not your thoughts, feelings, memories, impulses, sensations, images, roles, or physical body, so if you imagine yourself as When you fly on the wall, you can look at that person of yours and say, why is he doing that or that's crazy or ask or have a nice day today. These phenomena are constantly changing and our peripheral aspects of you, but they are not the essence. or who are you so this fly is seeing your periphery this fly is just watching and seeing you act or react the way you think if you get a new dog and especially an older dog a rescue dog and they have some behaviors and you are like where did that come from contextual what is going on what gave them in the past but the dog is also sitting there watching you go are you sure you want to do that so value clarifying what is most important in the background? your heart and some people hate that phrase but you know when it comes down to it, what is nearest and dearest to you, what kind of person do you want to be, what is important and meaningful to you and what do you want to represent in this life now anyone One of those could be a full rehearsal and you could ask a client to do one every week for four weeks to help you begin to identify your values.
Steven Hayes has a whole series of books that walk you through these six steps and help you help customers. most effectively implement all six components of a TC, but he clarifies that he has a whole book on it, so obviously it's not just four bullet points, there are many different ways to help clients clarify their values ​​versus what they said. you should think or feel a lack of values ​​or confusing goals with values ​​can underscore underlying ability inability to be psychologically flexible so if you are confusing a goal with value i want to be rich that is not a value which is your value that is a goal why you want to be rich why you value money i am talking about the next step in the act process is choosing a direction and setting the will identify motivating values ​​which direction i want to go and again h how do you make that get closer to where I want to be and who I want to be with and establish the will to help regain control of life, not necessarily just to control thoughts and feelings, so am I going to take control of my life? and I will understand that there will be bumps in the road but I will also understand that I will also be able to feel the good things because I am in touch with the present moment that is committed action setting goals guided by your values ​​and taking effective action to achieve them sometimes this is it calls purposeful action everything you do has a purpose and that purpose is to get you closer to where you want to go not push you back and i told you we would end up with the act matrix and that is a whole different book there are activities on psychological flexibility that work with this , but to try to put it all in context and tie it with a handy little bow on top, you have your behaviors and your expert $0.05 ignienting what others can observe when you walk into a room what others see others see you others see others people in the restaurant others see the expressions on your faces others can feel the temperature of the room but don't know what's going on inside your head and they don't know what you're thinking down deep inside are your thoughts emotions and inner experiences now this project or this activity divides this into four quadrants so when you look to the left side you are taking me away from your goals and values ​​so what I make me stay away from discomfort and since this keeps me from my goals or values, then many times clients will come in and say when I am very stressed.
I have a few drinks. It's okay, that's what you do and we're not judging. We are not doing anything. now that's taking me a lot away from my goals sometimes it's fear depression anxiety that's why they're here so you take that dysphoria i'm just going to generalize it and when you feel alone because of it you drink then the person is stuck on this left side of the activity, this left side of the quadrant thingy, because once they drink, they've just escalated, they haven't fixed anything, they just escaped for a while, then they sober up and they're still dysphoric, so we move here and say , okay, what's moving me? towards my goals I first have to know what my goals are, so who is important to me? what am i thinking or emotionally experiencing that i am moving towards my goals or values ​​and things these are things like achievement success happiness observable things things other people can see that are moving you towards your goals and values ​​what i could do to move towards who and what is important to me andwhat am i doing right now that is moving me towards my goals or values ​​so when something happens people maybe they're in a bad relationship and they decide to break up and it's unbearable and it's just you know they're in agony over the loss of this relationship, so they're down here, they feel something negative and they want to escape, but then we say, okay, it's definitely something you could do, however, escaping moves you more towards your goals and values, does it? move to where you want to be, the answer is probably no, so we say, okay, what could you do that would help you move to that or maybe you're thinking about getting back into relationships? hip that's one of their options if they're not going to run away maybe they just need to suck it up and get back into the relationship then we say ok that will get you towards your goals of being happy and successful and whatever you want.
I've identified it or it's logically going to take it away from I mean, this is all very, I don't want to say clinical, but it's very factual to encourage people to keep that in their head every time they do something or have to make a decision. or have a thought if you have a thought that says you are stupid, you should ask yourself if that internal dialogue will lead me towards my goals or if it is that internal dialogue that will stop me or worse, move me. I will be moving further from where I want to be in six months.
Act's goal is to create a rich and meaningful life while accepting that pain inevitably accompanies it. It just so happens that part of living a rich and meaningful life is being mindful and in the present moment. most of the time I'm actually we're not going to stay fully grounded and present 24/7/365 because we get caught up and we work we get caught up in things but if we can encourage ourselves to do it several times a day, then we will be more aware of where we are as we are and how we feel destructive normality is the psychological process of a normal human mind that can be seen as destructive and creates psychological suffering people begin to feel that they are helpless are trying to get rid of something that's normal you feel anxious that's a normal feeling that's a normal reaction i fully understand why you feel that right now what do we do about it actions designed to avoid the experience in the present are not going to be helpful we want to help people only identify and accept therapeutic interventions focus on two main processes d developed by developing acceptance of unwanted private experiences that are out of personal control so that the automatic thought that automatic feeling that happened now is there is no need to beat yourself up because it happened let it go if you pay attention to it it's like a mutt if it pay attention it will keep coming back trust me i have more than one stray dog ​​coming to my house oops! anyway and commit an action to live a worthwhile life once you have decided to try to let go of controlling the things you can't control then you can use all that energy to make decisions and take action to move where you want to go. see how great it is that if you stop being stressed by being stressed or worried by being angry you have much more energy to do what you want to do this also applies to holding on to resentments you know we are talking about people who use a lot of energy to nurture grudges and resentments to feel whatever that feeling is something they can choose to let go you don't have to keep feeling it you can choose what to do about it confronting the gym agenda to de-stress you're not going to de-stress it's going to happen so explore the sources of the distress explore previous attempts to eliminate distress and that effectiveness how it worked for you in the short term may have worked very well how it worked for you in the long term as far as what was the cost and how did it impact the other areas of your life and bring you closer or it took you away from your goals and, finally, the six basic principles of Act are diffusion, the separation of the self from the experience, acceptance and I know what contact with the present is. moment through mindfulness observing yourself as a fly on the wall identifying values ​​and then choosing a committed action

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